Trump Indictment of Raul Castro Signals Imperial Takeover, Historian Warns

历史学家警告：特朗普指控劳尔·卡斯特罗预示帝国式接管 2026年美国对古巴前总统Raul Castro提起的谋杀指控，是美国对这个陷入崩溃且资源匮乏的岛国进行直接军事干预或友好接管的战术前奏。 在本期节目中，Joe Rogan与Joey Diaz展开了广泛的探讨，内容涉及Diaz近期膝关节手术后的康复过程、BPC-157等新兴生物黑客方案，以及他在科罗拉多州过去的狂野轶事。他们剖析了格斗运动，分析了Ilia Topuria等现代UFC选手，并回顾了Matt Serra传奇般的沉着心态。此外，两人还深入探讨了武术电影的演变、古巴不断变化的政经格局，以及早期喜剧生涯真实残酷的生存现状等文化议题。 Joey Diaz分享了他在重大膝关节手术后的康复经历，指出他使用Voltaren以及BPC-157和TB-500等高科技生物黑客方案来消除慢性疼痛。 (0:01) 主持人探讨了20世纪70年代体育界使用同化类固醇和尸体提取人生长激素的历史，重点提到了NFL球员Lyle Alzado极具攻击性的表现及其早逝。 (2:35) Joe Rogan和Joey Diaz批评了现代合法大麻产业，指出过高的税率、庞大的启动成本以及严苛的监管正导致新泽西州和加利福尼亚州的许多零售店倒闭。 (10:58) Joey Diaz解释了他在演员试镜期间如何创造性地利用THC，以截然不同的视角审读剧本并发现材料中隐藏的细微之处。 (17:38) 剧烈减重引发的严重脱水会在选手的脑部持续长达24小时，使他们极易遭受击倒。 (32:35)

In an expansive conversation, Joe Rogan and comedian Joey Diaz reflect on physical wear, surgical rehabilitation, and their survival through poverty and crime, while analyzing shifts in combat sports, drug regulations, and cultural discipline. Surgical Recovery, Physical Therapy, and Health Hazards (43:26) Rogan and Diaz examine the physical tolls of athletic wear, aging past 60, and major joint surgeries. Diaz details his recovery from knee operations—including staying awake under an epidural block during an initial ACL reconstruction and later managing a locked bucket-handle meniscus tear—stressing that rigorous pre-surgery physical therapy is essential to prevent muscular collapse. They warn against over-relying on cortisone injections for joint pain, noting that repeated shots degrade tendons without repairing structural injuries, and contrast modern rehabilitation tools like hyperbaric chambers, peptides, and Whoop sleep tracking with older, destructive habits. Historically, physical performance enhancement and drug-test evasion carried severe medical dangers. Rogan notes that until 1985, human growth hormone (HGH) harvested directly from human cadavers exposed recipients to fatal prion diseases like Creutzfeldt-Jakob, citing football star Lyle Alzado’s public confession of steroid abuse before dying of a brain tumor at age 43. Diaz similarly recalls dangerous 1980s tactics used to beat probation drug tests—ranging from drinking white cleaning vinegar and relying on ineffective fruit pectin (Certo) to inserting crushed pool chlorine cubes into his foreskin—contrasting that era's desperation with today's commercial synthetic urine products. Combat Sports, Stance Versatility, and Weight-Cutting Dangers (32:35) The speakers trace how combat sports evolved across three historical waves: the kung fu boom sparked by Bruce Lee in 1973, Chuck Norris's mainstream action cinema, and the mixed martial arts revolution ignited by Royce Gracie and the UFC. While boxing icons like Marvelous Marvin Hagler fought without modern anxieties over brain trauma and confounded opponents by switching ambidextrously between southpaw and orthodox stances, modern MMA faces severe structural challenges around weight management. Cutting extreme weight is characterized as an exhausting practice that leaves athletes depleted and vulnerable to one-shot knockouts caused by dehydrated brains. Highlighting past weigh-in crises like Travis Lutter’s extreme dehydration before facing Anderson Silva, Rogan argues that eliminating weight cutting entirely would improve fighter performance by an estimated 20%. They also praise the legendary durability of Minotauro Nogueira, who survived a head-first slam from 350-pound Bob Sapp to secure an armbar victory, while cautioning that modern leg locks carry high risks of catastrophic joint damage. Comedy Endurance, Criminal Origins, and Hollywood Grit (67:39) Reflecting on their early careers, Diaz and Rogan discuss surviving financial desperation before finding stability in stand-up comedy. Diaz recounts a chaotic chapter between 1987 and 1991 in Boulder, Colorado, involving four years of probation, fraudulent lawnmower returns between Kmart and Longmont, and accumulating store credit vouchers ("Jeffrey bucks") through Toys "R" Us refunds. Both view stand-up comedy as a vital turning point that prevented long-term incarceration or financial collapse, recalling years of driving unsafe cars and surviving on $15 to $25 sets at the Comedy Store. Longevity in entertainment is framed as a matter of psychological endurance rather than raw talent alone. They observe that many exceptionally gifted early peers vanished from the scene after quitting during personal or legal crises. While corporate venues like the Laugh Factory felt sterile and focused on television development deals, the competitive atmosphere of the Comedy Store forced comics to hone authenticity. Diaz adds that regulated cannabis consumption helped temper his baseline anxiety and provided fresh cognitive angles when improvising sets or reviewing audition scripts. Cannabis Commerce, Mushroom Legalization, and Cuban Geopolitics (14:25) The dialogue evaluates the shifting economics of cannabis and psychedelics, noting that opening a modern dispensary requires roughly $3 million in startup capital amid intense saturation, a stark contrast to the medical dispensaries of the 1990s. Rogan and Diaz advocate for the full legalization and taxation of psilocybin mushrooms—proposing tax rates as high as 100% to generate public revenue—and criticize the 1970 Controlled Substances Act under Richard Nixon for stunting research into the neurological benefits of psychedelics. Turning to international history and Diaz's Cuban background, the speakers discuss reports from June 2026 alleging that the Cuban government began distributing weapons to civilians amid US military tensions. Diaz contrasts Fulgencio Batista's regime with Fidel Castro's takeover, which destroyed the lucrative American mob casino network and spurred an exodus of workers to Las Vegas. They express skepticism regarding prospective resort redevelopments in Cuba, citing unexploded coastal mines remaining from the Bay of Pigs era and entrenched ideological resistance among residents. The conversation highlights how physical discipline, persistence, and accountability allowed both speakers to survive chaotic early lifestyles and navigate demanding careers. Rogan and Diaz leave open questions regarding how societal shifts—such as pervasive digital addictions, institutionalized sports betting apps like DraftKings, and lingering federal drug prohibitions—will influence younger generations.

Joe Rogan与喜剧演员Joey Diaz围绕手术康复、药物与药检历史、格斗技艺演化、早期犯罪救赎及数字时代社会变迁展开对谈。对话指出，无论是职业体育对身体的极端压榨、喜剧底层在贫困中的坚持，还是现代社会对数字技术的病态依赖，个体总在规制束缚与生存本能之间寻求平衡。 身体康复与违禁物质的滥用历史 (2:35) Rogan与Diaz围绕关节手术康复展开交流，Diaz结合自身膝盖手术与半月板损伤，强调术前利用抗阻带和Bullworker等器械进行肌肉预康复的必要性，并批评了传统医疗动辄要求运动员彻底放弃训练的保守建议。对话随即延伸至竞技体育违禁物质的黑暗历史：Rogan指出，20世纪中叶至1985年间，人体生长激素（HGH）普遍直接从人类尸体中提取，后因传播致死性朊病毒疾病（克雅氏病）被全面禁用，如今已完全被人工重组技术取代；美式橄榄球运动员Lyle Alzado在43岁因脑瘤去世前曾公开承认自1969年起长期滥用类固醇，并声称当年九成运动员均在使用。 面对衰老与机能退化，已过花甲之年的Diaz分享了利用Whoop手环确保八小时睡眠、每日“干吞”10毫克肌酸以改善短期记忆的日常习惯。此外，Diaz回忆了1989年前后为应付假释期尿检所采用的荒唐偏方，包括饮用白醋混合佳得乐、服用自制果酱增稠剂Certo（果胶）等无效手段；甚至因误以为泳池除藻药剂能掩盖毒物，将氯块压碎藏于包皮内带入考场，最终破坏了检测设备。这些极端案例反映出早期缺乏科学规范下的监管对抗与药物滥用混乱。 格斗技艺演进与极端减重的身体代价 (32:35) 对话系统回顾了现代武术在美国普及的三次浪潮：从李小龙引发的咏春与功夫热潮，到Chuck Norris代表的影视空手道流行，再到Royce Gracie在早期UFC赛事中展现降服技术并确立巴西柔术（BJJ）的统治地位。在技击技巧之外，Rogan重点批评了MMA界根深蒂固的极端脱水减重现象。他指出，选手称重时往往极度虚弱，大脑脱水使其极易在比赛中遭受一击毙命的重创；若赛事能彻底禁止减重，选手的运动表现与抗击打能力有望普遍提升20%。二人以Pereira在免除脱水升入重量级后的爆发力，以及Travis Lutter对阵Anderson Silva前严重脱水仍以地面技巧压制的旧事，印证了减重对身体机能的严苛消耗。 此外，二人还讨论了传奇拳手Minotauro Nogueira在颈部遭受毁灭性重摔后逆转降服350磅Bob Sapp的强韧表现，以及Marvin Hagler在拳击黄金时代自如切换左右架攻防的技术造诣。同时，他们也谈及足跟勾等下肢关节技在日常实战中极易造成不可逆韧带撕裂的恐怖风险，并警示了DraftKings和FanDuel等现代体育博彩应用泛滥对年轻群体带来的深远成瘾危害。 大麻产业阵痛与精神物质的药理价值 (14:25) 谈及大麻合法化，对话揭示了该行业光鲜背后的残酷经济现实：开设一家合法大麻零售店往往面临高达300万美元的初始资金缺口，而在新泽西州Englishtown同一街区便挤满了四家零售店，过度饱和的竞争让零售商举步维艰。Diaz回忆了1990年代医用大麻早期的“混乱拓荒期”，当时处方门槛极低、产品剂量缺乏监管，经营者甚至面临恶性枪击风险。然而，对话也确认了大麻素的治疗潜力，例如演员Dave Foley曾借助CBD有效逆转了严重的关节炎致残症状。 在表演创作方面，Diaz坦言THC虽能帮助喜剧演员打破思维定式、捕捉剧本细微语感并缓解基线焦虑，但过量摄入同样伴随着舞台失控的高风险。对于迷幻药，对话主张对裸盖菇素蘑菇推行合法化并征收高达100%的重税，以创造公共财政收入；二人批评尼克松政府在1970年通过的《受控物质法案》阻断了科学研究，并引用阿尔茨海默病失语症患者在摄入5克裸盖菇素后重获语言能力的轶事，强调致幻剂在神经可塑性修复方面的未开发价值。 喜剧救赎、底层骗术与好莱坞法则 (67:39) Diaz详细坦白了自己在科罗拉多州博尔德的灰色犯罪岁月，包括在Kmart拾取顾客遗弃的发票后盗取对应割草机骗取400美元退款，以及在玩具反斗城通过退货获取大量被称为“Jeffrey Bucks”的代金券兑换物资。历经1987至1991年的假释纠缠，并在地区检察官Bill Wise协助下免除监管后，脱口秀成为阻止他重蹈覆辙的关键抓手。Rogan与Diaz感慨，早年间在Comedy Store每场演出仅拿15至25美元报酬，为了赶场甚至要用弹力绳绑住破旧汽车的车门；二人未曾妄想暴富，仅仅凭借持续不断的登台磨炼与播客时代的真实表达，最终完成了阶层跨越与人格重塑。 对话还借由好莱坞野史揭示了娱乐工业的残酷与反常。二人提及制片人Al Ruddy以及Marlon Brando的轶事：Brando在拍摄《现代启示录》时严重违背减重契约，以近400磅的体重大幅超标亮相，迫使剧组只能在暗光与阴影中完成拍摄，但其无可替代的真实质感仍成就了影史经典。他们指出，洛杉矶名利场充斥着俱乐部派系政治与残酷淘汰，多数人往往在突破即将来临的前夕因家庭与生计压力而被迫放弃。 屏幕成瘾、地缘隐忧与城市发展断层 (6:30) 对话深入探讨了智能设备与社交媒体对人类注意力和心理机制的侵蚀。Rogan指出，全天候沉浸于智能手机和算法推送是近二十年才出现的反常生理现象，年轻一代的注意力跨度已被严重瓦解，甚至难以完整观看一部电影；网络评论区的无成本攻击进一步放大了人性恶意，这种持续的数字依赖实质上是人类迈向永久性电子异化的初级阶段。与此同时，二人对比了大西洋城周边街区的严重破败与拉斯维加斯的繁荣，指出紧邻赌场的贫民窟与街头毒品交易凸显了单一博彩驱动模式下的城市治理失败。 话题最后延伸至古巴的地缘政治与历史遗留问题。对话回顾了1950年代Batista独裁时期意大利黑手党在哈瓦那控制的奢华博彩帝国，指出卡斯特罗政权取缔赌场后迫使黑帮残余转移至美国本土；针对2026年6月外媒关于古巴政府因美军动向而向平民分发武器的报道，二人直指贫困政权武装饥饿民众背后的巨大动荡风险。Diaz还分享了自己试图出资接济古巴亲属却遭其因意识形态依附而拒绝的真实经历，展现出地缘封锁与长期规训对家庭伦理的撕裂。 本期对谈将创伤医疗、街头诈骗前科与格斗演进、好莱坞幕后生态交织串联，呈现了一个边缘个体通过喜剧艺术完成自我救赎的微观样本。然而，对话中关于大麻素与裸盖菇素神经修复功效的断言多依赖于个人体验与孤立轶事，对地缘冲突与博彩经济效应的探讨亦带有明显的经验主义色彩，缺乏系统性的临床数据与政策量化论证。

## Background 该视频由强大的 PowerfulJRE 频道于 2026 年 6 月 10 日发布在 YouTube 平台上。视频简介指出，本期嘉宾乔伊·迪亚兹（Joey Diaz）是一位单口喜剧演员、演员兼作家，同时也是播客《The Church of What’s Happening Now: The New Testament》的主持人和自传书籍的作者。 ## TL;DR 在长达两个多小时的对谈中，乔·罗根与老友乔伊·迪亚兹以膝盖手术后的康复用药为切入点，漫谈了 70 年代体坛滥用类固醇的悲剧、大麻行业的现实困境、校园博彩地推的泛滥以及 UFC 瞩目大战的深度博弈。同时，迪亚兹毫无保留地解密了自己早年在博尔德及监狱里的荒诞犯罪史、尿检作弊等疯狂偏方，并温情回顾了两人全凭卑微演出支付梦想的喜剧初心。节目最后还深入剖析了现代科技成瘾、古巴当前的政治军事危机与黑帮历史，并在一片东海岸美食狂热中落下帷幕。 ## Atmosphere & style 整个节目洋溢着一种老友重逢特有的江湖气与市井幽默，充满着粗粝、狂野而又真挚的情感。两位主讲人的互动松弛而气定神闲，迪亚兹用他那标志性、充满黄暴比喻的通俗演义式叙事，将当年的铁窗岁月和犯罪荒诞剧讲得绘声绘色，引得现场爆笑连连。听众能清晰感受到一种历经千帆后的沧桑与反省，在历数往昔混乱、毒品与黑帮恩怨的同时，流露出对喜剧人生、坚守力量以及业力善意的崇高敬意，整体氛围既疯狂搞笑又充满温情。 ## Key takeaways - [00:12](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=12s) Voltaren（扶他林）已成为非处方级别的强效抗炎药凝胶，但其产品说明中指出不应将其用于急性拉伤或瘀伤等损伤。 - [02:11](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=131s) 20世纪中叶至1985年间真实存在过尸源性人类生长激素（HGH）的使用，后因发现其会传播致命的朊病毒疾病——克雅氏病而完全被合成重组 HGH 取代。 - [03:59](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=239s) 传奇球星阿尔·埃拉因长年滥用合成类固醇导致心理成瘾与严重脑瘤，临终前公开反思并揭露了体坛和健美界所谓的“纯自然”谎言。 - [11:46](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=706s) 大麻合法化后给加州和新泽西带来了惊人的巨额税收（某些地方税率高达39%），但如今由于政府前期过度引导扩建，大量实体大麻店面临白热化竞争与倒闭潮。 - [23:16](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1396s) 早期美国大学迎新活动多由信用卡公司主导办卡，而如今已被 DraftKings 和 FanDuel 等线上合法博彩巨头的地推展位取代，博彩在校园的定向渗透引发了社会担忧。 - [24:51](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1491s) UFC 冠军选手伊利亚·托普里亚凭借连续 KO 三位 MMA 历史级名将的传奇战绩，在对阵贾斯汀·盖奇的赛事中被各大博彩盘口视作极大的统治级热门。 - [32:35](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1955s) 格斗界现行的减重机制下，极度脱水导致选手大脑在称重后24小时内无法完全复原，增加了被一拳 KO 的风险，目前 UFC 已全面禁止赛后通过静脉注射（IV）补水。 - [39:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2361s) 德国最新推出的生物基质凝胶注入疗法和骨内干细胞疗法已经能够促进软骨再生，相比之下，传统皮质类固醇（封闭针）的频繁注射会降解肌腱和退化关节。 - [47:26](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2846s) 智能可穿戴设备的 LED 光学测量系统存在局限性，其光线无法有效穿透大面积的纹身墨水（油墨），从而容易导致心率变异性（HRV）和血氧等读数不准。 - [49:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2961s) 裸盖菇素（迷幻蘑菇）等特定精神活性物质在科学研究与临床中展现出重塑神经连接的价值，可用于治疗阿尔茨海默症失语或严重口吃，但罗根强调心理极度脆弱者使用可能导致精神失常。 - [56:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=3381s) 布莱特·韦恩斯坦提出争议性假说认为现代社会食物过敏率飙升与接种疫苗有关，其所含的铝刺激物激活免疫系统的同时，可能导致免疫系统错误地对日常物质产生抗体。 - [02:25:56](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=8756s) 2026年5月特朗普政府因1996年击落飞机旧案正式起诉古巴前总统劳尔·卡斯特罗，随着美军在周边集结，古巴政府向平民分发武器防范入侵，地缘政治局势极其紧张。 - [02:33:12](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=9192s) 1959年古巴革命爆发后卡斯特罗取缔了黑手党在哈瓦那开办的全部赌场，直接引发了博彩从业人员向美西大沙漠的“大逃亡”，间接促成了今天拉斯维加斯的博彩业繁荣。 - [02:35:23](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=9323s) 历史上的“猫鼬行动”等秘密政府项目表明，由于无法追踪的巨额财富驱使，黑帮大佬曾与 CIA 联合联手，试图通过各种手段暗杀卡斯特罗以重夺古巴业务。 ## Detailed walkthrough ### [00:12](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=12s) 膝盖手术后的恢复与神奇药膏 在一阵例行的寒暄后，乔·罗根（Joe Rogan）对坐在对面的老友能够如此迅速地行走感到非常震惊，因为对方不久前才刚刚再次接受了膝盖手术。朋友得意地表示，手术后仅仅过了三天，他的膝盖就已经恢复到了“顶峰状态”。不过，就在昨天，他在纽瓦克机场因为走了太多路，还是把膝盖给“搞砸了”。平时他习惯在健身房散步，或者在社区里吃早晚饭时转一转，但那都是固定且轻松的循环路线。而昨天在机场，他相当于走了整整十个来回。 幸运的是，他随身带了一包大麻馆子（edibles）上了飞机。服下后，他向空姐要了一些冰块敷在膝盖上，这才把红肿消了下去。随后，他又涂抹了一种被他戏称为“液体可卡因汁”的神奇药膏。这种药膏在过去一度变成处方药甚至违禁品，但现在已经可以在药店柜台直接购买。罗根对这种能麻痹眼部或关节的药膏感到陌生，朋友一时间想不起准确名字，在 Voltran、Voltrax 之间摇摆，并开玩笑让罗根别听他瞎编，直接去谷歌搜索。最终他们确认这款药膏叫作 **Voltaren**（扶他林）。 - **Voltaren（扶他林）**：一种非甾体抗炎药（NSAID）凝胶，具有处方药级别的强度，可通过皮肤渗透缓解关节疼痛、炎症和僵硬，广泛用于骨关节炎和肌肉酸痛。 - **使用禁忌**：产品说明指出不应将其用于急性损伤（如简单的拉伤或瘀伤）。罗根对此感到十分困惑，因为人们通常会用布洛芬等药物来处理这类问题。 - **术后用药限制**：朋友透露自己因刚做完手术，无法服用布洛芬，只能遵医嘱使用泰诺（Tylenol）。 --- ### [02:11](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=131s) 兽药 DMSO 与 70 年代的马尸提取物之谜 罗根随即向朋友安利了另一种止痛神器——**DMSO**（二甲基亚砜），并直接拿出一瓶塞给对方，打趣道：“我这人买东西喜欢成批发货，留着吧，对伤痛真的很管用。”朋友看着药瓶，调侃这又是另一种像格林（Ketamine）那样的“马用镇静剂”或兽药。罗根承认这确实广泛应用于兽医领域，但在缓解人类疼痛和伤病方面效果极佳。 两人的话题很快从现代药物拉回到了 70 年代早期的类固醇乱象。朋友感慨道，在 70 年代大家根本不知道自己往身体里注射的是什么“鬼东西”，所有的药物几乎都来自德国。罗根则提出了一个惊人的观点：当时的人类生长激素（HGH）其实是从**人类尸体**（cadavers）中提取出来的。为了验证这一猜想，罗根让助手杰米（Jamie）在他们由 AI 赞助的搜索引擎 **Perplexity** 中进行查询。 - **尸源性人类生长激素（Cadaver-derived HGH）**：Perplexity 的搜索结果证实，这种激素在 20 世纪中叶至 1985 年间被真实使用过。后因发现其会传播极其危险的朊病毒疾病——**克雅氏病（Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease, CJD）**而停止使用。现已完全被合成的重组 HGH 取代。 - **克雅氏病与疯牛病**：罗根解释称，克雅氏病实际上就是“疯牛病”的一种。这种病毒的传播原理与食人族因为食用人类大脑组织和神经元而染上的怪病一模一样，令人毛骨悚然。 --- ### [03:59](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=239s) 传奇球星阿尔·埃拉的类固醇悲剧与体坛谎言 在翻阅资料的过程中，杰米在屏幕上调出了美国早期体育健将**阿尔·埃拉（Al Alzado）**的悲惨故事。阿尔·埃拉是美国最早公开承认滥用合成类固醇的体育明星之一。他在生命的最后一年与脑瘤进行了顽强的抗争，并坚信正是自己长年累月地滥用类固醇，直接导致了这一致命疾病。在《体育画报》的一篇自述文章中，埃拉曾写道，自己从 1969 年开始服用类固醇后便再也无法停下，这在心理上带来了极强的成瘾性。他甚至爆料称，他认识的运动员里有 90% 都在使用这玩意儿。埃拉在文中反思道：“人类生来就不是为了拥有 300 磅的体重或跳过 30 英尺远。”类固醇让他不仅在球场上变得极度暴力，在场下也形同疯子。 埃拉曾在 1979 年的丹佛街头，因车身被刮蹭而开着车疯狂跨越街区追逐对方，最终将对方拽出车外暴打。而在生命垂危之际，他身体摇晃、行走困难，甚至连记忆力都严重衰退，回答问题需要思考很久。听到埃拉在 43 岁就因癌症去世，朋友不禁感叹：“这正好是我现在的年纪。”屏幕上的埃拉临终前戴着头巾，面容枯槁。资料还提到他被选入了“国际犹太人体育名人堂”，这让罗根和朋友大呼意外，在此之前他们甚至不知道还有这么一个名人堂的存在。 - **体坛的“自然”谎言**：朋友认为，埃拉的悲剧和后来的身体崩溃是头部撞击与体内各种药物产生化学反应的共同结果。罗根则借此痛批健美界和体育圈的谎言：“就像那些健美运动员坚称自己是‘纯自然’（natural）一样，快闭嘴吧！没有‘黑科技’的帮助，根本不可能有人能练到那么大块头。” - **极端基因的罕见性**：罗根承认世界上确实存在极少数拥有“怪物般基因”的人，能够通过纯自然的方式练出极其强壮的体魄，但这在现实中绝对是凤毛麟角。 --- ### [06:15](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=375s) 优步司机的神奇身份与奥斯汀的 Waymo 机器人危机 朋友随后分享了自己昨天在奥斯汀打优步（Uber）的一段奇遇。当罗根询问司机是谁时，朋友兴奋地宣布：“那是**约埃尔·罗梅罗（Yoel Romero）的亲侄子**！而且他自己也是个柔道冠军！”两人在车上用西班牙语痛快地聊了 15 到 20 分钟。朋友顺便吐槽道，现在奥斯汀的优步司机几乎清一色都是古巴人。 罗根笑着插话称，这些古巴司机很快就要被自动驾驶机器人（Waymo）取代了。朋友对此深有体会，他回忆起上一次来奥斯汀时，亲眼看到一个古巴司机在街上对着一辆自动驾驶汽车破口大骂。那辆机器人汽车在路上加塞切断了司机的路线，气得那个古巴人直接跳下车对着空无一人的车厢一顿输出，直到骂到一半才猛然意识到对方只是个机器人，只能尴尬地丢下一句“我的错”（My bad）走回车里。罗根坦言自己对这些自动驾驶汽车毫无信任可言，完全无法理解那些敢坐在后座任由机器开车的乘客。 - **Waymo 里的流浪汉**：罗根分享了最近听到的一则荒诞新闻。一名 Waymo 乘客在拿完行李后忘记了关闭后备箱或车门，以为机器会自动处理。结果一个流浪汉乘机溜进后座并关上了门。当下一位女乘客预约并坐进这辆 Waymo 时，迎面撞上了这个流浪汉。流浪汉不仅没有离开，反而开始对着女乘客破口大骂，质问她：“你为什么要给机器人送钱？为什么要支持机器人？！” --- ### [07:16](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=436s) 大西洋城的黑帮往事、大麻高税率与毒品交易的边缘体验 接着，朋友讲述了自己本周在大西洋城的惊险遭遇。他的女儿周末在距离大西洋城 25 分钟车程的蛋港（Egg Harbor）参加球赛。为了陪女儿打周日的比赛，他放弃了奢华的 Ocean 酒店，转而选择和队里其他家长一起入住 Harrah's 酒店。比赛结束后，他驱车前往大西洋城一家号称当地最大的知名大麻店。上周他在特伦顿（Trenton）离州议会大厦仅一个街区的大麻店里，曾被店员神神秘秘地带到后台，买到了包装成各种口味的“蓝哈瓦伊”迷幻蘑菇巧克力。 而这次在大西洋城，当他把车停在大麻店门口时，迎面碰上了四个戴着粗金链子、身材极度魁梧的非裔男子。他们正从一辆价值不菲、看起来像要“摧毁小镇”的豪车（罗根猜测是 AMG G-Wagon 或凯雷德 Escalade）里下来。这四个人一眼就认出了朋友，兴奋地大喊：“哟！你就是那个经常上罗根节目的家伙！”其中一人还用手机查出了他的资料，兴奋地喊道：“不，他是电影《最长的一码》（The Longest Yard）里的那个演员！” 正当他们站在街头热火朝天地聊着罗根、UFC 和电影时，一个身材瘦小的黑人流浪汉（瘾君子）晃晃悠悠地走了过来。流浪汉先是低声问那几个黑人壮汉：“这个白人天王老子是谁？”听到对方介绍这是《最长的一码》里的橄榄球明星后，流浪汉立刻开启了乞讨套路，一瘸一拐地走到朋友面前说：“嘿，橄榄球明星先生，为什么不给我破开一张一美元呢？”朋友在四个黑人壮汉面前感到极度尴尬，被迫掏出了一张 10 美元的大钞。没想到刚才还瘸腿的流浪汉拿到钱后拔腿就跑，显然是直奔毒贩去买克拉克可卡因（crack）了。朋友和罗根都对这些边缘人群的江湖套路感到哭笑不得。 - **大西洋城的治安现状**：罗根和朋友一致认为，大西洋城赌场之外的街区治安极其糟糕且真实。朋友透露自己在周六晚上 10 点开车转了转，某些街角阴暗得让人感觉“进去了就别想活着出来”。罗根回忆起他们上次去那儿时，光天化日之下就能在马路上目睹毒品交易。 - **与拉斯维加斯的差距**：大西洋城目前的经济状况举步维艰，完全无法与拉斯维加斯抗衡。罗根分析指出，拉斯维加斯占据了历史先机。如果现在想平地起家再建一个拉斯维加斯，在如今到处都能赌博、甚至手机上就能下单的时代，根本是天方夜谭。 --- ### [11:46](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=706s) 拉斯维加斯的黑道起源与加州/新泽西的大麻税务困局 顺着赌城的话题，朋友和罗根聊起了拉斯维加斯的建城史。朋友指出，拉斯维加斯最初在 30 年代只是美国士兵在行军或运输途中的一个“歇脚点”（pit stop）。而后来真正掌控并打造这座地下赌城的，正是大名鼎鼎的洛杉矶喜剧商店（The Comedy Store）的前幕后老板。那个黑道天才当年从芝加哥的工会和吉米·霍法（Jimmy Hoffa）的卡车司机工会（Teamsters）手里借了巨额贷款来盖赌场，但由于工程开销是个无底洞，他自己又过着电影明星般穷奢极欲的生活，引起了黑手党高层的强烈不满。最终，他在自己洛杉矶的豪宅里被杀手开枪射穿了眼球。 罗根随后提到了 Denver 在合法化初期的现金乱象。由于早期法律不允许大麻店使用信用卡结算，所有交易必须全部使用大清早的纯现金。当时的毒贩和大麻商人为了运送数百万美元的现金，甚至要雇佣六个全副武装到牙齿的美国特种部队退役人员（如绿贝雷帽或海豹突击队）进行押运。最让国家和政府无法抗拒的，是合法大麻带来的惊人税收。 - **39% 的离谱税率**：罗根指出，当时某些地方的大麻税率高达 **39%**。如果把 39% 的税加在酒精或者免治牛肉上，民众绝对会掀翻掀政府，但在大麻上，烟民们却高高兴兴地接受了。 - **疫情期间的“必需品”**：在疫情大封锁期间，洛杉矶的大麻店被归类为“非闭店不可的必需行业”（essential businesses）获准开业，但代价是被政府额外加征了 **10%** 的“抗疫税”。尽管加州和新泽西在大麻上赚得盆满钵满，但朋友指出，由于政府前期画大饼过度引导扩建，如今大量实体大麻店已经开始面临倒闭的财务困局。 ### [14:25](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=865s) 大麻行业的现实与早期的“西部世界” 开一家大麻店需要背负巨大的财务压力，一上来可能就得面临负债300万美元的开局。面对这笔巨款，靠卖一袋袋20美元的小额大麻来回本，显然是一个极其漫长且艰难的过程。更糟糕的是，这个行业的竞争已经进入了白热化阶段。洛杉矶的大麻店数量多到令人咋舌，而在新泽西州的英利什敦（Englishtown），甚至出现了一条街上同时开着四家大麻店的奇观。 这让两人回忆起了早期大麻行业尚处于“仅限医疗用途”的特殊时期。那时候，他们曾一起去过恩格尔伍德（Englewood）的一家名为“恩格尔伍德健康中心”（Englewood Wellness Center）的店买大麻棒棒糖，甚至《恐惧因素》（Fear Factor）节目里出现的棒棒糖也是从那里弄来的。不过那家店后来的经历十分血腥——当时负责管理那家店的负责人遭遇了枪击。在那个年代，只要有医疗借口就能合法购买大麻，而所谓的医疗借口也是五花八门，比如只要说一句“我的脚痛”，就能顺利登记购买。 * **行业竞争**：新泽西州英利什敦同一街区聚集了4家大麻店。 * **历史背景**：恩格尔伍德健康中心活跃于上世纪90年代，当时只要有任意医疗理由（如脚痛）即可购买。 --- ### [15:28](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=928s) CBD的奇效与大麻软糖的质量乱象 对于练习武术的人来说，身体疼痛是家常便饭，而大麻素（THC和CBD）在缓解疼痛方面的确有着显著的效果。含有CBD的软糖对治疗各种酸痛非常有效。一个生动的例子是喜剧演员戴夫·弗利（Dave Foley），他曾因严重的关节炎导致双手功能受损，但在开始服用CBD之后，他的手竟然完全恢复了正常功能。 然而，伴随着CBD的爆火，市场也随之变得鱼龙混杂。在缺乏严格监管的“灰色地带”，大量无良商家涌入。这不同于正规药厂生产泰诺（Tylenol）等药物的严格流程，早期的大麻软糖成分非常不稳定。你可能吃一个觉得足足有1000毫克的效果，而吃另一个却感觉只有100毫克。在那个缺乏包装警告、剂量全靠猜的野蛮生长时代，大麻零食的威力常常让人始料未及。有一次因为吃了过量的大麻布朗尼，在搭乘飞往匹兹堡的红眼航班时，腿部开始止不住地疯狂颤抖。 * **名人案例**：戴夫·弗利通过服用CBD治愈了其关节炎引发的手部功能障碍。 * **剂量乱象**：早期软糖缺乏标签警告和统一标准，单次服用体感差异可能高达10倍（100毫克与1000毫克的差距）。 --- ### [16:45](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1005s) 航班上的恐慌发作与喜剧演员的THC“违禁药” 大麻零食带来的不确定性常常引发各种疯狂的体验。在一次飞行途中，大麻引发了严重的恐慌发作，当时的感觉就像是“心血管正在闭合，墙壁也在向我逼近”，甚至一度恐慌到想要让飞机掉头。然而，在强忍着熬过一个小时后，居然又当场补了两颗。这种有些疯狂的举动纯粹是为了“碰碰运气”，就像哥伦布冒险一样。在下午两点多闲得发慌时，便想看看会发生什么。唯一的顾虑是当晚是否有脱口秀演出，如果有，则会稍微克制一下剂量，将其控制在几百毫克以内，因为在舞台上摄入过量软糖是非常危险的。 > "乔·罗根，我当时差点就下飞机了。我受不了，无法呼吸，我的心脏就像要闭合了一样，胸口紧得要命。墙壁在向我逼近，我觉得飞机要坠毁了，整个人彻底吓疯。我差点让他们把飞机开回去。但是，宝贝我回来了，再来两颗。" 不过对喜剧演员来说，适量使用THC有时候就像是某种“违禁物质”，它能带来意想不到的艺术效果。在一次长达五周没有登台、面对台下50名观众非常紧张的情况下，在上台前服用了一颗软糖。在完全没有准备任何文本素材（Material）的情况下，反而顺着关于去医院的闲聊找到了极佳的节奏，最后在舞台上整整即兴发挥了一个小时。THC能让人彻底放松下来，摆脱日常生活中的焦虑。这对于一个每天早上八点半在四季酒店喝咖啡时、会因为莫名的焦虑而误以为自己有地方要赶的人来说，大麻成了对抗精神内耗的工具，甚至能让人果断划掉日程表上驱车前往纽约市做播客这种漫长而痛苦的行程。 --- ### [20:35](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1235s) 东海岸与奥斯汀的交通差距及政治人物的入场反响 在纽约或新泽西地区开车绝对是一场噩梦，驱车前往某地往往会占据一整天的核心时间。如果你中午在新泽西有个日程，那么两点半去健身房的计划基本上就泡汤了，因为你很可能会被堵在路上长达3个小时。相比之下，德克萨斯州奥斯汀的交通简直不值一提，所谓的堵车最多也就是多耽误10分钟。东海岸的人口密度之高，只有在频繁往返于新泽西和纽约之间时才能深刻体会。比如去新泽西参加UFC（终极格斗冠军赛）的称重仪式，晚上6点还要赶回纽约吃饭、打台球，整个行程宛如在一个疯狂的杂耍场里穿梭。喜剧演员吉姆·弗洛伦汀（Jim Florentine）甚至吐槽过，仅仅因为纽约尼克斯队的比赛（甚至当天他们都不是主场作战），进城的车程就被拉长到了3个小时。 在这种敏感的交通状况下，政治人物的出席往往会让情况变得更糟。此前有传言称特朗普可能会去现场观看NBA比赛，这引发了许多人的不满，因为其随行的高规格安保协议会让原本就瘫痪的交通雪上加霜。舆论普遍认为特朗普更应该留在UFC的赛场上，因为在其他体育赛事中他很可能会遭遇嘘声（尽管也有人表示现场是嘘声与欢呼声并存）。但在UFC的赛场上，特朗普是绝对的红人。他曾先后六次左右亲临UFC现场，每一次走入赛场时，现场都会播放着《American Badass》的音乐，身边簇拥着基德·洛克（Kid Rock）、白大拿（Dana White），有时还有塔克·卡尔森（Tucker Carlson）。这阵仗简直就像是“保守派的复仇者联盟”（Conservative Avengers），全场只有雷鸣般的欢呼，那些说他在UFC被嘘的报道完全是扭曲事实。 --- ### [23:16](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1396s) 体育博彩的盛行与大学校园的博彩渗透 在讨论比赛的同时，两人的话题转到了体育博彩上。在前一晚尼克斯队的比赛中，因为看衰尼克斯队而和杰米（Jamie）一起下注了让2.5分的盘口，结果大获全胜。目前主要使用DraftKings这类移动端App进行线上投注，现在已经不再需要依赖传统的线下“外围庄家”（Bookie）了。纽约和新泽西两地近期刚刚捣毁了一个多达39人的黑手党地下博彩团伙，去年还发生过一起涉及篮球教练通过透视扑克牌进行作弊的赌博大案。 现代合法博彩的扩张速度已经快到了令人担忧的地步。回想起以前上大学时，新生迎新会（Orientation）一结束，教学楼外就排满了Discover、Mastercard和Visa等信用卡公司，大学生仅凭学生身份就能当场办下一张250美元额度的信用卡。而如今的大学迎新日上，取而代之的则是DraftKings和FanDuel这类博彩巨头的地推展位。这种向缺乏自控力且背负着沉重学生贷款的年轻群体定向“割韭菜”（Coping these kids）的行为，预计会在5年内让整个社会付出惨痛的代价。目前不仅美国如此，澳大利亚的博彩风气也同样疯狂。 * **地下博彩打击**：新泽西与纽约近期捣毁了一个39人的黑手党博彩犯罪链条。 * **校园博彩地推**：DraftKings与FanDuel等合法博彩平台已全面渗透至美国大学的新生迎新活动中。 --- ### [24:51](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1491s) UFC瞩目大战：托普里亚 vs 盖奇的巅峰对决 UFC赛场上即将迎来一场瞩目的白热化大战——伊利亚·托普里亚（Ilia Topuria）对阵贾斯汀·盖奇（Justin Gaethje）。目前在各大博彩盘口中，托普里亚被视作极大的热门，其赔率高达-426（约为4比1），而凯撒娱乐（Caesars）给出的盘口甚至倾向于6比1。这种夸张的赔率源于托普里亚近期堪称MMA冠军历史上最传奇的连胜纪录：他在最近的三场比赛中，接连KO了亚历山大·沃尔卡诺夫斯基（Alexander Volkanovski）、麦克斯·霍洛威（Max Holloway）以及查尔斯·奥利维拉（Charles Oliveira）这三位历史级名将。面对这种统治力，几乎没人敢把筹码压在他的对手身上。如果此时在盖奇身上押注25美元，一旦爆冷就能赢回100美元。 然而，赛事的变数依然巨大，盖奇绝非毫无胜算。托普里亚在轻量级的UFC首秀中（当时是短时间临时救场），曾对阵身材高大且擅长站立打击的贾伊·赫伯特（Jai Herbert）。第一回合中，托普里亚曾被赫伯特一记近乎完美的换腿高格挡踢中头部并击倒，但他凭借惊人的恢复能力缠住对手并拖入地面，最终在第二回合完成了震撼全场的逆转KO。 * **选手赔率**：伊利亚·托普里亚（-426，约4比1或6比1热门）；贾斯汀·盖奇（受热捧的下盘，4比1赔率）。 * **托普里亚战绩**：近期连续KO了沃尔卡诺夫斯基、霍洛威、奥利维拉三位MMA传奇选手。 --- ### [26:56](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1616s) 贾斯汀·盖奇的“战锤”风格与战术演变 贾斯汀·盖奇在八角笼里就像是一柄人肉“战锤”（Warhammer），他极其享受那种充满硝烟的正面大乱斗。在加入UFC之前，盖奇曾在WSOF（世界格斗系列赛，PFL的前身之一）效力，当时他就凭借近乎自残式的疯狂低踢（Leg kicks）把对手折磨得痛不欲生。那时候的他完全不讲究所谓的战术，打法充满了纯粹的混乱与毁灭性。 他在UFC的首秀对阵迈克尔·约翰逊（Michael Johnson），那场对决堪称UFC历史上最疯狂的战役之一。盖奇全场像一只毫无防备意识的比特犬（Pitbull）一样，疯狂地将自己抛向对手，双方都在比赛中遭受了重创。盖奇的每一个动作都奔着“致死率”去，始终保持向前推进。虽然这种杀敌一千自损八百的风格导致他早期输掉了一些原本靠战术能赢的比赛，但当他开始懂得克制和管理这种混乱、将其转化为“技术性暴力”后，他便开启了一段统治级的连胜。即使如此，他依然是格斗界最危险的刀锋舞者。在与小鹰哈比布（Khabib）的对决中，他也曾通过精准的卡夫踢（Calf kicks）重创过对方。盖奇最擅长在内围缠抱（Collar tie）的同时施加低踢，在第二回合中，他用极其残暴的顶膝和各种毁灭性的打击，将迈克尔·约翰逊彻底摧毁。 ### [29:42](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1782s) 马文·哈格勒的传奇拳风与硬核时代 两人谈到了格斗选手的拼命风格。这种风格绝非“在这儿碰碰运气、在那儿投机取巧”的战术型打法，而是从比赛一开始就全盘押上。马文·哈格勒（Marvin Hagler）等老一辈拳击手在场上根本不会去考虑脑损伤的问题。就像早期的橄榄球运动员一样，那个时代的硬汉们满脑子只有战斗。 谈话中提到哈格勒对阵穆斯塔法·哈姆绍（Mustafa Hamsho）的经典战役。当时的哈格勒正值巅峰，展现了令人叹为观止的竞技状态。最让解说赞叹的是哈格勒极强的换架能力，在那个鲜有人掌握此技术的年代，他能够极其流畅地在左撇子站架（southpaw）和正轨站架（Orthodox）之间来回切换，让对手根本无从判断重拳会从哪个方向砸过来。哈格勒在两种站架下的战斗力同样恐怖，那种刻苦和高度的自律令人由衷敬佩。 ### [30:41](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1841s) 西里尔·盖恩对决亚历克斯·佩雷拉：重量级悬念 话题转向了本周备受期待的UFC重量级对决。根据最新的赔率盘口，西里尔·盖恩（Ciryl Gane）与亚历克斯·佩雷拉（Alex Pereira）的比赛赔率几乎持平，这在凯撒皇宫（Caesars）的盘口里被称作“互有胜负的盲盒对决”（pick'em）。对于佩雷拉在UFC重量级赛事的首秀来说，一上来就面对盖恩无疑是一场硬仗。 盖恩是一位极其棘手且技术细腻的选手。作为重量级的大块头，他的步伐却轻盈得像在八角笼里跳舞。他有一个非常怪异的招式，当他侧身站立时，能直接用前腿起一记扭转踢（twisting kick）狠狠甩进对手的腹部，这种在实战中非常罕见的腿法效果拔群。在之前对阵汤姆·阿斯皮纳尔（Tom Aspinall）的比赛中，盖恩在因插眼叫停前，在站立打击上的得分已经非常漂亮。面对佩雷拉这种“只要你犯错就能一拳终结比赛”的恐怖力量，盖恩可能会选择利用步伐在核心外线游走。 ### [32:35](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1955s) 减重的残酷代价与不减重的“类固醇级”优势 进入重量级的佩雷拉看起来已经完全适应了体重，整个人围度暴涨，极其壮实。更重要的是，他不需要经历任何痛苦的减重和脱水过程。在格斗世界里，不需要减重去参赛是一项巨大的优势，其效果“简直就像获准服用类固醇一样”。如果MMA运动能彻底取消减重制度，选手的表现绝对能提升20%以上，因为他们会更健康、更有韧性。 现行的减重机制下，许多选手在称重后的24小时内根本无法让大脑完全恢复补水。脱水严重时，选手们在称重仪式上看起来简直像“饱受癌症折磨”一样面目全非。虽然以前选手们还可以在后台通过静脉注射（IV）来补水，但后来这项操作也被官方禁止了。那些极度脱水的选手就像使用了十年的GLP-1药物一样，形容枯槁，几乎是在硬生生撑着走过秤。 - **减重负面影响**：脱水导致大脑在24小时内无法完全复原，大大增加了被一拳KO的风险。 - **政策变化**：UFC已在后续规定中取消了赛后通过静脉注射（IV）进行快速补水的做法。 ### [33:51](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2031s) 特拉维斯·卢特的脱水惨状与至高柔术赞誉 说起最惨烈的减重名场面，当属安德森·席尔瓦（Anderson Silva）对阵德克萨斯柔术高手特拉维斯·卢特（Travis Lutter）的那场比赛。在当时的实打实动真格的称重现场，卢特已经干瘪到无法正常迈步，只能在地上机械地拖着脚挪动，双唇干裂。然而就是这样一位在台下几乎快要死掉的选手，第一回合一上来就成功将席尔瓦摔倒在地，精准执行了他的战术。 卢特同时也是凯文·霍兰德（Kevin Holland）的教练。当年在《终极格斗》（The Ultimate Fighter）节目中，其他选手对卢特的地面缠斗水平给出了极高的评价，甚至将他与Ricardo Liborio这种殿堂级大师相提并论，称他在地面上简直是在“横冲直撞，肆意碾压”。他是安德森·席尔瓦那个现代MMA黄金时代里，最早一批真正顶尖的巴西柔术黑带之一。一旦被他拖入地面，对手就会陷入真正的绝境。如今的查尔斯·奥利维拉（Charles Oliveira）也具备这种让对手在地面感到窒息的恐怖统治力。 ### [35:24](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2124s) 巴西顶尖拳馆的血统与“大脚怪”萨普的惊天一摔 奥利维拉来自著名的“意气拳馆”（Chute Boxe），这家拳馆曾孕育了安德森·席尔瓦、Mauricio "Shogun" Rua、Murilo "Ninja" Rua以及裸拳时代的传奇猛将Pelé。两人随即考据起另一位传奇柔术大师“大头”诺盖拉（Minotauro Nogueira）的师承背景。诺盖拉兄弟是Pride时代的顶级世界级双胞胎选手，诺盖拉更是在Pride赛场上第一个能在处于下位被动时、频繁从防守底线降服精英选手的冠军。 提到诺盖拉，就不得不提他当年与身高体壮、体重高达350磅且满身腹肌的“大脚怪”鲍勃·萨普（Bob Sapp）的那场疯狂对决。比赛刚开场，萨普就把诺盖拉高高举起，直接大头朝下狠狠砸在垫子上。这一摔直接摧毁了诺盖拉的颈椎，导致他留下了纠缠多年的严重伤病。但即便遭受了如此非人的重创，诺盖拉依然硬生生挺了过来，并在随后的回合中用一记惊天十字固（Armbar）反败为胜。经过现场查询维基百科确认，诺盖拉的巴西柔术黑带最终是由传奇教头Ricardo De La Riva亲自授予的。 - **Chute Boxe拳馆名将**：Anderson Silva、Murilo "Ninja" Rua、Mauricio "Shogun" Rua、Pelé。 - **Minotauro Nogueira师承**：主教练为Omry Bet，巴西柔术黑带介绍人及导师为Ricardo De La Riva。 ### [38:05](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2285s) 让人恐惧的腿锁与乔·罗根的膝盖顽疾 谈到地面降服，两人聊到了技术动作的危险性。腿锁（Leg locks）是一项让人毛骨悚然的技术，只要在防守或转弯时稍有不慎，关节处就会传出恐怖的骨裂声，直接把人废掉。乔·罗根透露自己已经有一年多没有进行实战对练了，原因是他长期的膝盖伤势。 罗根表示，自己的膝盖在过去半年里经过积极康复虽然有所好转，但之前只要一上强度就会反复肿胀。这起因于一年前他在野外狩猎时不小心扭伤了关节，后来在全力踢重沙袋时又多次旧伤复发。由于罗根的膝盖某一部分已经完全没有了半月板，导致骨头与骨头之间直接发生摩擦，如果不极其小心，很快就会引发严重的关节炎。 ### [39:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2361s) 尖端医疗矩阵与老派手术的“凿子和锤子” 当下的医疗技术已经无限接近于彻底攻克这类关节难题。德国最新推出了一种生物基质（biological matrix）凝胶，注入膝盖后可以替代受损的半月板，同时还有能够直接进入骨骼内部促进软骨再生的干细胞疗法。这让经历过传统“粗暴”手术的一方大发牢骚。过去医生只会推荐打封闭、注射皮质醇或者普通的富血小板血浆（PRP）疗法。当年由于缺乏研究，很多老派选手直接同意了激进的膝关节置换手术，在手术台上看到医生摆出来的凿子和铁锤时，魂都快吓飞了。 > “如果你当时了解这些，你绝对不会让他们切开你的膝盖。那时候我甚至还害怕打针，结果我竟然选了膝关节置换，这太荒谬了。” 很多时候，人们往往因为看了某些医学科普或者孕期指南里的极端案例而产生恐慌。比如有些书里写着“43岁大龄产妇生孩子可能会死在手术台上”，让人焦虑到甚至不敢要孩子。但事实上，现在的医学已经让50多岁甚至55岁的女性都能顺利生产。 ### [41:39](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2499s) 戒断宿醉、频繁抽血与神经阻滞的体验 经历过大手术的人在医院里什么大风大浪都见过了。曾有一次为了做某种特殊的反应测试，护士需要在3个小时内，每隔20分钟就抽一次血。如果是在以前没吃早饭、带着在喜剧母舰俱乐部（Mothership）喝Ron White果汁和龙舌兰的宿醉状态下跑去抽血，选手通常不出几分钟就会脸色苍白、浑身大汗，必须在背部和脖子上敷冰块来防晕厥。 在第一次膝盖受重伤时，由于不想过度依赖容易让人成瘾和丧失理智的口服止痛药，医生推荐使用神经阻滞（nerve block）。那种由专门的疼痛管理部门操作的麻醉方式体验非常奇特，就像是“直接把大腿的开关给关掉了一样”。虽然在这个过程中整张脸都会毫无血色，但确实有效地隔离了常人难以忍受的剧烈疼痛。 ### [43:26](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2606s) 脊髓麻醉奇观：清醒着观看自己的ACL手术 聊到硬膜外麻醉（epidural block），乔·罗根分享了自己人生中第一次前交叉韧带（ACL）手术的硬核经历。当时他主动向主刀医生提出请求，希望在手术过程中保持完全的清醒。因为他坚信自己这辈子只想受这一次罪，他必须亲眼看看自己的身体内部到底是什么样子的。 医生最终同意了罗根的请求，并在他的脊椎上扎了一针进行下半身麻醉。罗根在上半身完全清醒的状态下，眼睁睁看着医生切开他的膝盖，从他的髌骨韧带（patella tendon）上削下一条，并连同髌骨和股骨上的两块碎骨头一起，用螺丝钉重新固定在受损的韧带位置上。不幸的是，尽管这次ACL手术大获成功，但罗根在23岁时留下的半月板撕裂隐患，在八年后恶化成了极为痛苦的“桶柄样撕裂”（bucket handle tear），膝关节经常会彻底卡死锁住，带来了难以想象的剧烈疼痛。 ### [45:06](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2706s) 伤病、保健与“运动型尼古丁” 谈到过去的伤病时，讲者回忆起在柔术课上膝盖断裂的经历，当时埃迪·布拉沃（Eddie Bravo）不得不开着他的 NSX 跑车把他送去医院。医生诊断后认为需要切除半月板，并直截了当地区劝他：“你得停止练武了。”讲者当时表面上顺从地回答“好吧，真贴心”，但三十年后他依然在坚持，以此证明医生的断言是错的。随后，两人的注意力转向了录音室里的某种消遣物，讲者询问一种中等剂量的产品是什么，对方解释这是塔克·卡尔森（Tucker Carlson）喜欢的 Alps 品牌尼古丁含片，并称其为“运动型尼古丁”（athletic nicotine），表示 3 毫克的剂量很合适，既能提神又不会让人产生焦虑的抖动。讲者则开玩笑抱怨自己总是误吞这些含片。 * **核心细节**： * **送医事件**：Eddie Bravo 驾驶讲者的 NSX 跑车将其送往医院。 * **产品剂量**：提及的尼古丁含片包括 6 毫克（塔克·卡尔森喜欢的强效款）和 3 毫克（被称为“运动型尼古丁”）。 --- ### [46:09](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2769s) 促智药与大脑认知表现 话题自然延伸到了提升专注力的健康补剂。乔（Joe）极力为促智药（Nootropics）正名，反驳那些认为这全是骗局的观点。作为一名靠脑力吃饭的人，他坚称用与不用促智药有着肉眼可见的差距。虽然这些补剂不会直接提高智商，但确实能让大脑运转得更高效。他举例推荐了像 Ketone IQ 这样的酮类饮品，并解释说大脑在断糖状态下会利用酮体来保持专注。这也是为什么生酮饮食或纯肉饮食（Carnivore diet）的拥趸常常能感受到极佳的“大脑清明感”（mental clarity）。讲者也表示赞同，当自己只吃鸡蛋和牛排时，确实能免受碳水化合物带来的大脑昏沉。乔随后还展示了朋友德里克（Derek）研发的 Gorilla Mind 促智饮料，强调其中虽然含有咖啡因，但更多的是对大脑有益的维生素。 * **大脑燃料**：大脑利用酮体来维持专注，纯肉饮食（steak and eggs）能显著提升大脑运转效率。 * **推荐产品**：提到了 Ketone IQ 以及含有脑部维生素的补剂饮品 Gorilla Mind。 --- ### [47:16](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2836s) 衰老、睡眠与日常作息的改变 另一位讲者聊到了自己近三年来的健忘问题。尽管他对过去几十年的历史日期和故事记忆犹新，但近期的短期记忆却严重退化——比如周一刚通完电话讨论的事，到了周四就忘得一干二净。乔认为这是步入 60 岁后的正常生理变化。随着年龄增长，讲者对睡眠的需求变得极为苛刻，现在必须保证整整 8 小时的饱满睡眠，少于 6 个半小时身体就吃不消。他幽默地分享了自己雷打不动的规律作息：早上 6 点起床送孩子上校车，9 点开始抽大麻，然后去健身房练拳击或做体能训练；到了下午 2 点，他已经精疲力竭，一进家门便一刻不停地直奔二楼，戴上睡眠面罩倒头大睡，甚至连猫都要被他一把推开。 * **年龄与睡眠**：讲者现年 60 岁，必须依靠 Whoop 智能手环监测并确保 8 小时睡眠。 * **每日作息表**：06:00 起床 -> 09:00 抽大麻 -> 健身房训练（拳击/PT） -> 14:00 准时午睡。 --- ### [49:06](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2946s) 肌酸的科学服用法与补剂迷思 乔极力向对方推荐对记忆力和认知极有帮助的补剂——肌酸（Creatine）。讲者透露自己每天分两次服用，总共摄入 10 毫克。在服用方式上，两人都嫌弃肌酸软糖，也拒绝将粉末混入食物，而是推崇一种硬核的“干落”（dry scoop）吃法：直接把 10 毫克粉末倒进嘴里，然后仰头喝水冲服。乔解释说，如果用杯子冲服，粉末容易残留在杯壁上导致剂量不准。随后，话题转向了市面上琳琅满目的补剂，乔提到了另一种能让人身体产生酥麻微痒感的健身补剂——β-丙氨酸（Beta alanine），并感叹虽然市面上烂产品很多，但好补剂也不少。 * **肌酸剂量**：每日分两次服用，共 10 毫克。 * **干落服法**：将肌酸粉末直接倒入嘴中，再用水送服，以保证精准摄入。 --- ### [51:04](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=3064s) 昔日尿检通关的荒唐“民间偏方” 讲者将谈话带回了 89、90 年代那段为了通过药检而展开的荒诞抗争。当时由于疯狂吸食可卡因，为了应付周一的突击尿检，他和身边的瘾君子们尝试了各种毫无科学依据的极端偏方。最初听说吃碘片可以防辐射和过药检，结果吃完后全身皮肤灼伤、满脸通红，尿检依然呈阳性。之后他们又尝试在周一早上用一整瓶佳得乐大口灌下刺鼻的白醋（清洁用的强效白醋），甚至在生殖器皮肤里塞满砸碎的泳池清洁泡腾块，幻想能像净化泳池一样净化尿液，结果不仅差点废了身体，还把尿检机器给弄坏了。 * **失败的偏方列表**： 1. **碘片（Iodine）**：导致皮肤灼伤发红，药检依旧阳性。 2. **白醋（White vinegar）**：周一清晨混合佳得乐饮用，极度伤胃。 3. **泳池清洁块**：压碎后塞入未割包皮的皮肤内，试图污染样本。 --- ### [53:42](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=3222s) 伪科学的揭秘与作弊的极端手段 讲者提到，当年没有互联网，大家只能盲信所谓的“江湖经验”，甚至还疯狂追捧过一种叫作 Certo（一种制作果酱和果冻的液态水果果胶）的偏方。网上至今仍流传着将其与运动饮料混合能锁住体内毒素的谣言。乔在节目中当场用手机查阅了科学实证，无情地戳穿了这一神话：健康专家明确指出，果胶纤维虽然在肠道起作用，但根本无法影响肾脏向尿液过滤的药物代谢物。随后，乔分享了格斗界和瘾君子圈子里更令人毛骨悚然的作弊传闻：早年间在 UFC 等赛事刚开始药检时，有疯狂的选手为了保留一身肌肉不愿断药，竟然在赛前通过导尿管或注射器，穿刺将别人的干净尿液直接打回自己的膀胱里，其极端的赌博行为令人唏嘘。 > "许多网络论坛建议在尿检前几小时将 Certo 与大容量运动饮料混合饮用……但医学研究表明，没有科学证据能证明水果果胶可以可靠地清除尿液中的药物或毒素。" --- ### [58:39](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=3519s) 假尿、硅胶道具与成人用品店的骗局 在节目的最后，两人审视了如今已经高度产业化的假尿市场。在 1989 年，市场上几乎没有任何现成产品，人们甚至得用热水袋和胶带把儿子的干净尿液绑在身上作弊。而现在，互联网上到处可以买到名为“恋物癖尿”（fetish urine）的袋装假尿和硅胶假阳具（Wizzinator）等道具。乔嘲讽道，这些产品为了规避法律监管，不得不贴上“非供人类消耗”或“恋物癖用途”的搞笑标签，假装是专门卖给那些喜欢“黄金圣水”特殊癖好的人。讲者也顺势爆料了一个圈内熟人的荒唐轶事，那人曾连续 11 次把假释官和警长拒之门外，甚至还在同性恋俱乐部里让一浴缸的人往自己身上撒尿。 ### 通渠剂与爆裂的验尿机 在一阵关于疯狂派对和推特怪相的闲聊后，话题回到了主线。Jose 绘声绘色地描述了他当年在假释期间为了应付毒检而使出的绝招。为了混过尿检，他甚至把“通渠剂”（Drano）倒进了装尿样的袋子里。当他若无其事地把袋子放在柜台上，办事人员正按例询问近况时，那袋混了化学剂的液体竟然开始疯狂起泡，甚至直接从洗碗机袋子里满溢了出来。 办事人员毫无防备，直接拿起来准备测试。Jose 坏笑地透露，过去常用的老花招是故意不拧紧盖子让尿样漏出来，这样就能名正言顺地多拖延一周的时间。但这次放了通渠剂，袋子因为没有氧气而在里面剧烈摇晃、化学反应急剧加剧。几天后，假释官打电话怒斥道：“听着，我写了一份报告，我要把你告上法庭，因为你把我们的机器弄坏了！这日子没法过了！”这简直成了一场荒诞的猫鼠游戏，假释官崩溃地质问他到底往自己身体里注射了什么东西。最终，假释部门对他的折腾彻底投降，直接表示“我们连尿检都不想让你做了，我们受够了这种精神折磨”，直接给他的案子挂起了。 * 通渠剂引发的剧烈化学反应导致假释部门的验尿机器彻底损坏。 * 过去为了争取时间，常用的技巧是故意不拧紧尿样瓶盖使其泄漏，以此多宽限一周。 * 假释部门最终因为无法忍受精神折磨，决定无限期暂停对 Jose 的尿检。 --- ### 贵人相助与中途之家的混乱 由于在假释期间把事情搞得一团糟，部门本打算把 Jose 重新送回社区矫正中心关上90天。就在这个节骨眼上，他在街上偶遇了一位名叫 Bill Wise 的绅士。两人连续三个月每周见一次面，聊得十分投缘。直到有一天 Jose 询问对方的职业，才得知 Bill 竟然是博尔德（Boulder）当地的地区检察官。Jose 随即像抓住了救命稻草一样诉苦：“哥们，我有大麻烦了，假释部门死缠着我不放，我怎么才能脱身？”Bill 表现得极其慷慨，直截了当地告诉他：“让你的律师起草一份声明，我签个字就能让你解除假释。” 依靠着这位在街头结识的贵人的签字，Jose 奇迹般地结束了从1987年一路纠缠到1991年的假释期。在此期间，他还曾被送回“中途之家”（Halfway House），那里的环境更加失控，充满了各种怪人和疯狂的女孩。Jose 在里面犹如一头脱缰的野马，甚至把会议室的空调偷拆下来装到自己的房间里。中途之家的管理人员最终也对他彻底绝望，直接对他说：“老兄，你直接回家吧，我们再也不想惹你了。”因为在体制里，只要你足够无赖、不断折腾，他们最终就会觉得“这不值得，你永远不会停手”，然后彻底放弃你。 * **Bill Wise**：博尔德地区检察官，在街头与 Jose 结识，因在琼贝妮特·拉姆齐（JonBenét Ramsey）案期间的表现，后来与其他许多人一起被解雇。 * **假释大限**：Jose 的假释纠纷从1987年一直持续到1991年，其中有整整一年他都在用各种尿检花招戏弄官方。 * **中途之家恶行**：Jose 曾盗窃会议室的空调据为己有，因过于难以管理而被直接“劝退”回家。 * **办公室恋情**：一年后，Jose 甚至与假释办公室里一名只有一条腿、喜欢点中餐外卖的女性职员发生了一段荒唐的私情。 --- ### 席卷博尔德的恶魔与罪恶感 时隔31年，Jose 坦言自己至今都不敢回到博尔德，因为那座城市实在太美丽了，而当年的自己却把那里当成了混乱的纽瓦克。他在博尔德的生活犹如一场漫长的犯罪秀：他会蹲守在 Kmart 的割草机部门外，等顾客推着新割草机出来时，顺手捡走别人掉落或飞走的收据；接着他会把割草机运到朗蒙特（Longmont），堂而皇之地对店员撒谎说是母亲送的礼物但自己不想要了，从而凭收据直接兑换400美元现金外加税款。他甚至还用盗窃来的电脑去 Toys "R" Us 换取大量的“杰弗里券”（Jeffrey Bucks，店内代金券），在里面买了无数的自行车，自嘲当时简直拥有“100万杰弗里券”。 如今年过半百，这种“奇怪的罪恶感”开始在 Jose 心中作祟，他深刻反省自己当年带给那座和平小镇的破坏与混乱。他回忆起1987年丹佛野马队对阵克利夫兰的传奇季后赛期间，整个商场的人都聚在走廊上看电视转播，他瞅准 Radio Shack 没人看管的时机，直接抠出一个崭新的 CD 机，极其嚣张地塞在胯下就走了。现在的他正计划去博尔德的福克斯剧院（Fox Theater）办一场演出，因为他当年的意大利老据点 Leisio 正好要重新开张。他希望借此机会公开道歉、做点慈善捐款，以此来弥补当年的恶行。 * **割草机骗局**：利用在 Kmart 捡到的收据，去朗蒙特门店假退货，骗取400美元现金及税款。 * **Toys "R" Us 销赃**：用偷来的电脑在玩具反斗城兑换无法提现的 Jeffrey Bucks，随后疯狂购买自行车等物资。 * **Radio Shack 盗窃**：趁1987年野马队季后赛期间全员看电视，公然在商场盗窃 CD 机并向保安狂扔 CD。 * **敲诈假黑手党案**：80年代末，一个意大利小个子误认 Jose 是 A&E 频道里播出的波士顿证人保护计划里的黑手党大佬“野兽乔治”。Jose 顺水推舟，强行敲诈对方每周200美元保护费，连续拿了3周，直到对方被迫关门跑路。 * **ATM 毒品派对**：曾在博尔德 Murphy's 旁的室内 ATM 亭子里，带着整箱啤酒把可卡因直接洒在金属台面上吸食，完全无视进出办业务的市民。 --- ### 命运的平行宇宙与卑微的喜剧初心 Jose 遗憾地表示，如果当年自己走正道、把牌打对，凭借当时大学极度缺乏拉美裔学生的社会背景（当时学校只有8个打橄榄球的黑人，极为渴望招收拉丁裔），他这个只有 GED（高中文凭）的人甚至可能被一路保送到毕业去当宇航员。当被问及如果没有走上脱口秀喜剧这条路现在会做什么时，Jose 认为自己大概率会继续打架打拳，或者凭借对烹饪的热爱去当一名厨师，亦或是做一名泥瓦匠。 另一位主持人则分享了自己对命运的看法。他认为，许多人在22、23岁时就早早结婚生子，这虽然没什么不对，但由于要养家糊口，会极大地限制一个人去为梦想拼搏的机会。他回忆起自己21岁刚入行做单口喜剧的日子，当时兜里一分钱都没有，为了买一个三明治，必须把存钱罐里所有的便士、镍币和角币一个个卷起来去凑数。车子因为付不起贷款被强行收回，平时甚至不得不把车藏在车库里躲避催收，日子过得绝对是100%的“月光”。 * 如果没做喜剧，Jose 认为自己可能会成为一名厨师、泥瓦匠，或者继续从事格斗。 * 主持人透露自己年轻时极度贫困，曾用车库藏车来躲避车辆因欠款被强制充公（Repossessed）。 * 两人一致认为，在20岁出头时如果没有车贷、房贷和子女的负担，才能真正毫无顾忌地在极度贫困中坚持喜剧梦想。 --- ### 用15块钱的演出来支付梦想 > "当我把车停在自家屋前，看着这栋房子，我甚至不知道里面住的是谁。这感觉太不真实了。" Jose 感慨地对听众们说，如果你有一个梦想或目标，一定要明白你是用什么去支付它的。在他们刚入行时，两人的目标纯粹只是为了“生存”，能吃饱三餐、有足够的汽油费开到下一场演出就谢天谢地了。Jose 过去认为自己只要每场能赚100美元、开着破车到处跑、哪怕得性病也无所谓，只要没人来找麻烦就行。他直到40岁才第一次去银行开户，以前都是存20块钱进去然后写空头支票硬撑。 主持人回想起自己刚开始讲喜剧时，汽车的门锁坏了，必须用一根弹力绳（Bungee cord）横着拉过来绑在身上固定车门。那根绳子不仅是锁，还兼任着安全带的功能，因为车子只要一往右转弯，车门就会直愣愣地甩开。而如今，他们开着豪车，住着价值数万甚至数千万的豪宅，而这一切的一切，不是靠贩毒，也不是靠家族继承，而是全凭当年在喜剧商店（The Comedy Store）一场场15美元、20美元、25美元的卑微演出活生生攒出来的。他们用一个曾经被所有人嘲笑“你绝不可能成功”的梦想，最终支付了整个人生。 ### [01:13:11](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=4391s) 坚持的力量与那些掉队的人 谈到早期不被看好的经历，嘉宾们感叹那时候旁人总说他们绝不可能和理查德·普赖尔（Richard Pryor）或乔治·卡林（George Carlin）那样的大咖一起登上 HBO。当时大家虽然觉得好笑，但心里也直犯嘀咕，觉得那些泼冷水的人也许是对的，可事实证明他们大错特错。这就好比一个连街区都跑不完的人宣称自己有一天要跑200英里，绝大多数人都会断定他做不到，但真正能成功的人，是那些做好了花十年时间去建立耐力、并坚信下个月就能先跑5英里、半年后能跑10英里、然后一步步走下去的“疯子”。 然而，太多人在“奇迹发生前”就选择了放弃。两人不胜唏嘘地回忆起那些曾经极具天赋、幽默至极却最终销声匿迹的同行。Joe 提到，在喜剧商店（Comedy Store）的早期阶段，他曾极力想帮一把某个非常厉害的新人，甚至把他引荐给自己的经纪人，由衷地鼓励他只要坚持住就绝对能成。遗憾的是，那人后来深陷个人生活泥潭、有了孩子，似乎还卷入了法律纠纷。尽管他们当时都只有27岁左右，对方也感动于“从未有人这样帮过自己”，但最终还是离开了这个行业。 * 成功往往属于那些将宏大目标（如跑200英里）拆解为阶段性耐力训练（从5英里、10英里开始积累），并坚持数年的人。 * 许多在早期比 Joe 更有喜剧天赋、更有趣、更招人喜欢的同行，由于个人生活、子女或法律问题，在迎来转机前就退出了舞台。 --- ### [01:14:52](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=4492s) 善良的“自私”与业力生意 Joe 坚信帮助他人不仅不会分走自己的好运，反而是一种双赢。他开玩笑说，慷慨在某种程度上其实是“自私”的，因为在善待他人、给予年轻人反馈、让他们为自己开场或者帮他们看段子的时候，自己内心也会感到无比充实和快乐。他的搭档则更进一步地指出，他们做的根本不是“喜剧生意”，而是“业力生意（karma business）”。 这种广结善缘的态度延伸到了日常生活的点滴中。搭档分享说，他每天的目标就是至少让一个普通人开心，比如在超市里由衷地赞美一位看起来气色不太好的年长女士，哪怕只是开个无伤大雅的玩笑，也能瞬间点亮对方的一天。很多时候，这些人的丈夫朝夕相处却从不夸奖她们，而一个陌生人善意的举动、一次握手或几块钱的慷慨，不仅不会让自己有什么损失，反而能传递出世界所需要的正能量。 * 慷慨具有情绪反哺作用，帮助他人、看新人的演出并给予反馈，能让助人者自身获得极大的满足感。 * “我们不在喜剧生意里，我们在业力生意里。”——这种信念将两人的日常行为转化为纯粹的善意传递。 * 舞台演出的本质是一种奇妙的情绪交换：喜剧演员通过优秀的段子改变观众的一整晚的心情，看着台下大笑，演员自身也获得了快乐；如果演砸了，则会感觉极其糟糕。 --- ### [01:17:59](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=4679s) 好莱坞的魔法与截然不同的出身 谈到在洛杉矶等地的际遇，他们觉得自己极度幸运。在 Jersey（新泽西）这样的地方，普通人改变命运的唯一指望似乎就是买彩票中个百万大奖；但在好莱坞，他们亲眼见证了无数次“魔法”的发生——两周前还在跟你聊天、住着8人合租房的穷小子，转眼就主演了票房大卖的电影，或者在 CBS 拿到了长达八年的情景喜剧合同。这种环境让人充满希望，真正的聪明人不会嫉妒别人“在1989年的匹兹堡偷了段子”，而是会为同行的晋升感到高兴，因为这意味着自己也在那个成功的轮转队列中。 但这种成功也需要清醒的头脑支撑，正如嘉宾所言，看到周围人一步登天，真正清醒的人会意识到自己必须“戒掉可卡因”以走上正轨。两人聊起金钱时承认，穷困潦倒时他们从没奢望过大富大贵，只是渴望“混口饭吃（make a living）”。Joe 直言自己在主流社会曾是个彻头彻尾的失败者，大学没毕业，高中勉强混过去，除了画画和格斗什么都不在乎，早已向“自己不会成功”的现实妥协；而他的搭档则笑称自己当年情况更糟， felony（重罪）在身、进过监狱、连 GED（高中的同等学力证书）都没有，差点就彻底废了。 * 在好莱坞，阶层跃升是具象可见的，从8人挤一间公寓到在贝弗利山庄买房往往在一夜之间，这种环境能给人提供极大的动力和希望。 * 普通人总以为1000万美元能改变人生并让自己变成更好的人，但这完全是一种误解，他们最初的梦想只是年入10万美金、能过上舒服的生活。 * 进监狱会让人失去所有权利，搭档以幽默的口吻吐槽在美国连睡眠呼吸暂停机（sleep apnea machine）在狱中都很难申请到，以此告诫大家远离犯罪。 --- ### [01:22:32](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=4952s) 互联网时代的蜕变与 Paul Mooney 的启发 Joe 回忆起搭档早期的蜕变，指出他在舞台上的爆发是随着互联网和播客的兴起而发生的。在过去，很多线下的经纪人根本看不懂他的风格，甚至会因为 Joe 带他跑巡演而生气，直言他“既不好笑也没天赋”，把 Joe 逗乐只是因为 Joe 也是个“疯子”和“变态”。然而，播客让观众看到了他真实、立体的一面——就像 UFC 的悍将 Houston Alexander，在八角笼里是个把基斯·贾丁（Keith Jardine）重创KO的“坦克”，但在生活中却是个温柔的电台 DJ，独自抚养四个女儿、清晨给孩子做早饭。播客给了解说、讲故事和展现人格魅力的空间，从而反哺了舞台演出。 最核心的转变在于，他终于学会了把“停车场里聊天时的 Joey Diaz”完美地搬到舞台上。早年（大约1996或1997年相识时）他上台只会死板地背诵纸上的段子，但在深夜11点半的喜剧商店，观众已经看了三个小时的顶级喜剧，没人想听报纸上的新闻。他从传奇喜剧演员保罗·穆尼（Paul Mooney）身上学到了如何“放松”并与观众真正打成一片，把台下的观众当成自己的好哥们。 * 互联网和播客的出现是关键转折点，它向公众展示了喜剧演员在段子之外真实、人性化的一面，从而帮助其在舞台上破圈。 * 前 UFC 选手 Houston Alexander 的故事是一个典型反差：台上的铁血硬汉，台下则是独自抚养四个女儿、会给孩子做饭的 hip-hop DJ。 * 喜剧风格的开悟：从专注于“糟糕的文本和新闻段子”，转变为像 Paul Mooney 那样学会放松，把观众当成朋友进行磁场共振（vibing）。 ### [01:26:42](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=5202s) 从喜剧老将身上汲取的舞台智慧与“马龙·白兰度”式的表演哲学 两位对话者深情回味了喜剧老将穆尼（Mooney）带给他们的启发。穆尼作为经历过早年岁月的真正老手，在后台深受后辈尊敬。与那些只会抱着布鲁斯·斯普林斯汀（Bruce Springsteen）时代的老梗不放、让人感到尴尬的过气演员不同，穆尼的台风总是气定神闲，且极具时效性。无论当天新闻里发生了什么新鲜事，他当晚就能在台上给出整整10分钟稳健、犀利的现挂。他们回忆起穆尼在台上大杀四方、他们躲在休息室后方捧腹大笑的场景，穆尼甚至会得意地在台上自我调侃：“哦，没错，是我写的，老子自己写的！”这种泰然自若的松弛感让当时在台上总是急于求成、把台本字句奉为圣经的讲述者大受震撼。 讲述者借此延伸到了自己早年参加演员试镜的经历。他发现，如果自己在试镜时过于纠结某句台词，往往就拿不到角色。于是他开始效仿马龙·白兰度（Marlon Brando）的表演工具箱——白兰度在拍戏时从不硬背台词，而是让人把提词牌贴在对面演员的身上，从而让表演显得更自然、更有机。讲述者指出，关键不在于死记硬背字面上的词句，而在于深刻理解人物的意图和核心：“词句都是狗屁，只要你知道角色是谁，你用18种不同的方式去骂人都可以。” 他们生动地描述了经典电影《教父》（The Godfather）拍摄现场的趣味幕后：在白兰度和罗伯特·杜瓦尔（Robert Duvall）对戏的经典酒店场景中，杜瓦尔胸前其实挂着一块巨大的提示广告牌。白兰度在镜头前微微抬眼、深沉停顿，吐出那句著名的台词，随后再停顿一下去瞥下一张提词卡。这一切都是为了打破编剧写好的死板框架，让对白像当下自然流淌出来的一样。 * 穆尼的表演特点：台风极为松弛且紧跟时事，当天发生的社会新闻当晚就能在台上奉献10分钟高质量的即兴输出。 * 马龙·白兰度的拍摄手法：在《教父》等电影中大量使用提词牌（Q cards），拍对手戏时让罗伯特·杜瓦尔等人将剧本挂在身上，以便通过停顿和瞥视创造有机的表演节奏。 --- ### [01:29:19](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=5359s) 《教父》背后的质疑、白兰度的任性与制片人阿尔·鲁迪的故事 针对白兰度依靠提词牌演戏的作风，另一位对话者打趣地反问：“那这招在《教父》里奏效了吗？”答案显然是肯定的。他们随后聊起了近期看过的关于《教父》拍摄幕后的索尼流媒体剧集（《教父制造》/ The Offer），感叹当年制片方居然对让马龙·白兰度出演教父持极大的怀疑态度。究其原因，是因为白兰度在此前拍摄《叛舰喋血记》（Mutiny on the Bounty）时极为任性，不仅在片场随心所欲，后期甚至连导演都不当了，自己躲在棚屋里，把摄影机直接塞给副导演。 不仅如此，在拍摄《现代启示录》（Apocalypse Now）时，片方给了白兰度巨额片酬，并要求他必须以180磅的精干身材亮相，以符合绿色贝雷帽特种部队的军人形象。结果白兰度到片场时体重飙升到了400磅。导演组无奈之下只能让他全程置身于阴暗的阴影中，并让他穿着一身黑衣。虽然白兰度完全不按常理出牌、甚至惹人厌恶，但由于最终的银幕效果极其震撼且充满真实感，人们又不得不佩服他的天才。 讲述者还提到自己曾亲眼见过《教父》的传奇制片人阿尔·鲁迪（Al Ruddy）。鲁迪身材高大，有一双大手，非常健谈且为人极好。在完成《教父》后，鲁迪一手打造了电影《最长的一码》（The Longest Yard）。当讲述者等人后来翻拍新版《最长的一码》时，已经功成名就的鲁迪每个星期五都会来到片场，领他那一小笔支票。讲述者在这段拍摄期间和鲁迪成了好哥们，并让助理杰米（Jamie）在网上顺便查一下鲁迪还制作过哪些电影。 * 马龙·白兰度的体重风波：在拍摄《现代启示录》时被要求减到180磅，但他最终以400磅的体重来到片场，迫使导演通过暗光和黑衣来掩盖身材。 * 制片人阿尔·鲁迪：不仅制作了《教父》，还从零打造了经典影片《最长的一码》，在新版翻拍时他依然每周五雷打不动地到片场互动。 --- ### [01:31:04](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=5464s) 奥马哈DJ的硬核人生与格斗家D-Rod的墨西哥惊魂八个月 话题随后转回了他们之前让助理查找的另一条线索：一位来自内布拉斯加州奥马哈（Omaha）的传奇人物。助理杰米查证后确认，此人目前仍在担任电台DJ。更疯狂的是，这位DJ同时也是一名UFC老将，且至今依然在战斗——他在2017年参加过MMA比赛，甚至在2023年还参加了残酷的裸拳赛（Bare Knuckle Boxing），并赢下了全部四场裸拳比赛。对话者不禁赞叹这种一边做DJ一边在台上和人对砸的硬核人生：“这才叫不虚此生，把生活的每分钱都活够了，而不是窝在家里看电视、成天害怕被炸弹炸死。” 接着，他们谈到了从“想做一件事”到“真正迈出第一步”有多么困难，并引出了UFC次中量级名将“D-Rod”丹尼尔·罗德里格斯（Daniel Rodriguez）在播客里分享的惊险遭遇。D-Rod在击败凯文·霍兰德（Kevin Holland）后前往圣地亚哥庆祝，期间和朋友一时兴起决定去墨西哥蒂华纳（Tijuana）喝酒狂欢。当时贵为UFC前15选手的D-Rod随身带了一盎司的大麻，他理所当然地认为大麻在加州已经合法，而在墨西哥也属于除罪化，大不了塞点小钱行贿就能了事。但他忽视了将大麻带过国境线属于联邦重罪，且墨西哥的大麻除罪化政策仅针对本国公民，外来游客绝不适用。 结果，D-Rod在墨西哥被关了整整八个月。为了摆脱困境，他甚至不得不申请并获得了墨西哥的双重国籍。在监狱里，由于完全没有蛋白质补充，D-Rod只能靠吃面条和薯片度日，身体肌肉一度严重萎缩，出狱那天整个人瘦了一大圈。即便如此，他依然坚持在狱中每天雷打不动地训练两次。幸运的是，他在狱中和一个贩毒集团（Cartel）的成员成了室友，对方认出了这位UFC明星，承诺会罩着他。D-Rod便在狱中低调行事专心训练，甚至还带动、启发了一群囚犯跟着他一起锻炼，发现里面不少人其实极具格斗天赋。 * 奥马哈DJ/格斗家：该选手目前仍在担任电台DJ，曾是UFC选手，在2023年的裸拳赛中斩获4战全胜的战绩。 * D-Rod蒂华纳被捕事件：UFC选手D-Rod因误带一盎司大麻跨越墨西哥国境被判入狱8个月，期间因缺乏蛋白质导致肌肉萎缩，靠着贩毒集团室友的保护和每天两次的训练度过了铁窗生涯。 --- ### [01:34:15](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=5655s) 监狱里的幽默、第一次开放麦的恐惧以及术后康复心得 讲述者结合D-Rod的经历聊起了自己当年的铁窗岁月，笑称“一旦你到了地方、认清了哥们、建立起小圈子，监狱其实挺有意思的”，毕竟除了不能出墙，生活还是得继续。他回忆说，自己在里面常常开怀大笑，因为“在监狱里没有人比黑人更有幽默感，他们才是监狱系统的喜剧之王”。正是在监狱里，讲述者在每周三或周四晚上的电影放映时间，面对嫌弃电影烂、大喊大叫的囚犯们，第一次站出来插科打诨，完成了人生中初次的脱口秀尝试。 但真正走向社会的喜剧舞台又是另一番恐怖的体验。从监狱出来后，讲述者花了整整八个月才敢真正去参加第一次开放麦（Open Mic）。当时他极度胆怯，每周都会给丹佛的Comedy Works俱乐部打电话报名，临近了又找各种身体不适的借口取消。直到他的前妻（讲述者开玩笑说，虽然现在恨她，但得感谢她那次的决断）果断请了外婆来带孩子，开车强行把他送到了俱乐部。讲述者至今记得自己刚走下舞台时的迷茫与恐惧，心想“我已经结婚生子了，接下来该怎么走”。结果三个月后，妻子回到家对他说“你是个失败者，我不想和你过了”，讲述者当时的第一反应居然是如释重负地高呼“太棒了，你可真帮了我大忙”。正是前妻的这一推，才让他真正迈出了喜剧生涯最艰难的第一步。 此时节目进行到了两小时的时间节点，讲述者起身上了个洗手间。回来后，两人开始畅聊中老年男性的健康与术后康复话题。63岁的讲述者近期刚做完膝盖手术，他得意地炫耀起自己通过手术获得的“残疾人车位卡”：“有了这玩意，你就像活得像个医生一样，直接把车开到活动现场大门口，假装戴个颈托就能少走很多路！”他表示这个福利是由医生帮他在网上申请的，因为他的身体状况完全符合列表上的所有要求，一下批了三年。 谈到恢复细节，讲述者透露自己术后第三周曾重返拳击馆尝试打沙袋，进行25分钟、8个回合的交替击打。到了第六回合，一位年轻教练热情地邀请他“对对靶”，兴奋的讲述者一口答应，结果一记右手大后摆拳带动的全身发力让他的术后断腿瞬间肿胀，这才让他学乖，此后只老老实实站在沙袋前。此外，他在物理治疗（PT）期间还被教练硬拉着做负重硬拉和靠墙深蹲。为了这次手术，他提前听取了多方建议，服用了包括小檗碱（Berberine）在内的各种膳食补充剂，并严格注射了BPC-157和TB-500等修复类胜肽（Peptides），甚至自嘲排尿的颜色在夜里都能“荧光闪烁”。凭借术前的充分准备，他在术后第5天就丢掉了拐杖，第8天便因为受够了坐妻子开的车在右侧慢车道上吵架而重新自己开车。尽管63岁的膝盖不可能让他下周去UFC和格斗家盖里（Garry）对决，但至少让他重新享受到了无痛的生活。 * 讲述者的喜剧起点：在监狱里通过在电影放映会上面对囚犯即兴吐槽，开启了人生第一次Stand-up尝试；出狱后历经8个月的纠结，在前妻的强迫下才完成了俱乐部开放麦的首秀。 * 术后康复与福利：63岁的讲述者在经历膝盖手术后，严格遵循了BPC-157和TB-500等胜肽及补充剂的疗程，术后5天弃拐、8天开车，并成功申请到了为期3年的残疾人停车证。 ### [01:40:24](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6024s) 手术前的肌肉强化与术后物理治疗的重要性 在谈到膝盖手术的准备时，讲者分享了自己在家里做的简单康复训练。当膝盖感到僵硬时，他会把一张纸放在地上，将脚后跟在上面来回滚动20次，或者在坐着时做踢腿动作。他还会用弹力带套在腿上进行伸展。这些动作每次只需占用大约15分钟看电视的时间，就能有效强化膝盖周围的小肌肉群。他还提到有人送了他一个 "Bullworker"（一种等长收缩运动器材），他用它来做硬拉等训练。尽管他目前还不懂怎么更换上面的拉绳，但这些训练对术后恢复至关重要。 两位讲者一致认为，在进行手术前如果不去强化周围的微小肌肉，那是很不理智的。他们吐槽了许多做完膝盖手术却拒绝进行物理治疗（PT）的人，“他们不去做物理治疗，脑子到底有什么毛病？” 讲者分享道，他周四刚做完手术，周五下午从医院回到家，物理治疗师就已经上门敲门了。治疗师立刻开始带他练习上下楼梯、拄拐杖在外面散步，甚至模拟如何进出浴缸。尽管讲者家里只有步入式淋浴间而没有浴缸，但治疗师坚持带他把所有动作都练了一遍。 * **居家训练方法**：脚后跟在纸上滚动20次、坐姿踢腿、弹力带腿部伸展、使用 Bullworker 进行等长收缩硬拉。 * **术后恢复效率**：周四手术，周五下午物理治疗师即上门开始高强度康复训练（包含上下楼、户外散步、模拟进出浴缸）。 --- ### [01:41:52](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6112s) 医院卫生条件风波与术前麻醉的奇特经历 讲者对比了自己经历的几次手术，称这一次的医疗公司体验要好得多。上一次他在新泽西的一家名为 Sennate 的医疗网络机构做手术，虽然设施很好，但在手术前一天，他的针灸师提醒他要向医生询问医院的卫生状况。当讲者照做后，医生的反应有些含糊其辞，只说“总会听到些传言”。 令人意想不到的是，手术当天讲者已经被推进准备室、扎上了静脉注射（IV），正准备进行手术时，医生却突然走进来宣布取消手术，理由是他“不同意这家医院的卫生条件”，并决定下周换到另一家医院进行。这让讲者当时既愤怒又庆幸，因为大家都提醒他要小心该医院的耐甲氧西林金黄色葡萄球菌（MRSA）感染，而这种超级细菌“非常恐怖”。 在手术被叫停前，医生给讲者开了一颗20毫克的奥施康定（Oxycodone）作为术前预防措施，以防止患者在手术中途疼醒并歇斯底里地尖叫。讲者服药后完全忘记了这回事，结果药效发作后，他在一家中餐馆里对着一个叫吉诺（Gino）的人大喊大叫，整整“迷糊了8个小时”。 * **医疗机构**：新泽西的 Sennate 医疗网络。 * **术前突发事件**：因医生对医院卫生条件（担忧 MRSA 感染风险）不满，在术前最后一刻紧急取消，推迟至下周在另一家医院进行。 * **药物反应**：术前服用了20毫克的奥施康定（Oxycodone），导致讲者术后在中餐馆出现行为失控，药效持续影响达8小时。 --- ### [01:43:18](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6198s) 硬膜外麻醉的尴尬体验与脊髓神经消融术 随后，讲者心有余悸地描述了硬膜外麻醉（Epidural）的感受。他表示那几针非常难熬，因为其中一针的刺痛感直接传导到了他的阴囊部位。他幽默地形容那种感觉不是在“肉和土豆”（主要部位），而是更靠后、接近“消音器”（肛门附近）的位置，让他忍不住直呼“兄弟，这可不太妙”。 接着，另一位讲者提到了自己在网上看到的一种名为“神经消融术”（Nerve Ablation，具体为射频消融术）的技术。他好奇这种通过加热故意破坏传导疼痛信号的神经、以缓解关节炎或面关节退行性变引起的慢性腰痛的疗法，是否会影响身体运动，或者让背部伤势在毫无知觉的情况下恶化。他现场查阅了相关资料，发现该手术通常耗时30至60分钟，术后1至3周见效，疗效可维持6至12个月，且神经会随着时间推移重新生长。 他们还讨论了传统皮质类固醇（封闭针）的弊端。频繁注射皮质类固醇会降解肌腱，导致关节恶化，“很多人像傻瓜一样不停地打封闭，结果下一秒肩膀就废了”。讲者感叹，要不是因为自己过去大半辈子极度怕针，他可能也会走上弯路，但如今他已经对针头完全免疫了，笑称“现在你让我站着接受注射都没问题”。 * **技术名称**：针对慢性腰痛的射频消融术（Radiofrequency Ablation）。 * **技术参数**：成功率在 70% 至 85% 之间（成功定义为腰痛减轻 50% 以上），手术时间 30-60 分钟，缓解期 6-12 个月，神经会再生。 * **副作用对比**：过度注射皮质类固醇（Cortisone）会退化关节和肌腱，导致更严重的二次撕裂。 --- ### [01:47:26](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6446s) 腰痛拉伸、智能穿戴设备与血氧之谜 讲者指出，很多腰痛其实是因为身体肌肉太紧，只要通过拉伸或做瑜伽就能大大缓解。他们提到工作室里其实有一个可以加热到105华氏度的专业高温瑜伽房，但几乎从未使用过。讲者接着透露，自己术后恢复的一大秘诀是每周做两次高压氧舱（Hyperbaric chamber）治疗，这极大地帮助了伤口愈合。 然而，讲者也提出了一个长期困扰他的健康谜题：他每天早晨醒来时的血氧饱和度总是只有 85% 到 88% 之间，长期处于红色的危险区域。他曾开玩笑地想，缺氧是不是能帮他燃烧脂肪，因为“火需要氧气才能烧”。另一位讲者纠正了他的迷思，指出缺乏氧气根本无法彻底恢复身体，只有加强锻炼才能提升血液中的氧含量。 讲者表示医生也查不出低血氧的具体原因。为了获得更准确的数据，他不再将检测夹夹在手指上，而是夹在耳垂上，这个诀窍是他从一位资深的菲律宾老护士那里学来的。通过这种方式监测，他的血压达到了20年来的最佳状态。随后他们讨论了现在的可穿戴设备（如 Whoop 和 Garmin）已经能监测心率变异性（HRV）、呼吸率和血氧。但另一位讲者抱怨道，由于自己手臂上纹身太多，手表的LED光学测量系统无法穿透油墨，导致读数不准，他甚至动过把手表佩戴区域的纹身用激光清洗掉的念头。 * **恢复手段**：每周2次高压氧舱治疗。 * **异常指标**：晨起血氧在 85% - 88% 之间，原因未知。 * **测量技巧**：使用指夹式血氧仪夹在耳垂上，对讲者而言比夹在手指更精准。 * **技术限制**：纹身墨水会阻挡 Garmin 等可穿戴设备背部的光学传感器（LED光线），导致无法正常读取心率和血氧。 --- ### [01:51:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6681s) 偏方火烤灰指甲的离奇经历 讲者随后分享了一段多年前用偏方治疗灰指甲的荒诞经历。他因为在古巴旅行而感染了极其顽固的真菌，导致灰指甲和身上多处皮肤奇痒无比。他在团购网站 Groupon 上找到了一家位于影城（Studio City）的机构，对方声称可以通过“用喷灯（Blowtorch）高温烘烤6个疗程”来杀死真菌。 在治疗过程中，那位女技师不得不戴上厚厚的口罩。每当讲者故意摘下口罩向她提问时，女技师就不得不直面并吸入“真菌被烤焦时散发出的死尸般的恶臭”。虽然女技师每次治疗后都像逃离瘟疫一样夺门而出，且这个疗程最终毫无效果，但讲者对她手持喷灯的认真态度印象深刻。 他解释说，要根治这种深层真菌，通常需要服用非常烈、极度伤肝的药物。由于他之前的肝功能测试没有达标，医生拒绝为他开具那种口服抗真菌药，所以他至今有时还要自己动手打磨指甲，因为连中餐馆的修脚师都会被他的灰指甲吓坏。 * **感染源**：在古巴旅行时感染的深层真菌。 * **失败的疗法**：在 Studio City 进行的为期6周的 Groupon 喷灯高温真菌烘烤疗程。 * **医疗限制**：口服特效抗真菌药物因讲者肝功能测试未达标而无法使用。 --- ### [01:53:14](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6794s) 神奇迷幻菇与神经疾病的疗效 最后，话题转向了替代医学与精神类物质的奇特功效。讲者提到了一则新闻：一位因患阿尔茨海默症（老年痴呆症）而长期失语、丧失记忆的老妇人，在服用了5克裸盖菇素（Psilocybin，即迷幻蘑菇）后，竟然奇迹般地恢复了说话能力，甚至开始唱起了歌剧。 另一位讲者对此深表赞同，并举了两个关于口吃的例子。他的一位好朋友从小就有严重的口吃，但每次抽裂解可卡因（Crack）时，说话就会变得无比流畅。更具科学说服力的例子是著名真菌学家保罗·史塔曼兹（Paul Stamets，该节目的常客）。保罗小时候口吃非常严重，但在一次性摄入了10克迷幻蘑菇后，他的口吃症状彻底消失了。 讲者痛斥了那些至今仍抱有偏见、认为“蘑菇有毒会害死你”的人。他总结道，人的生命中偶尔需要“见一见魔鬼”。就像摄入四氢大麻酚（THC）一样，定期服用这些蘑菇能让人跳出固有的思维框架，“审视并评判自己的人生到底在搞什么鬼”。 * **案例 1**：阿尔茨海默症失语女患者服用 5 克裸盖菇素后恢复记忆并演唱歌剧。 * **案例 2**：真菌学家 Paul Stamets 少年时期通过一次性服用 10 克迷幻蘑菇，成功治愈了严重的口吃。 * **核心观点**：特定精神活性物质在适量使用时，具有重塑神经连接和自我审视的精神价值。 ### [01:54:13](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6853s) 迷幻蘑菇合法化与 1970 年法案的阴影 谈话在有些随意的氛围中展开，乔·罗根（Joe Rogan）注意到对方一边嚼着口口香（Zin）一边说话，两人随之调侃起牙龈大小的问题。接着，话题转入严肃的社会议题。罗根强烈主张迷幻蘑菇应当合法化，并提出了一个激进的财政方案：效仿科罗拉多州对大麻征收 39% 税率的成功经验，直接对蘑菇征收 100% 的重税。他断言，即使税率高达 100%，人们依然会买单，而这能为政府带来无法想象的巨额财政收入。尽管罗根一度认为这不会导致滥用，但他随即失笑承认，一旦合法，使用迷幻蘑菇的人绝对会变多，且“对每个人都有好处”。目前唯一阻碍人们的大概只有蘑菇糟糕的口感，因此大多数人会选择用研磨机将其打碎并装入胶囊服用。当被问及此前承诺购买土地种植蘑菇的计划时，罗根解释称这在联邦层面依然属于违法，不过当时特朗普正试图通过《迷幻药法案》（Psychedelics Act）来改变这一现状。 罗根将这一切的根源追溯到 1970 年尼克松政府颁布的《受控物质法案》（Controlled Substances Act）。他坚定地认为，如果当年没有通过这项法案，人类现在会生活在一个“ legitimate 更加美好的世界”，更多遭遇困境、背负心理障碍的人将有机会获得治愈。不过他也坦言，这种强效精神活性物质绝非人人皆宜。对于某些精神分裂症患者或心理极度脆弱、勉强支撑生活的人来说，“一次蘑菇之旅，一次与魔鬼的会面”就可能让他们彻底精神失常，再也无法恢复。但罗根强调，这和食物过敏是同一个道理，不能因为极少数人的极端反应就剥夺大众的权利。 --- ### [01:56:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=6981s) 疫苗、过敏科学与老派传统 话题从蘑菇过敏自然延伸到了日常的食物过敏。罗根提到有些人吃一颗巴西栗或花生就会丧命。当同伴询问每年因花生过敏死亡的具体人数时，搜寻出的数据显示全球及全美因食物过敏死亡的人数其实极少。罗根随后介绍了一项来自布莱特·韦恩斯坦（Brett Weinstein）的争议性假说，试图解释现代社会食物过敏率飙升的原因。该理论认为，这与接种疫苗有直接关联。疫苗中含有作为刺激物的铝（以前曾使用乙基汞和甲基汞等有毒重金属），其作用是激活免疫系统来对抗疫苗中的死病毒。韦恩斯坦猜测，如果在接种疫苗后不久立刻接触花生、小麦、麸质或动物等外界物质，高度亢奋的免疫系统可能会在对付死病毒的同时，错误地对这些日常物质产生抗体，从而诱发长期的过敏症。 听到这里，同伴忍不住用充满市井幽默的方式解构了这一现代病症。他笑称，如果回到当年新泽西州纽瓦克市（Newark），告诉那些刚移民过来的老派意大利祖父辈自己有“花生过敏”，老人家绝对会狠狠甩你几个耳光，并大喊：“乔，搞什么鬼？花生？”罗根笑着回应，自己的祖父虽不暴力，但绝对会无情地嘲笑这种事。在那个年代，对面包过敏简直是天方夜谭，祖父每隔两天就会去当地的意大利面包店买新鲜的意大利面包，那是全家唯一认同的食物。两人随即陷入了对童年饮食的怀旧，吐槽小时候长辈给的传统的厚切全麦面包简直是“狗屎”，当时他们只想吃像“普通人”一样的 Wonderbread 白面包，然而如今人到中年，两人的健康观念却完全调换了过来。 - **食物过敏致死数据**：全美每年因花生过敏死亡人数仅约 1 至 4 人，全美全食品过敏致死总数约 100 人。 - **历史法案背景**：1970 年尼克松政府颁布《受控物质法案》（Controlled Substances Act）。 - **疫苗成分探讨**：疫苗中包含死病毒及作为免疫刺激物的铝，历史上曾使用过乙基汞（Ethyl mercury）和甲基汞（Methyl mercury）。 --- ### [01:59:55](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7195s) 意式红酱、巨型贻贝与洛杉矶泰餐回忆 回忆起纽瓦克市的岁月，纸袋装的现烤面包、抹上黄油并蘸满浓郁意大利面红酱的传统吃法，让两人垂涎欲滴。同伴感叹那种美味简直让人疯狂，但他也无奈地承认，自己现在的身体已经无法再承受消灭一整条面包的碳水负担了。这也让他不得不放弃了自己最爱的菜肴——中等辣度的意式红酱贻贝（Muscles）。一谈到贻贝，两人的尺度便大了起来。同伴极力推荐一家名为 Rudy's 的餐厅，那里的贻贝个头大得惊人，他用极其粗俗暴烈、充满喜剧效果的黄暴比喻（“像六英尺高女人的……”、 “大猩猩养大的……”）来形容其肥美，称其他餐厅往往只给一堆小贻贝充数，而这家店直接端上九个淋满酱汁的巨型贻贝，令人欲罢不能。罗根也回忆起以前在洛杉矶 La Brea 大道 Tenth Planet 柔术馆旁的一家泰国餐厅，那里的辣味贻贝同样大得惊人。 不过，同伴对泰餐的记忆显然没那么美好，他回忆起有一晚被好莱坞知名柔术教练埃迪·布拉沃（Eddie Bravo）拉去请客，结果一进店就看到墙上爬满了蚂蚁，让他大倒胃口。不过罗根提到另一家位于 Sunset 大道、正对着漫画店的著名泰餐“Toy Thai”，那是一家进门需要脱鞋的硬核老店，同伴立刻赞同，称那里的虾酱（shrimp pate）堪称全国一绝。 --- ### [02:01:32](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7292s) 喜剧工坊风云：从 Greenblatt's 的蚂蚁到喜剧名店的黄金时代 顺着 Sunset 大道的回忆，两人聊到了紧邻著名喜剧俱乐部 Laugh Factory 的传奇深夜熟食店 Greenblatt's Deli。同伴分享了一段关于已故喜剧演员拉尔菲·梅（Ralphie May）的荒诞轶事：当时他与拉尔菲在店里吃烤牛肉三明治，同伴眼睁睁看着蚂蚁爬上了拉尔菲的手臂，拉尔菲掰开三明治一看，里面竟然密密麻麻全是蚂蚁。更讽刺的是，当他们叫来服务员投诉时，店家居然还要为拉尔菲已经吃掉的半个三明治收费，拉尔菲愤怒地拒绝买单。尽管卫生条件堪忧，他们承认 Greenblatt's 依然是个伟大的深夜据点。 罗根坦言自己其实只去过那家熟食店几次，因为在 2000 年代中期的某个节点，他彻底厌倦了 Laugh Factory 那种过于“刻板、精致”且充满功利心（许多演员纯粹为了拿电视合约而去表演）的氛围，从而将重心完全转移到了喜剧商店（The Comedy Store）和 The Improv。罗根深情地回忆起喜剧商店的独特魅力，那里拥有三个截然不同的表演生态：温馨私密、仅容纳 70 人的 Belly Room；充斥着粗粝感、由“精神病患”和硬核观众组成的深夜 11:30 的 Original Room；以及舞台宏大、天花板极高的 Main Room。同伴坦言自己后来有五年时间非常痛恨 Main Room，因为始终找不到征服那个大舞台的公式，但他对 Original Room 的钢琴、灯光以及如同在客厅表演般的凝聚感了如指掌。他们还开玩笑提起当年为喜剧大佬杰米（Jamie）试演时，杰米那充满标志性的古怪评价：“哥们儿，你在这里干嘛？你属于拉斯维加斯的豪华秀场，你根本不是个洛杉矶喜剧演员。” --- ### [02:04:18](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7458s) 纳什维尔重聚与迈阿密的疯狂往事 话题最终落在了喜剧人之间历久弥新的战友情谊上。同伴提到他最近去纳什维尔参加了喜剧节，并在著名的老奥普里剧院（Ryman Auditorium）进行了表演。在演出现场，他遇到了许多相识长达 25 年、来自 The Improv 的老朋友。大家聚在一起疯狂地互相爆料、追忆往事。他见到了定居纳什维尔、热衷于注射多肽（peptide）和养生的艾伦·哈特曼（Aaron Hartman），以及来自佛罗里达的乔尔（Joel）。重逢让他们感慨万千，二十年前大家正值青春，仿佛每天都在和剧场管理层“处于战争状态”，经常因为在台上脏话太多而被指责，甚至还聊起了当年因为误会和巴勃罗（Pablo）一起被开除的荒唐事（后来剧场老板发现他其实根本没吸食可卡因，心里十分内疚）。 同伴感叹道：“我们当年在一起时还只是孩子。”他清晰地记得 1998 年跨年夜（即 1999 年元旦前夕），乔尔在迈阿密 Coconut Grove 的 The Improv 俱乐部迎来职业生涯首秀的那个夜晚。那一晚，歌坛巨星麦当娜（Madonna）竟然和喜剧巨星克里斯·洛克（Chris Rock）一同现身观众席。罗根听闻不禁打趣道：“想象一下，在 1998 年，得是一个多么疯狂的生意人，才敢雇佣当年那个桀骜不驯的你。”他们一同回忆起迈阿密 Coconut Grove 剧场当年的疯狂氛围。演完戏的深夜，喜剧演员们会成群结队地前往一家通宵营业的新闻摊兼咖啡馆，喝着古巴咖啡、啃着古巴三明治一直闲聊到凌晨。那家店在早上 5 点到 6 点之间会停业一小时，但极具人情味的是，店家允许顾客把停业前点好的所有酒水留在桌上慢慢喝。于是在将近清晨 5 点时，这帮喜剧演员会一口气点上八杯啤酒，一边豪饮一边等待清晨 6 点店门再度开启，享受着属于那个时代的无拘无束。 - **经典演出场馆**：纳什维尔 Ryman Auditorium（老奥普里剧院）；洛杉矶喜剧商店（The Comedy Store）的三大舞台：Belly Room、Original Room、Main Room。 - **重要历史时刻**：1998 年跨年夜（New Year's Eve of 1999），麦当娜与克里斯·洛克共同现身迈阿密 Coconut Grove 俱乐部的演出现场。 ### [02:07:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7641s) 混乱的脱口秀之夜与喜剧人生的价值 两位讲述者回忆起1997年的一段荒诞往事。当时其中一人去纽约录制某档深夜脱口秀（可能是《柯南·奥布莱恩秀》），而恰好就在那个周末，他们的朋友哈特曼（Hartman）遭遇了枪击。留守的讲述者经历了一个极其疯狂的夜晚：他正卷入一场涉及一名微胖女孩和一名辣妹的“三人行”中，一边吸食着可卡因，一边试图在床上“大展身手”。荒谬的是，他当时转头对同伴说“快把电视调到NBC频道”，于是他便一边在床上“制服这两只野兽”，一边看着电视上的好兄弟上节目。他当时忍不住心想：“这他妈谁能信？”最后，那个微胖女孩觉得受了冷落，丢下一句“你反正也不想跟我在一起，你总是想要那个辣妹”，然后摔门而去。 尽管当年生活充满了毒品和混乱，但如今回首，他们充满了感慨。大家一起熬过了那段岁月，到了如今的人生阶段，还能围坐在一起聊当年的荒唐事，这种感觉极其美好。这段喜剧人生虽然充满坎坷，但绝对“值回了每一分钱”。当年刚入行时，谁也无法想象未来会过上这样一种虽然疯狂却极其有趣的独特生活。 - **事件背景**：事情发生在1997年8月左右，讲述者刚到洛杉矶不久，正值好朋友哈特曼（Hartman）遭遇枪击的那个周末。 - **深夜秀回忆**：一位讲述者前往纽约录制NBC的深夜谈话节目，另一位则在酒店里经历了一场荒诞的荒唐夜。 --- ### [02:09:44](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7784s) 洛杉矶早期的狂野岁月与即兴喜剧俱乐部的冲突 讲述者提到，另一位主持人曾在别的播客里评价他刚到洛杉矶时的样子——身穿皮夹克，整个人看起来狂野而“危险”。随后乔伊（Joey）分享了他刚到洛杉矶时在即兴喜剧俱乐部（Improv）的一段狠辣往事。那是他在欧文（Irvine）演出的第一个周末，他带着当时那位“牙齿很有特色”的疯狂前女友。俱乐部的黑人主厨走过来，当着两人的面轻浮地评价女方：“嘿，她的嘴长得跟吉娜·戴维斯（Geena Davis）一样，真是一张性感欠操的嘴。” 乔伊当时觉得被冒犯了，演出结束后便去找主厨对质。对方气焰嚣张地威胁道：“你想干嘛？你要是敢动我，你以后休想在即兴俱乐部混了。”乔伊二话没说，直接一记正前踢狠狠踹在主厨的肚子上，直接把对方踢得痛苦倒地、当场散架。虽然乔伊在开车回家时也曾自我反省，觉得自己应该走开，不该让“过去的那个暴躁乔伊”毁了前途，但现实是残酷的，在好莱坞一味退让只会被看扁。果不其然，俱乐部第二天打电话联系他，不仅没有封杀他，一年后反而因为他的血性而更加尊重他，给了他更多的工作机会。 - **肢体冲突**：乔伊在欧文的即兴喜剧俱乐部因为女友受到言语调戏，狠狠一脚将俱乐部的主厨踹倒。 - **后续结果**：调戏演出的主厨后来不再那里工作了；俱乐部不仅没有封杀乔伊，反而因为这次事件在日后给了他更多演出机会。 - **其他疯狂事迹**：乔伊提到自己刚在喜剧老店（The Store）混的时候同样狂野，曾用麦克风砸过别人的头；在拉霍亚（La Jolla）演出时，因为受到当地人的威胁，他还曾把台球桌上的球和球杆藏在各处当武器。 --- ### [02:11:53](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7913s) 《沉默的密码》与70年代功夫片热潮 聊到在拉霍亚台球厅的防身经历时，乔伊提到了查克·诺里斯（Chuck Norris）的经典电影《沉默的密码》（Code of Silence）。当时有几个家伙威胁要堵他，乔伊便效仿电影里的桥段，把台球藏在身上防身。当那些家伙开着车、拿着水枪试图挑衅时，乔伊使出浑身解数扔出台球，狠狠砸中对方的车，发出一声巨响，直接把对方吓跑了。两人由此展开了对动作电影的探讨。虽然如今回看《沉默的密码》里的打斗场景显得有些滑稽和过时，觉得主角一个人怎么可能打得过那么多人，但在当时，这算是一部非常严肃且受人尊重的卧底警察电影，而不是普通的爆米花动作片。 他们感叹于查克·诺里斯在那个时代的巨大影响力，他成功让无数美国人投身于马术和武术。乔伊自己就是因为查克·诺里斯才去学习了唐手道（Tang Soo Do）。在70年代，无数习武之人都渴望成为电影明星，但只有少数人成功了。那个时代充满了各种动作片，包括黑人剥削电影（Blaxploitation）《三条硬汉》（Three the Hard Way）。而在布鲁斯·李（李小龙）于1973年逝世后，武打电影市场更是彻底大开，甚至出现了很多粗制滥造的荒诞桥段（例如单臂刀客、把两吨重的黄金扔上山再跳上去接住等）。 - **提及电影**： - 《沉默的密码》（Code of Silence）：查克·诺里斯主演，丹尼斯·法里纳（Dennis Farina）在片中饰演其搭档，这也是他的早期作品之一。 - 《好汉带黑》（Good Guys Wear Black，1978年）。 - 《八角形》（The Octagon）。 - 《三条硬汉》（Three the Hard Way）：由吉姆·布朗（Jim Brown）和吉姆·凯利（Jim Kelly）等主演。 - **武术门派**：提及了唐手道（Tang Soo Do）、咏春功夫（Weing Chun Kung Fu）、柔道（Judo）以及来自法国的萨瓦特（Savate，踢拳术）。 --- ### [02:16:36](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=8196s) 从功夫热潮到综合格斗（UFC）的演变 讲述者指出，武术文化在过去几十年里经历了巨大的波次。李小龙带来了第一波世界性的功夫狂热，查克·诺里斯接过了第二棒。而第三波巨大的浪潮，毫无疑问是终极格斗冠军赛（UFC）的崛起。现在的文化已经彻底变了，几乎没人再去传统的道馆学习那些只让小孩子对着纸张练习击打的传统武术了，大家都在涌向巴西柔术（BJJ）和其他实战格斗学校。 当年柔术还没普及的时候，像他们的朋友、MMA播客主持人马特·塞拉（Matt Serra）为了学柔术，每个星期天不得不花三个小时从长岛一路开车到新泽西。而今天，街头巷尾到处都是柔术馆。这完全要归功于霍伊斯·格雷西（Royce Gracie）在早期UFC中的统治级表现，他让整个美国见识到了巴西柔术的威力。现在的年轻人不仅掌握了真正的格斗技巧，更重要的是学会了如何在街头“制衡”（Neutralize）对手，而不是盲目斗殴。 - **格斗文化的变迁**： - 第一波：李小龙（1973年去世前后的功夫狂热）。 - 第二波：查克·诺里斯（70-80年代的空手道/动作片电影）。 - 第三波：UFC与霍伊斯·格雷西（将巴西柔术带入大众视野）。 - **实战观念的转变**：现代学习柔术的人在街头遇到冲突时，往往会像俱乐部保镖一样将对手摔倒并压制住，警告对方保持冷静，从而在不伤人、不触犯法律的前提下化解危机。 --- ### [02:19:13](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=8353s) 马特·塞拉的赌场压制事件与生活的迷茫 主持人提到了马特·塞拉（Matt Serra）在网络上疯传的一段真实视频。当时在一家赌场的餐厅里，一个醉汉借酒撒疯、四处挑衅。作为前UFC世界冠军，马特·塞拉甚至都不需要拳脚相加，直接一个抱摔将醉汉放倒，然后顺理成章地骑乘（Mount）在对方身上。在等待保安和警察到来的过程中，塞拉全程显得轻松无比，甚至在笑。面对一个毫无还手之力的醉汉，他就这么气定神闲地压着对方，场面就像一个父亲在面对一个正在摔东西无理取闹的幼童，充满了极具戏剧性的反差感。 更搞笑的是，这个事件正好发生在马特·塞拉2018年入选UFC名人堂的前一天晚上。像他这种级别的世界冠军，在街头早已不需要向任何人证明自己的强大，他可以轻易踢碎对方的脸然后走人，但他选择用最温和、最安全的方式控制住局面。视频里他甚至轻松得像是在度假的游艇上一样，还招呼别人给他拿杯水。从这个醉汉的愚蠢行为，讲述者聊到了社会上的普遍现象：这个世界上有太多糊涂蛋，他们一辈子都在浑浑噩噩地混日子，永远无法把自己的生活理清楚。最后，乔伊顺着话题聊起了自己的一位在YouTube上做烹饪节目的朋友，因为母亲经常看她的节目，她不得不…… - **视频事件细节**： - **主角**：UFC前轻量级冠军、2018年UFC名人堂成员马特·塞拉（Matt Serra）。 - **时间与地点**：2018年，马特入选名人堂的前一晚，地点在一家赌场的餐厅里。 - **视频内容**：马特·塞拉用巴西柔术的骑乘位（Mount）将一名醉酒滋事的男子死死压在身下，全程大笑并控制对方双手，展现了极高的克制力与绝对的力量优势。 以下是根据录音文本第11部分整理的详细、生动的通俗演义式文稿： ### [02:21:14](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=8474s) 互联网的恶毒评论与手机成瘾的“序曲” 谈到网络环境时，主持人和嘉宾都显得颇为无奈与愤慨。一些生活博主经常遭遇莫名其妙、极为露骨且恶毒的口头攻击，诸如“让我看看你的胸”、“你根本不会做饭”等烂话层出不穷。这让许多创作者不堪重负，甚至不得不停播。一位年轻漂亮的女孩原本做着健身和烹饪的内容，最后被逼得只能选择“只跟猫一起玩”，因为只有拍猫才不会招来那么多恶毒的咒骂。大家感叹，互联网上的那群人简直就是“没有底线的野兽”，说出极其恶劣的话却不需要承担任何后果。这些人故意抛出耸人听闻的言论，纯粹是为了在评论区博人眼球，挑起别人的情绪反应。 接着，话题从网络恶评延伸到了更深层的社会现象。大家反思，如今每个人都对社交媒体和源源不断的内容疯狂成瘾，手机几乎长在了手里。这种现象在人类历史上是近20年才出现的新事物，而这很可能只是一个“序曲”。嘉宾分享了他昨晚看美剧《从》（From）时的感悟（该剧由《迷失》的原班人马打造，讲述人们被困在一个无法逃离的小镇的故事）。剧中人物没有手机可用，这让他突然意识到：我们对手机的极度依赖，其实是在为人类进入下一个“完全与电子设备融合”的生存阶段做准备。手机只是一道“大门”，未来某一天，人类甚至会开始怀念“居然还需要用手拿着手机、还要给它充电”的远古日子。与此同时，各地正在疯狂兴建巨大的数据中心，规模足有五个足球场那么大，甚至需要核反应堆来供电、消耗大量的淡水。这种反常的科技扩张，让大家都感到一丝困惑与恐惧：“我们到底在干什么？” ### [02:24:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=8661s) 垮掉的专注力与《疤面煞星》的古巴文化反思 科技对下一代的影响已经非常具象化。嘉宾吐槽说，自己的女儿现在连一部完整的电影都坐不住，看到40分钟就必须离开，剩下的得留到第二天看，“他们完全没有专注力了”。为了做点“家庭实验”，嘉宾曾带女儿看了一些经典老片，比如《搏击俱乐部》和《疤面煞星》（Scarface）。女儿总说，以前下楼时电视里老在放主角枪杀妹夫的那一幕，所以这次想从头到尾看一遍。结果嘉宾自己陪看了一场戏就觉得“实在看不下去了”而上楼休息，女儿则坚持熬夜看了下去。 好玩的是，两天后妻向嘉宾展示了女儿给《疤面煞星》写的影评。女儿在评语里写道，自己作为古巴裔美国人，一开始还挺自豪、挺喜欢的，但随着剧情推进，她发现“这些古巴男人根本不知道怎么尊重女性，整天不是扇耳光就是枪战”。女儿还吐槽说，虽然知道我爸是古巴人，但这片子里的古巴男人对女人也太狠了。嘉宾哭笑不得，纳闷自己在女儿眼里是不是也这副德行，女儿则开玩笑说“那倒没有，但那可是充斥着可卡因的疯狂年代”。嘉宾向她解释那都是40年前的电影了，而且片中角色都是当年被古巴驱逐出境的底层罪犯，根本代表不了正常的古巴人民。 ### [02:25:56](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=8756s) 古巴的生存危机与山雨欲来的军事阴谋 话题顺理成章地转入了古巴的现状。现在的古巴正处于极度艰难的境地，严重缺乏电力和汽油，甚至连基本的资源都无法维持。这背后的核心原因是地缘政治的绞杀——古巴过去一直依赖委内瑞拉的石油供应，但由于美国的介入和封锁，这条生命线被彻底掐断了。而俄罗斯虽然过去给予过大力援助，但后来觉得古巴失去利用价值便将其一脚踢开，如今两国只有少量的糖类等微薄贸易。 随后，两人口中透露出了一组惊人的2026年最新动态。根据媒体和学者的分析，特朗普政府于2026年5月20日正式起诉了古巴前总统劳尔·卡斯特罗（Fidel Castro的弟弟），罪名涉及1996年古巴海岸附近击落两架飞机并导致4人死亡的陈年旧案。拉丁美洲与美国外交政策历史学家指出，这起起诉绝非偶然，它与2026年1月美国针对委内瑞拉的行动如出一辙。美国在断绝委内瑞拉对古巴的石油输送后，又施加了极限的经济和军事压力，特朗普甚至在近期威胁要对古巴进行“友好接管”。主持人直言：“一旦他们起诉了你，那就是要动手的信号，只是时间问题。” ### [02:28:51](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=8931s) 枪支、洗脑与备战： island 的最后两星期？ 节目现场展示了更具爆炸性的新闻。2026年6月7日（周日）的消息显示，面对美国在古巴岛附近不断集结的军事力量，哈瓦那政府已经开始向普通平民分发武器，官方正式号召全体国民准备迎接随时可能发生的“外国武装入侵”。嘉宾大胆预测，古巴现政权可能“只剩最后两星期了”，美国随时会发动入侵并扶植新政权。主持人则一针见血地指出，在经济崩溃、民不聊生的情况下给饥饿的民众发枪，古巴政府简直是在冒极大的风险：“万一老百姓拿着这些枪直接把现政府推翻了呢？” 嘉宾还分享了自己家族的真实故事。当他在美国赚了钱过上好日子后，曾联系远在古巴的亲姐姐，表示愿意承担所有费用接她出来，甚至分给她一半的财产。但姐姐却拒绝了，甚至连去新泽西看看母亲墓地和老房子的邀请都无法接受。因为姐姐嫁给了一个“卡斯特罗手下的人”，且长期处于意识形态的灌输中，对美国充满抵触。岛上有一半的人都处于这种长期的精神洗脑下，每天听着大喇叭里播放着“同志们，我们快要赢得战争了”的政治口号。可实际上，民众的体重从170磅饿到了118磅，生活物资匮乏到难以想象。嘉宾提起福克斯体育《30 for 30》纪录片里的一个细节：当年古巴棒球名将“公爵”（El Duque）夺冠后，纽约的球迷兴奋地往场里扔卷纸，他的妻子赶紧一把抓过来说：“在古巴这玩意儿就是金子，你们为什么要扔掉它？”可见古巴的物资匮乏到了何种地步。 ### [02:33:12](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=9192s) 从1957年的“风月天堂”到拉斯维加斯的崛起 如果古巴政权真的垮台并重新开放，将会对美国的娱乐业产生深远冲击。两人谈到，美国资本其实早就在针对古巴重开赌博业进行秘密谈判和规划了。古巴原本拥有迷人的底蕴，那些老建筑和老爷车是它的灵魂。不过，古巴周边一英里内的海域在当年“猪湾事件”时被埋下了大量的触发式水雷和机关，重开此地绝非易事。 现场随后展示了一张1957年的古巴老照片。那是黑手党掌管古巴的黄金时代，画面里的人个个衣着考究、风度翩翩。在那个年代，古巴是美国人的风月天堂。那里的服务极度廉价，美国人花上区区几十美元就能在岛上享受到帝王般的纵欲生活。然而，卡斯特罗掀起的革命彻底终结了这一切，哈瓦那赌场的关闭直接引发了博彩业向美国西部大沙漠的“大逃亡”。一个鲜为人知的冷知识是：著名综合格斗选手弗兰克·米尔（Frank Mir，原名Miranda）的父亲当年就是古巴赌场的荷官，在古巴赌场被取缔后，他便直接前往拉斯维加斯谋生。可以说，正是古巴革命的爆发，才间接促成了今天拉斯维加斯的繁荣。 --- * **2026年5月20日最新动态**：特朗普政府以1996年击落两架飞机、导致4人死亡为由，正式起诉古巴前总统劳尔·卡斯特罗。 * **2026年6月7日紧急备战**：面对美军在附近海域的军事部署，古巴哈瓦那政府开始向平民分发武器，官方警告随时可能发生美国入侵。 * **古巴物资极度匮乏**：岛上经常遭遇大规模停电，缺乏汽油，由于长期封锁，连卫生纸在当地都属于极其珍贵的物资。 * **拉斯维加斯的古巴渊源**：1959年古巴革命后黑手党赌场被关闭，大批从业人员（包括拳击手弗兰克·米尔的父亲）流亡至拉斯维加斯，改写了内华达州的博彩历史。 ### [02:35:23](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=9323s) 古巴、黑帮与肯尼迪的恩怨 对话从前往古巴的便利性聊起。乔（Joe）和嘉宾开玩笑说，去古巴极其简单，航程只有三十分钟，就像去佛罗里达一样，甚至可以作为夫妻周末度假的选择。经过一番关于纽约到佛罗里达航程的推算（以前是两小时，现在因为特朗普在南部需要绕行变成了三小时），他们得出结论：从纽约飞古巴也就不到三个小时，基本和去拉斯维加斯差不多。古巴在他们眼中是一个充满度假村、与世隔绝的美丽岛屿。嘉宾提到他母亲曾告诉他，当年很多好莱坞明星都会去古巴隐居寻欢，尤其是洛克·赫德森（Rock Hudson）。那时候没有八卦媒体 TMZ，也没有记者追踪，而且一切都由黑帮控制，“到处都是罪恶和放纵”。 话题随后转向了古巴革命以及黑帮在其中的角色。嘉宾推荐了一本名为《夜行》（Nocturn / Havana Nocturne）的书，讲述了黑帮如何占领古巴又如何在革命中失去它的历史，其中牵涉到新泽西的联合市、纽约和迈阿密（后修正为坦帕）这三个城市的纠葛。乔提到，当时的黑帮曾帮助肯尼迪大选登台，希望他上任后能帮忙从菲德尔·卡斯特罗手中夺回古巴。然而，肯尼迪两兄弟在执政后却“反水”开始起诉黑帮，并且在“猪湾事件”的最后关头撤回了关键的空中支援，导致黑帮和中央情报局（CIA）的计划彻底流产。这让黑帮极其愤怒，断了他们的财路。 为了除掉卡斯特罗以重夺价值数百万美元的古巴业务，黑帮大佬如萨姆·吉安卡纳（Sam Giancana）和桑托·特拉菲坎特（Santo Trafficante）甚至被招募来协助使用毒药丸等手段暗杀卡斯特罗。当时罗伯特·肯尼迪也亲自领导了名为“猫鼬行动”（Operation Mongoose）的秘密政府项目，与 CIA 平行推进。嘉宾感叹，当时驱使这一切的纯粹是“无法追踪的巨额财富”，黑帮大佬迈耶·兰斯基（Meyer Lansky）那时在古巴每天吃着古巴菜，生活极其滋润。原本古巴人因为前独裁者巴蒂斯塔（Batista）同样糟糕，而对卡斯特罗抱有幻想，结果卡斯特罗掌权后倒向了共产主义，直接取缔并摧毁了所有赌场。这让意大利裔黑帮气疯了，他们撤回美国后每天盯着新闻，长年累月地期盼着有人能干掉卡斯特罗。 - **纽约至古巴航程**：少于三小时，与飞往拉斯维加斯的耗时相近。 - **提及的黑帮核心人物**：迈耶·兰斯基（Meyer Lansky）、萨姆·吉安卡纳（Sam Giancana）、桑托·特拉菲坎特（Santo Trafficante）。 - **历史历史事件与行动**：猪湾事件（Bay of Pigs）、猫鼬行动（Operation Mongoose），核心皆围绕除掉卡斯特罗并恢复黑帮在古巴的博彩帝国。 ### [02:40:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=9621s) 东海岸的美食狂热 嘉宾遗憾于当年没有留下更多影像资料，他回忆起母亲描述的 1950 年代古巴的意大利菜：那里的披萨上面竟然放了新鲜的海虾和龙虾。这导致他母亲后来根本看不上美国本土的披萨。聊到这里，两人开启了对东海岸（特别是新泽西和纽约）高热量美食的疯狂吐槽与赞美。现在的纽约披萨放鱿鱼，而新泽西的一些披萨店更是夸张到“在单片披萨上放一磅意式管面（Ziti）”，三明治店也同样内卷得厉害。 尽管西海岸也有不错的意大利三明治，但两人一致认为完全无法与东海岸白 plains 的 Giovanni's 店相提并论。乔提到 Giovanni 曾给他寄过两次巨大的包裹，里面的萨拉米香肠、干肉、奶酪和让人“愿意为之赴死”的饼干多到他不得不送走一半。嘉宾坦言自己因为害怕长胖，通常一周只吃一片披萨。但自从做完膝盖手术在家里录播客以来，他常从一家店点披萨招待朋友，大家都疯狂赞美那是“吃过最好的披萨”——饼底极薄、酱汁微甜、芝士加量且烤得恰到好处。他们赞叹只要一走进东海岸的意大利熟食店，那种芝士、橄榄混合的香味就让人无法自拔。 - **披萨风格特色**：50年代古巴披萨配有龙虾与海虾；现代新泽西披萨存在加入大量管面的夸张做法；嘉宾喜爱的披萨特点为薄底、甜味红酱（Sweet red sauce）及焦香。 - **推荐美食店**：位于白平原市（White Plains）的 Giovanni's 意大利熟食店。 ### [02:42:34](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=9754s) 餐厅趣事与尾声告别 顺着美食话题，嘉宾分享了自己最近在餐厅遭遇的倒霉事和他的新晋心头好。他之前常去一家叫 Elito 的地方（现已改为 Kovo Steakhouse 扒房），他曾连续三周带着大部队光顾。结果有天晚上接近九点时，他想进去点一份 14 盎司的牛排配啤酒，里面的员工明明还没下班且店里空无一人，却生硬地以“我们下班了”为由拒绝为他烹饪。嘉宾气愤地表示这地方以后绝不再去。不过，他现在找到了一家名为 Asteria 的新据点。 这家位于马尔（Mar）的 Asteria 餐厅深得嘉宾喜爱，因为主厨兼老板非常听取他的意见，甚至会让他抢先试吃新餐厅的菜品。主厨的特色菜包括“意式炒饭”（用意大利调味饭 Risotto 搭配龙虾和虾做成炒饭）、一份五个的龙虾肉酿面卷（Stuffed shells with lobster meat），以及用带有芝麻的粗粒小麦粉面包（Semolina bread）做的绝赞起司牛排三明治。乔看着照片也连连赞叹。 最后，两人决定结束这期漫长的节目。嘉宾顺便为自己接下来的行程打广告，他将于 8 月 7 日和 8 日在新泽西大西洋城的海洋赌场（Oceans Casino）登台演出，并调侃那是个“白人赌场”，甚至透露新泽西州长或政治人物米奇·谢里尔（Mikie Sherrill）可能会到场。他顺便吐槽了新泽西的政治生态，称共和党在那很难赢，杰克·奇塔雷利（Jack Ciattarelli）输了 40 万张选票，“自耶稣降生以来他们就一直是民主党”。在节目的最后几分钟，乔提到了嘉宾之前与杰克·加西亚（Jack Garcia，即卧底特工 Joe Pistone/Donnie Brasco）录制的播客。嘉宾由衷赞叹那个人是个彻底的狠角色，成功渗透进了博纳诺（Bonanno）黑帮家族深处，导致该家族至今一蹶不振。最离奇的是，黑帮分子在他身份曝光后甚至因为他出神入化的卧底技巧而对他产生了一种敬意。在充满温情与江湖气的“我爱你，兄弟”的告别声中，这期长达两个多小时的播客正式落下帷幕。 - **演出信息**：8月7日、8日于新泽西州大西洋城海洋赌场（Oceans Casino）；11月5日于芝加哥。 - **Asteria 餐厅特色菜**：龙虾虾仁意式炒饭、龙虾肉酿面卷、粗粒小麦面包起司牛排。 - **提及的播客嘉宾**：杰克·加西亚（Jack Garcia），曾化名 Donnie Brasco 成功渗透博纳诺黑帮家族的 FBI 传奇卧底。 ## Notable quotes > [16:45](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=1005s) 乔·罗根，我当时差点就下飞机了。我受不了，无法呼吸，我的心脏就像要闭合了一样，胸口紧得要命。墙壁在向我逼近，我觉得飞机要坠毁了，整个人彻底吓疯。我差点让他们把飞机开回去。但是，宝贝我回来了，再来两颗。 — Joey Diaz > [03:59](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=239s) 人类生来就不是为了拥有 300 磅的体重或跳过 30 英尺远。 — Al Alzado > [06:15](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=375s) 你为什么要给机器人送钱？为什么要支持机器人？！ — 流浪汉 > [03:59](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=239s) 黑科技 — Joe Rogan > [01:26:42](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=5202s) 词句都是狗屁，只要你知道角色是谁，你用18种不同的方式去骂人都可以。 — Joey Diaz > [41:40](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2500s) 老兄，你直接回家吧，我们再再也不想惹你了。 — 中途之家管理人员 > [01:12:30](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=4350s) 当我把车停在自家屋前，看着这栋房子，我甚至不知道里面住的是谁。这感觉太不真实了。 — Joey Diaz > [01:14:52](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=4492s) 我们不在喜剧生意里，我们在业力生意里。 — Joey Diaz > [02:01:40](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7300s) 哥们儿，你在这里干嘛？你属于拉斯维加斯的豪华秀场，你根本不是个洛杉矶喜剧演员。 — Jamie > [39:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=2361s) 如果你当时了解这些，你绝对不会让他们切开你的膝盖。那时候我甚至还害怕打针，结果我竟然选了膝关节置换，这太荒谬了。 — Joey Diaz > [53:42](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=3222s) 许多网络论坛建议在尿检前几小时将 Certo 与大容量运动饮料混合饮用……但医学研究表明，没有科学证据能证明水果果胶可以可靠地清除尿液中的药物或毒素。 — Joe Rogan > [01:56:41](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0&t=7001s) 乔，搞什么鬼？花生？ — 老派意大利移民 ## Mentioned Joe Rogan, Joey Diaz, Voltaren, DMSO, Perplexity, Al Alzado, Waymo, Uber, Yoel Romero, Ocean 酒店, Harrah's 酒店, Jimmy Hoffa, Teamsters, DraftKings, FanDuel, Ilia Topuria, Justin Gaethje, Alexander Volkanovski, Max Holloway, Charles Oliveira, Jai Herbert, Michael Johnson, Khabib, Marvin Hagler, Mustafa Hamsho, Ciryl Gane, Alex Pereira, Tom Aspinall, Anderson Silva, Travis Lutter, Kevin Holland, Ricardo Liborio, Chute Boxe, Minotauro Nogueira, Bob Sapp, Ricardo De La Riva, Eddie Bravo, Tucker Carlson, Ketone IQ, Gorilla Mind, Whoop, Garmin, Certo, Wizzinator, Bill Wise, JonBenét Ramsey, Kmart, Toys "R" Us, Radio Shack, Fox Theater, The Comedy Store, Richard Pryor, George Carlin, Paul Mooney, Houston Alexander, Keith Jardine, Marlon Brando, Robert Duvall, The Godfather, The Offer, Apocalypse Now, Al Ruddy, The Longest Yard, Daniel Rodriguez, Comedy Works, Bullworker, Sennate, Oxycodone, Paul Stamets, Controlled Substances Act, Brett Weinstein, Wonderbread, Rudy's, Tenth Planet, Toy Thai, Greenblatt's Deli, Laugh Factory, Ralphie May, The Improv, Ryman Auditorium, Aaron Hartman, Mikie Sherrill, Jack Ciattarelli, Jack Garcia, Donnie Brasco, Bonanno [Source](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oD13_3D8QY0)

[16:45] Joey Diaz: 乔·罗根，我当时差点就下飞机了。我受不了，无法呼吸，我的心脏就像要闭合了一样，胸口紧得要命。墙壁在向我逼近，我觉得飞机要坠毁了，整个人彻底吓疯。我差点让他们把飞机开回去。但是，宝贝我回来了，再来两颗。 [3:59] Al Alzado: 人类生来就不是为了拥有 300 磅的体重或跳过 30 英尺远。 [6:15] 流浪汉: 你为什么要给机器人送钱？为什么要支持机器人？！ [3:59] Joe Rogan: 黑科技 [86:42] Joey Diaz: 词句都是狗屁，只要你知道角色是谁，你用18种不同的方式去骂人都可以。 [41:40] 中途之家管理人员: 老兄，你直接回家吧，我们再再也不想惹你了。 [72:30] Joey Diaz: 当我把车停在自家屋前，看着这栋房子，我甚至不知道里面住的是谁。这感觉太不真实了。 [74:52] Joey Diaz: 我们不在喜剧生意里，我们在业力生意里。 [121:40] Jamie: 哥们儿，你在这里干嘛？你属于拉斯维加斯的豪华秀场，你根本不是个洛杉矶喜剧演员。 [39:21] Joey Diaz: 如果你当时了解这些，你绝对不会让他们切开你的膝盖。那时候我甚至还害怕打针，结果我竟然选了膝关节置换，这太荒谬了。 [53:42] Joe Rogan: 许多网络论坛建议在尿检前几小时将 Certo 与大容量运动饮料混合饮用……但医学研究表明，没有科学证据能证明水果果胶可以可靠地清除尿液中的药物或毒素。 [116:41] 老派意大利移民: 乔，搞什么鬼？花生？

[2:35] Lyle Alzado: 90% of athletes [6:30] Homeless man: Why you paying robots? [9:08] Homeless man: Who's this white motherfucker? [9:08] Homeless man: Hey, Mr. Football Man, why don't you break out a dollar for me? [73:11] quit before the miracle happens. [74:52] Joey Diaz: karma business [74:52] Joey Diaz: make somebody's day [80:00] Joey Diaz: vibe with the audience [86:42] Paul Mooney: Oh, that's right. I write, [ __ ] I write. [105:38] My problem with wearables is all these tattoos... It doesn't read through the tattoos very well. I have to like move it around to get... You can't read through the tattoos because the ink's in the way. It's literally using some sort of a visual system. It's like it's light. [155:23] sin and vice [159:20] Joey Diaz: no better than Castro [162:34] Joey Diaz: they've been Democrats since Jesus showed up.

[0:01] Joe Rogan podcast. Check it out. [0:03] >> The Joe Rogan Experience. [0:06] >> TRAIN BY DAY. JOE ROGAN PODCAST BY [0:08] NIGHT. All day. [0:12] >> All right, brother. Hey, what's [0:13] happening? What's going on? [0:15] >> Same [ __ ] Great to be here. [0:16] >> Great to see you. How you feeling? [0:17] >> My knee like a tiptop [ __ ] my goo. [0:19] >> Your knee. I can't believe you could [0:21] walk so quickly after getting the knee [0:23] fixed again. [0:24] >> It was like 3 days, man. [0:26] >> That's nuts. But yesterday I [ __ ] it [0:27] up at Newark airport because I wanted to [0:30] walk, [0:31] >> you know, but it was like like I walk [0:33] every day at the gym and then I walk my [0:35] neighborhood for breakfast and after [0:37] dinner. But that's a loop, [0:39] >> you know. This was 10 loops yesterday. [0:42] So, thank God I had a baggie with [0:44] edibles with me on the plane. I ate the [0:45] edibles and I put I asked the [ __ ] [0:48] flight attendant. She give me some ice [0:49] and that's how I got it down. Then I You [0:52] rub it with that bortto [ __ ] That [0:53] liquid cocaine juice. It's [0:55] >> what? [0:55] >> Yeah, it's a cream that [laughter] that [0:56] became illegal. You buy it over the [0:58] counter. [0:58] >> What is that? [0:59] >> It's Vora something. Vor, don't quote [1:02] me, man. [1:03] >> But it's a good cream. It numbs your [1:04] eye. You have to rub it though twice a [1:06] day and [1:06] >> Oh, yeah. [1:07] >> Yeah. But it's [ __ ] feels fantastic. [1:09] >> I've never heard of it. [1:10] >> Yeah. Voltron. Voltrax. [1:12] >> Vol. [1:12] >> Don't listen to me, dog. Just [laughter] [1:14] Google. What's that? Is that it? [1:16] Voltran. See, I'm [1:17] >> Volter. Arthritis pain. And you just rub [1:19] it on your knee. [1:20] >> Yeah. A couple times a day. Anything [1:21] that hurts. [1:23] What is it? [1:24] >> It's like a [ __ ] gel with cocaine [1:27] that takes care of the [laughter] [1:28] [ __ ] situation for you. [1:32] [snorts] [1:32] >> Prescription strength over-the-counter [1:34] non-steroidal anti-inflammatory that [1:37] penetrates the skin to relieve joint [1:38] pain, inflammation, and stiffness. [1:41] Interesting. I never heard of it before. [1:43] Widely used for osteoarthritis and [1:45] muscle aches. Should not be used for [1:46] acute injuries like simple strains or [1:48] bruises. [1:50] Wonder why. [1:52] Why can't you use it for strains or [1:54] bruises? [1:56] Does it say why? That seems weird. Cuz [1:59] like that's what people use um like [2:02] ibuprofen and [ __ ] for. Wonder why you [2:04] can't use [2:05] >> like I couldn't use any of that [ __ ] I [2:07] could only use Tylenol, whatever the [2:08] [ __ ] that is. I couldn't take ibuprofen [2:10] after the surgery. [2:11] >> No. [2:11] >> Have you ever used DMSO? [2:14] >> I don't know what that is, Joe. [2:15] >> That's this [ __ ] right here. [2:17] >> You rub it on? Yeah, they uh that's [2:20] another horse tranquilizer. Another [2:22] horse medication. [2:24] >> Yeah, they they use it in veterinary [2:25] applications, but it's a it's really [2:28] good for pain. For pain and injury, take [2:30] that. Keep it. [2:31] >> Okay. [2:32] >> No, I have a bunch of them. [2:32] >> Thank you. [2:33] >> I buy I buy [ __ ] in bulk. [2:35] >> We were talking about [snorts] La Zato. [2:37] >> Yeah, [2:37] >> that was the early steroids which were [2:40] the 70s. [2:41] >> We don't know what the [ __ ] we were [2:42] getting in the 70s. Everything came from [2:44] Germany. I think [2:44] >> I think they were getting [2:45] >> the Roblin all that [ __ ] I think they [2:48] were getting human growth hormone from [2:51] cadaavvers. See if that's true. Jamie, [2:54] put that into our AI sponsored [2:56] Perplexity. Did they used to get human [2:58] growth hormone from cadaavvers? I think [3:00] they did. I think that's how they used [3:02] to get it. [3:03] >> What do you get human growth hormone [3:05] from now? [3:06] >> That's a good question. Um, I don't [3:08] know. I don't know how they do it. It's [3:10] synthetic. I know it's synthetic. So it [3:13] must be they isolate the molecule, they [3:15] figure out how to reproduce it and then [3:17] they make it somehow. I have no idea. Um [3:22] but the way they used to do it back then [3:24] cadaavver derived human growth hormone [3:26] was real used mid 1900s to 1985 and [3:30] turned out to be dangerous because it [3:31] sometimes trans transmitted pron [3:34] diseases like kruxfel jacob yuckub and [3:38] is no longer used and has been fully [3:39] replaced by synthetic recombinant HDH. [3:42] So, uh, Crutzfeld Yuckup disease, that's [3:45] mad cow disease. It's the same kind of [3:47] disease. And what it comes from is it's [3:50] the same thing that cannibals get. When [3:52] people eat human brain tissue, they they [3:55] get and and neurons and that kind of [3:57] [ __ ] You get this same disease. Ala was [4:01] one of the first US sports figures to [4:02] admit using anabolic steroids in the [4:04] last year of his life as he battled [4:06] against the brain tumor which eventually [4:08] caused his death. Alzador asserted that [4:10] his steroid use abuse, his steroid abuse [4:13] directly led to his fatal illness. He [4:15] recounted his steroid abuse in an [4:17] article Sports Illustrated. I started [4:19] taking anabolic steroids in 69 and never [4:21] stopped. Now I'm sick and I'm scared. I [4:24] was addicting mentally. It was addicting [4:26] mentally and mentally addicting. 90% of [4:30] athletes I know are on the stuff. We're [4:31] not born to be 300 lb or jump 30 feet. I [4:35] became very violent on the field. Off it [4:37] too. I did things only crazy people do. [4:39] Once in 1979 in Denver, a guy sideswiped [4:42] my car. I chased him up and down the [4:44] hills through the neighborhoods. I did [4:45] that a lot. I chased a guy, pulling out [4:48] of his car, beat the hell out of him. [4:49] But look at me now. I wobble when I [4:51] walk. And sometimes I have to hold on to [4:53] somebody. You have to give me time to [4:55] answer questions because I have trouble [4:56] remembering things. [4:57] >> He died at 43. [4:59] >> 43 from cancer. [5:01] >> That's how old I am. [5:02] >> Wow. [5:03] >> He didn't look good at the end. Like he [5:05] wore the bandanas. Al Ela was Jewish. [5:08] >> Says he was inducted into the Jewish [5:10] Hall of Fame. [5:12] >> What did it say? Bo, go back to that [5:14] what I was just reading. [5:18] >> International Jewish [5:20] >> Jewish Sports Hall of Fame. I didn't [5:23] even know that existed. [5:26] >> Okay. Uh, so [5:28] I don't know if that was that stuff that [5:31] growth hormone did that, but [5:33] >> Well, listen, he's saying he can't walk [5:35] at the end. and they can't remember. [5:36] That's the [5:37] >> the knocks to the head and mixed with [5:39] whatever was going on. [5:40] >> Yeah. I mean, there's [5:41] >> with everything else, it becomes [5:42] something else. You know, [5:44] >> I lied. [5:46] >> A midst massive. That's one of those [5:48] lies that like everybody, you know, it's [5:50] like when bodybuilders say they're [5:51] natural. Like, shut the [ __ ] up, [ __ ] [5:54] Nobody's that big. Nobody's that big [5:56] without help. There's a bunch of goofy [5:58] guys out there that still try to claim [5:59] natural. Like, come on, son. [6:02] >> How many [ __ ] steaks do you eat a [6:04] day? like the Barbarian Brothers. 36 [6:06] eggs. [6:07] >> There's some guys that have freak [6:08] genetics. They have very unusual [6:10] genetics and they get real big [6:12] naturally, but that's rare. That's super [6:14] super rare. [6:15] >> As a matter of fact, I got [snorts] [6:16] picked up by an Ubie yesterday. Guess [6:18] who was the driver? [6:19] >> Who? [6:19] >> Yoel Romero's nephew. [6:21] >> No way. [6:21] >> And he's a judo champion. [6:23] >> No way. [6:23] >> We talked in Spanish for about 15 20 [6:25] minutes [6:25] >> in Jersey or here. [6:26] >> Right here. He lives cuz all these Uber [6:28] drivers are Cuban. [6:29] >> Really? [6:29] >> All of them in Austin. [6:30] >> They're all getting replaced by robots. [6:32] >> [ __ ] that. The Cubans. I saw a Cuban [6:34] yell at the robot a couple last time I [6:36] was here. [laughter] He got out of the [6:38] car yelling at the car and he realized [6:40] and he got back in the car. My bad. [6:43] >> That's hilarious. [6:43] >> The guy cut him off. [6:44] >> They cut you off all the time. It's [6:46] [ __ ] way up. [6:46] >> No, I stay away from those. [6:47] >> They get right in front of you. They're [6:48] They're ridiculous. [6:50] >> I don't trust those cars at all. And I [6:52] don't see how people sit I don't It's [6:54] not for me, brother. [6:55] >> Did you hear about that lady? She got [6:56] into one and a homeless guy was in the [6:58] back. [6:58] >> No. [6:59] >> Yeah. Some guy used the Whimo. He got [7:01] his luggage out, left the hatch open. [7:03] probably figured the the thing closed [7:05] itself. It didn't. Homeless guy hopped [7:07] in, shut the door. Lady gets the way mo. [7:09] There's a homeless guy in the back. He [7:10] starts yelling at her for paying robots. [7:13] Why you paying robots? [laughter] [7:16] I got to tell you about my homeless [7:17] situation this week, Joe. [7:19] >> Oh, no. [7:19] >> So, my daughter played at Egg Harbor [7:21] this weekend. It's like 25 minutes [7:23] outside of Atlantic City, which is an [7:25] hour and a half from my house. So, we [7:27] went down for Saturday's tournament. [7:29] They won. Now, we got two more games on [7:31] Sunday. So, we got a hotel. I didn't [7:34] want to get a hotel at Oceans. I'm going [7:35] to be at Oceans in August, but I didn't [7:37] want to get go there because all the [7:38] other parents were in [ __ ] uh Harris. [7:42] So, I said, "Fuck it. I don't want to be [7:43] that guy. Oh, I'll stay at Harris with [7:45] you." So, the game ended and my wife had [7:48] to drive the kids somewhere and I go, [7:49] "You know what?" Because every time, [7:50] every weekend when I go on those little [7:52] trips, I go to a weed store. Like last [7:54] week, I went into one in Trenton. Dog, [7:57] this was a block from the state capital. [7:59] You could see the dome. The black guy [8:01] called me back and he goes, "No, no, no. [8:03] I got a secret place in the back." He [8:04] had mushrooms. Mushroom chocolate. [8:07] >> Don't say this. You're gonna get in [8:08] trouble, [8:09] >> dog. There's 18 stores in [ __ ] uh you [8:12] know, you got to figure it out. I'm not [8:13] ratting nobody out. They know what's [8:14] going on. The cops. [8:16] >> They got a back I mean that packaged [8:17] mushrooms all different flavors. Blue [8:19] Hawaii whole thing. [8:21] >> This week I go to Atlantic City. I go to [8:23] this one Everel whatever. It's supposed [8:25] to be the big one. [8:26] >> The big one. [8:27] >> The big weed store in Atlantic City. And [8:29] it's right by the casino. So, as I pull [8:31] up, I park my car in front. As I walk [8:34] out, there's four yolked brothers. [8:36] Yolked with gold chains on in one of [8:38] those [ __ ] suburban millionaire cars. [8:41] What do you call the big truck [8:42] >> Escalades? [8:43] >> No, the other one. The the one that [8:45] looks like they're attacking your town. [8:46] Not the [8:46] >> Oh, AMG G Wagons. [8:48] >> I don't [ __ ] know. Anyway, they're in [8:50] there. They're in there bumping [ __ ] and [8:52] they see me and they go, "Yo, we know [8:54] you." And I go, "Yeah, what up, brother? [8:56] Hold on. I'll catch you on the way out." [8:57] I thought by the time I got out they [8:59] would leave. [9:00] >> Right. [9:00] >> So I went in, I come out and they're all [9:02] outside their cars. All four brothers. [9:05] Yo, big gold chains like, "Yo, you're [9:07] the [ __ ] that goes on Rogan." [9:09] No, that's the [ __ ] from the [9:11] longest yard. We looked you up. So [9:13] they're talking to me, talking to me. [9:15] We're rocking and rolling. Rogan [9:16] [snorts] the UFC. Yo, what do you think [9:19] about that? And I'm loving it. But in [9:20] the middle of all this, this black [9:22] little homeless crackhead walks his way [9:25] over and I could hear him ask the other [9:26] guy, "Who's this white motherfucker?" [9:29] And the black guy goes, "That's the dude [9:31] from The Longest Yard. You know the [9:33] football movie." The black guy comes [9:35] over and I see him. Walk right over. He [9:37] goes, "Hey, Mr. Football Man, why don't [9:39] you break out a dollar for me?" He just [9:41] bummed me out a dollar. I had to give [9:42] him 10. I was so [ __ ] embarrassed in [9:44] front of you break out a dollar for me. [9:46] >> Why don't you break out a dollar for me, [9:48] Mr. Football Star? I gave him a 10. This [9:51] [ __ ] ran. He walked up with a [9:52] limp, but he ran away. [9:54] >> Like, he was going right for crack. I'm [9:55] like, these [ __ ] they got a [9:57] game for everything. [9:58] >> I love it. I love all that [ __ ] Joe. [10:00] >> It's fun to be around wacky people every [10:02] now and then. [10:02] >> Just people living on the edge. [10:04] >> But that Atlantic City outside those [10:06] casinos, bro, that shit's real. [10:08] >> We saw a drug transaction right on the [10:10] street when we were down there last. [10:12] >> Bro, I'm surprised you didn't see a [10:13] hooker get mugged or something like [10:15] that. [laughter] [10:16] They are not [ __ ] around. I took a [10:18] ride Saturday night about 10. Just take [10:19] a little ride. [10:21] >> Sketchy, [10:21] >> bro. You make a ride in some of those [10:22] corners, you ain't coming back. [10:24] >> And I thought by now they'd at least [10:26] build up the outside of AC. [10:28] >> No, no, no, no, no, no. It's barely [10:30] making money. You know, a AC doesn't do [10:33] well. Not like Vegas does. You know what [10:35] I mean? Like AC's got some nice spots. [10:38] You can go there and have a good time, [10:39] but it's not like it's going to grow. [10:40] >> You go to Borgat with the Italians and [10:42] [ __ ] [10:42] >> The outside's too sketch. the Borgata. [10:44] All the Italians go down with their [10:46] white shoes on the week. Hey, it's got [10:48] old. What up? You know, [10:49] >> but no, they I don't like the Borgata [10:51] that much. I like the I like the couple [10:53] hotels down there. [10:53] >> There's some nice places. [10:54] >> Yeah, we stayed in the BA when it first [10:56] opened. You and I, you had a gig there. [10:58] You had a gig there. [10:58] >> That's right. The thing is, it's not [11:01] going to grow like Vegas is. You know, [11:04] Vegas is crazy. See, when Vegas had a [11:06] head start. The thing like if they tried [11:08] to make Vegas now, oo, tough cell. Tough [11:11] sell. Too many places to go. You can [11:13] gamble everywhere. You can gamble on [11:14] your phone now. But when Vegas was [11:16] first, there was no casinos in the [11:19] country, dog. It was just Vegas. And I [11:22] wonder if they made some sort of a deal. [11:25] Well, let them blow off atomic bombs. [11:27] They blow off these atomic bombs and [11:29] then we'll, you know, we'll put the [11:31] casinos in. [11:32] >> What's the difference? But then we [11:34] looked it up and it turned out they made [11:36] Vegas before the atomic bomb. [11:39] So I'm like, well, what? I guess it was [11:41] just gangsters. They just bribed people [11:44] or convinced people. There was nothing [11:45] going on there. [11:46] >> It was a pit stop. They opened up Vegas [11:48] for a pit stop for American soldiers to [11:50] stop on the way or something like that. [11:52] >> Well, was it in the 30s, right? Was it [11:55] the 30s, Jamie? [11:56] >> Then the guy that owned the comedy store [11:58] >> when Vegas was created. [12:00] >> Yeah. And the guy that owned the comedy [12:02] store, he was in charge of Vegas and he [12:04] robbed and they shot him. [12:05] >> Same guy as the comedy store. [12:06] >> Same guy as the comedy store. So [12:08] >> he was in charge. [12:08] >> He's [ __ ] genius. That [ __ ] that [12:10] [ __ ] was a genius. Well, he got [12:12] shot because he stole at the end the [12:14] expenses and [12:15] >> Oh, is that what it was? [12:16] >> The casinos, you know, he gave in those [12:19] days they borrowed money from the unions [12:21] in Chicago. [12:22] >> And then you borrowed that and you [12:24] worked off those uh teamster loans, [12:26] >> those Jimmy Hoffer loans. [12:28] >> Oh, yeah. [12:29] >> So, you had to build on those. Well, the [12:30] expenses never stopped, [12:32] >> right? [12:32] >> And they were like, "What the [ __ ] is [12:33] going on?" And he was hanging out with [12:35] Jane Seymour or something, going back [12:36] and forth like a millionaire, like a [12:38] movie star, and they ain't lagging. They [12:39] shot him. [12:40] >> That's why they shot him, [12:41] >> I think. So, they shot him in his house [12:42] in his eyeball or something. [12:43] >> Yeah. In his eyeball. [12:44] >> Something like that. I remember that. [12:46] So, [12:46] >> yeah, there's a picture of his dead body [12:48] allegedly online [12:48] >> in LA, right? They shot him in LA. [12:51] >> So, that was all because of the casinos. [12:53] Huh. [12:54] >> But then they made it, you know, it's [12:55] like when we first went to Denver. The [12:57] money was too good. [12:58] >> I don't give a [ __ ] if if it's Jesus and [13:00] his three disciples, they're going to [13:02] take that envelope. It's too good. [13:03] >> Well, you know what it was going on in [13:04] the beginning? They weren't allowed to [13:06] use credit cards, so everything had to [13:07] be cash. [13:08] >> Cash. Yeah. And it was crazy. So these [13:10] guys were leaving the [ __ ] and they [13:12] bring like six special forces guys with [13:15] them. They'd have [ __ ] green berets [13:16] and Navy Seals and [ __ ] like armed to [13:18] the tits because they're transferring [13:20] millions of dollars in cash. [13:23] >> So the whole thing was nuts, man. It was [13:26] nuts. I I read this story about the [13:28] dilemma like these people are making all [13:30] this money and the crazy thing is the [13:32] state was making all that money too [13:34] because the taxes on the legal weed. [13:38] Look this up, please. [13:38] >> It's amazing. [13:39] >> I think it was like 39%. [13:41] >> It's [ __ ] crazy. [13:42] >> And everybody was like, "Sure." [13:44] >> Like, you would never accept 39% on [13:46] alcohol. You never accept 39% on ground [13:49] beef. [13:49] >> No. [13:49] >> But 39% on weed. You're like, "I'll take [13:52] it." [13:52] >> During the pandemic in LA, you had to [13:54] buy an extra tax to go open. That's why [13:56] they called them uh what do they called [13:58] those businesses that had to be open? [14:00] >> Dispensaries. [14:01] >> No, no, no. They're businesses that they [14:02] had a purpose to be open during the [14:04] pandemic. [14:05] >> Oh, right. Essential. [14:06] >> Essentials. Yeah. They made that [14:08] essential, but they they charge an extra [14:10] t 10% tax. You know, [14:11] >> they're making so much money off weed in [14:13] California. [14:13] >> But now look at all the weed stores. [14:15] They're starting to close, [14:16] >> are they? [14:17] >> And in Jersey, they created a dilemma [14:19] because the state convinced them that [14:21] they had a build and all this [ __ ] So [14:23] all these places started, you know, you [14:25] you're opening up a shop minus 3 mil. [14:27] Listen, it's a lot of $20 bags to get [14:30] the three three mil. [14:32] >> A lot. And not only that, there's a lot [14:33] of competition. How many weed stores are [14:36] in LA? It's bananas, [14:37] >> bro. In Englishtown, New Jersey. There's [14:39] four of them. And here's where it gets [14:40] better. They're all on the same block. [14:42] >> Wow. Do you Did you ever go to that [14:44] place in Englewood with me back when it [14:46] was uh Only Medical? The Englewood? [14:48] >> We used to get the lollipops. Yeah. [14:49] >> Yes. Yeah. I went there one time with [14:51] you. [14:51] >> You know, the guy that ran that got [14:52] shot. [14:54] >> That dude that we used to deal with, he [14:55] got shot in that store. [14:57] >> They killed him. [14:58] >> No, I think he lived. Uh I'm not sure [15:01] though. Look that up. He might have [15:02] died. [15:03] >> Yeah. It's the first place you had the [15:04] lollipops from on Fear Factor. [15:06] >> Yes. [15:07] >> It was from that guy, right? [15:08] >> Yeah. Englewood Wellness Center. That [15:09] was in the '9s. That was in the days [15:12] where it was uh legal uh if you had a [15:15] medical reason. And any medical reason [15:17] would do. Oh, my feet hurt. Get in [15:19] there. [laughter] [15:20] >> Sign them up. [15:21] >> But anybody who does martial arts uh has [15:25] the pain excuse because everybody's in [15:28] pain and it does help you with pain. [15:30] There's a like if you could take [15:31] aspirin, THC, like gummies with CBD are [15:35] phenomenal for aches and pains, man. [15:38] >> You remember Dave Foley? [15:39] >> Yeah. [15:40] >> Dave Foley's hand, Of course you do. [15:42] Dave Foley's hand was all [ __ ] up from [15:44] arthritis. He started taking CBD and now [15:47] his hand is full function again. [15:49] >> CBD is amazing. [15:50] >> CBD's They just blew it up out of [15:52] content a couple years ago. [15:53] >> Well, who knows who's making it and what [15:55] the quality, right? But no, [15:57] >> that's the things when when things are [15:59] gray, you get a bunch of douchebags [16:01] making stuff. You know, I used to have a [16:02] bit about that about the gummy bears. [16:04] Like they're not making these gummy [16:06] bears in the same labs where they're [16:07] making Tylenol. They're very [16:08] inconsistent. You get one of them, you [16:11] swear it's a thousand milligrams and the [16:12] other one feels like it's like a 100. [16:14] They barely make sense. Back in the day, [16:16] back in, you know, when the it was the [16:18] wild west, [16:18] >> I got 500 milligrams in my pocket. They [16:21] feel [laughter] like 500 milligrams [16:23] whether you take [16:23] >> Well, now I don't think you could do [16:24] that anymore. I'm talking about like way [16:26] back in the day it was different because [16:29] way back in the day there was like it [16:30] was the wild west. [16:32] >> First of all, way back in the day they [16:33] didn't put warnings on this [ __ ] No. [16:35] >> You didn't know how many milligrams were [16:36] in this stuff. And I remember eating a [16:38] brownie one time and flying up to [16:39] Pittsburgh and the red eye and my leg [16:41] wouldn't stop tapping. Like [laughter] [16:43] it wouldn't stop [ __ ] tapping. [16:45] >> I remember one time we were on a plane. [16:46] You had a panic attack and then you [16:49] waited like an hour later and then [16:51] popped two more. [laughter] [16:52] >> [ __ ] yeah. I was like, "How are you [16:54] doing that?" You're like, "Joe Rogan, I [16:56] almost got off the plane. I couldn't [16:58] take it. I couldn't breathe. My [ __ ] [17:00] heart was closing. It was like my chest [17:02] was closing in on me. The walls were [17:04] closing in. I thought the plane was [17:05] going to crash. I was freaking out. I [17:07] almost had turn the [ __ ] plane [17:08] around. [17:09] >> But I'm back, baby. Two more." [17:11] >> You have no idea what I put myself [17:13] through over the years. [17:14] >> Why do you do that? [17:15] >> Because I just want to take a chance. [17:16] Columbus did. I mean, [laughter] [17:18] I'm sitting at home. It's 2:00 in the [17:20] afternoon. You're bored as [ __ ] be like [17:23] the devil. [17:23] >> Let's see what happens. And the only [17:25] thing that would hold me back is if I [17:26] had a spot that night. [17:27] >> Oh, yeah. [17:28] >> Then I would tame it and be like a [17:30] couple hundred milligrams. But [17:31] >> you don't want to go up on stage with [17:33] too much edible. [17:34] >> Yes, you do. [17:35] >> Sometimes. Yes, you do. Sometimes you [17:37] need to. [17:38] >> It's important. Sometimes. This episode [17:40] is brought to you by Blue Chew. Listen [17:43] up. Bluechu just dropped something wild. [17:46] They're calling it Blue Chew Gold. And [17:48] honestly, the name fits. stuff is [17:50] setting a whole new standard for [17:53] performance in the bedroom. It's not [17:55] your typical blue pill. It combines two [17:58] ingredients for blood flow with two for [18:01] mental arousal and connection. It's not [18:05] just physical. It's the mindset, too. [18:07] Bluechu gets it. Sex is not just about [18:10] being able to perform. It's about [18:12] actually wanting to. And I've got a [18:14] special deal for you listeners right [18:16] now. When you buy two months of Blue [18:18] Chew Gold, you get the third free with [18:21] the promo code Rogan. You'll also [18:24] receive an additional 10% off plus free [18:27] overnight shipping on your first order. [18:29] Visit bluechw.com for more details and [18:32] important safety information. Sometimes [18:35] it's important to go off into the woods, [18:36] right? Yeah. Sometimes you should stay [18:38] on the trail. [18:38] >> Yeah. But listen, [18:39] >> you filming a special, stay on the [18:41] trail. [18:41] >> Last week I went to do a spot. I [18:42] figured, let me wait five weeks. I [18:44] haven't been on stage since April 18th. [18:46] Let me go do a spot. I'm nervous. I get [18:49] down there and there's 50 people. [18:51] Perfect. Break my cherry. Do it. [18:55] I got into such a groove. I ended up [18:56] doing an hour. That was because the [18:58] edible I took before I went on stage. No [19:00] material. I told you that I got nothing. [19:02] >> Right. [19:02] >> That's it. I'm starting over from [19:04] scratch. [19:04] >> Got nothing. I talked about going to the [19:06] hospital and then it just became [19:08] something else. And at the end, I was up [19:10] there an hour. [19:10] >> Wow. Wow. My leg was starting to [ __ ] [19:12] throb. But [19:13] >> did you film it or record or anything? [19:14] >> No, I just I didn't know it was going to [19:16] be gold. I just [19:17] >> Right. Right. [19:18] >> But that's why THC somebody said THC is [19:22] like a a band substance for comics [19:25] because it make if you really let it [19:27] absorb you and I'm not telling you to [19:29] smoke pop, but that I had an audition. [19:31] Whenever I have an audition, I read it. [19:33] I put it away. I get stoned. And then I [19:36] go back and I look at it again. Complete [19:38] different sheet. Now I can pick out [19:41] things. Now I could point. [19:42] >> Then I leave it again. I get high and I [19:44] come back like an hour later. And that's [19:47] what I think THC makes me just relax. [19:49] Look, look, I live in anxiety naturally. [19:52] Naturally. I beat myself up. This [19:55] morning it's 8:30. I'm drinking coffee [19:56] outside the four seasons. I'm like, why [19:58] am I thought I had somewhere to go, [20:01] >> dude? [20:02] >> I got nowhere to go. [20:03] >> You just gave yourself an anxiety for no [20:04] reason. [20:05] >> Yeah, cuz I always think I got somewhere [20:06] to [ __ ] go at 10:00 in the morning. [20:08] That's why when my daughter gets on that [20:09] bus to school at 7:15, I start blasting [20:12] [laughter] [20:13] >> because then I know I ain't got nowhere [20:15] to go. Like, you know, you make a list [20:16] every day and you go, "This is what I'm [20:18] going to do today." [20:19] >> And then you [ __ ] uh, you know, [20:22] >> wake up and you look at that list after [20:24] you smoke and you're like, [20:25] >> "That's a long drive up to New York City [20:27] today. I ain't doing that podcast." You [20:29] know, [laughter] [20:31] that's a [ __ ] long drive up into that [20:34] [ __ ] [20:35] >> Yeah. The driving in New York is not a [20:37] joke. That's an endeavor. [20:38] >> Yeah. No, [20:39] >> you got you got to take a day. Like [20:40] that's your day. Your day is driving in [20:42] and driving out. You're not going to the [20:44] gym. You're not doing all that other [20:45] stuff like No, I'm saying if you if got [20:47] to drive into New Jersey, that's your [20:49] day. It's not like, "Oh, I'll go there. [20:52] That's at noon. I'll hit the gym at [20:54] 2:30." Uh-uh. No, you won't. You'll be [20:56] in traffic for 3 hours. [20:57] >> For 3 hours. [20:59] >> I always go to do that [ __ ] early and [21:00] get it over with. And uh like on days [21:02] that I have to go to the city up north, [21:05] I'll just take that as a day off. Like [21:07] I'll work that day before so I could go [21:09] up there comfortably and not sweat it. [21:11] >> Yeah. [21:11] >> But it's got some days I get up and I'm [21:13] like, I'm not going up there. I got to [21:14] work out today. [21:15] >> Listen, this is one of the big things [21:17] that Texas has or Austin has in [21:19] particular over the East Coast is the [21:22] [ __ ] traffic. The traffic here is a [21:24] joke. They talk about traffic. It's [21:26] adorable. You might be 10 extra minutes. [21:29] >> Whoopde-doo. It's adorable. Occasionally [21:32] a car accident happens and there's a [21:34] bunch of people stopped. That [ __ ] [21:36] happens everywhere in the world. But for [21:38] the most part, the East Coast is so [21:41] thick with people. You don't realize it [21:44] until you have to make that trip to New [21:46] Jersey and back and forth. You know, [21:49] when we do uh the UFC's, if we go into [21:52] New Jersey uh to the UFC and then with [21:54] the weigh-ins, then we have to go back [21:55] to New York to play pool [21:56] >> at 6:00. That's pool. Oh my god, it's [22:00] crazy. Go to New York to eat and to play [22:01] pool and it's [ __ ] it's a mad house. [22:04] >> Think about it. What it was like the [22:05] last two weeks. Jim Florentine said he [22:08] went into the city Saturday was 3 hours [22:11] because of the Nick [ __ ] They [22:12] weren't even playing. [22:14] >> They weren't even playing. [22:16] >> People were so upset that Trump was [22:17] going to go to the NBA because if he's [22:20] there then they have all these crazy [22:22] security protocols. It makes the traffic [22:24] even worse. [22:25] >> There was no parties. There was no [22:27] nothing. He should stick to the UFC. [22:29] They're going to boo him everywhere [22:30] else. [22:30] >> Oh, they booed him to I didn't watch the [22:32] whole game. I was out. [22:33] >> Some people cheered. I heard it was like [22:34] cheers and booze, but the problem is [22:37] >> if there's cheers and any booze there if [22:40] there's like 50/50 like that's that's [22:43] don't go to that spot. Go to the UFC. [22:46] People say he got booed at the UFC. I've [22:48] seen him at the UFC [22:50] six times or something like that. I [22:51] don't know how many times. Never get [22:53] booed. [22:53] >> They love him. [22:54] >> He's never gotten booed. They [ __ ] [22:55] cheer. The people that say they're [22:57] booing him, you're distorting reality. [22:59] It's not true. They cheer him like he he [23:02] walks in there to the American badass [23:03] song. Especially if Kid Rock is with him [23:06] and Dana White's behind him and then [23:08] sometimes Tucker Carlson was there too [23:10] back on when they were close. It was [23:12] like the conservative Avengers. It was [23:14] like this is ridiculous. They [23:16] >> He was the kiss of death last night. I [23:17] bet against the Knicks last night. Me [23:18] and Jamie, we were like, "Fuck that. [23:21] Getting two and a half. [23:22] >> Why they only giving two and a half? [23:23] They're up two games. What are you a [23:25] [ __ ] [23:26] >> Two and a half. They were given last [23:28] night. Everybody in their mother, even [23:29] [ __ ] your daughter bet the Knicks [23:31] last night giving two and a half. [23:33] >> Do you um bet sports all the time? [23:36] >> How often you bet [snorts] [23:38] >> this type of the year? I bet basketball [23:40] because it's real. There's defense. [23:42] >> Do you use uh do you use an app? Like [23:44] what do you do? Draftings. DraftKings. [23:45] You do it on DraftKings. [23:46] >> Everything is on DraftKings. [23:47] >> All right. You don't have a bookie? [23:49] >> No. [23:50] >> Yeah. [23:50] >> No. I enjoy because DraftKings has so [23:53] many fun. Like there's bookies out [23:54] there. Like they just keep busting these [23:56] mafia rings in Jersey and New York. 39 [23:59] people. They had the big bust last year [24:00] with the basketball coaches that they [24:03] put the cards up and you could see [24:04] through the [ __ ] cards on the table. [24:06] It's a it's gambling has grown to a [24:09] [ __ ] nightmare. We're going to pay [24:11] for this in 5 years. But when I went to [24:13] college after orientation, you walked [24:16] out and there was credit card companies, [24:17] Discover, Mastercard, Visa, and they [24:20] give you a credit card for being a [24:22] student for 250 automatic right there. [24:25] And that now when you go to those [24:27] orientation days, DraftKings is there. [24:29] >> You know, the other ones, FanDuel's [24:31] there, and I'm not putting them down. I [24:32] love DraftKings, but you're coping these [24:35] kids. These kids don't have enough [24:36] problems with [ __ ] student loans [24:38] >> right [24:39] >> now. I'm going to put a [ __ ] thing. [24:41] More people are gambling more than ever. [24:43] >> Than ever than ever. [24:44] >> In Australia, too. My buddy McCann, you [24:47] know, James McCann. Yeah. He was talking [24:48] about how crazy it is in Australia. [24:51] >> Yeah. It's uh it's in What is those? [24:53] What's the odds on the Ilia Taporia [24:56] Justin Gatey fight at the White House? [24:59] >> To pick them, is it? No. No. Tapora has [25:03] to be a huge favorite. I guarantee [25:06] Tapora is two to one. [25:08] >> Four to one. [25:08] >> Four to one. Yeah. Oh my god. [25:11] >> Four to one's crazy. Two to one. [25:14] If you just think about what he's done [25:16] in his last three fights, he's had the [25:18] most legendary run in MMA championship [25:21] history. In his last three fights, he [25:22] knocked out three all-time greats. [25:25] Knocks out Alexander Vulcganowski, [25:28] knocks out Max Holloway, knocks out [25:31] Charles Olivivera. Three in a row. Like, [25:33] anybody who could do that, you go, I'm [25:35] not [ __ ] betting anything against [25:37] that guy. But Justin Gachi is a tough [25:41] character, son. [25:43] >> So if I bet 25 bucks on Gage, I win [25:47] >> 100 [25:48] >> 100. 4 to one. [25:49] >> Four to one. Yeah. Um which is uh Look, [25:53] it's minus 426 for Toporia. They're like [25:56] 4 to1 is not enough. [25:57] >> Caesar says 600. [25:58] >> Caesar says 600. Caesars is smart. [26:02] [laughter] [26:03] But the thing is, man, don't think that [26:05] Justin Gai can't win. Like anybody can [26:08] lose in an MMA fight. People get hit. [26:11] Like in Iliot Aoria, one of his early [26:13] fights, one of I think his first fight [26:15] in the UFC at lightweight, he took it on [26:16] short notice and he fought this dude um [26:20] Jai Herbert who's a really tall, really [26:23] good striker. And Jai Herbert caught him [26:26] with a head kick in the first round, a [26:28] switch kick to the dome that dropped [26:30] him. It was perfect, but he recovered [26:33] brilliant. He got a hold of him, took [26:35] him to the ground, recovered, and then [26:37] came back and devastating knockout in [26:40] the second round. Like, he [ __ ] puts [26:43] people into orbit, man. His power is [26:46] crazy. He's not a big guy either, man. [26:48] Justin's a much bigger guy than him, but [26:51] the way he knocks guys out, it's just [26:53] dead. He knocks them out dead. But so [26:56] does Gachi. People forget it. Gachi is a [27:00] [ __ ] Warhammer, dude. That guy loves [27:03] battles. He loves [27:04] >> saying this is not I don't think [27:06] >> it's a tough fight, man. [27:07] >> This is a tough [ __ ] fight. I could [27:08] both this and this is this Sunday, [27:10] right? Correct. [27:10] >> It's this Sunday. Gachi's bigger. So, [27:13] [ __ ] yeah. I'm going. So, Gachi's [27:15] bigger. Gatechi used to fight um at um [27:19] what was it called? The IFL. Was it [27:22] whatever the organization was before the [27:24] he came to the UFC? I think it was it [27:27] was before the PFL. It was like another [27:29] one. But what was it? What did he What [27:32] was the organiz You know, there's these [27:34] feeder organizations like the PFL. A lot [27:36] of really good fighters that wind up [27:38] becoming champions start out there. [27:41] >> Was that it? [27:42] >> World Series of Fighting. That's right. [27:43] That's what it was. And I mean, he was [27:46] [ __ ] people up with leg kicks. But it [27:48] was the way he was fighting would just [27:50] throw himself into chaos. [27:53] >> Like he he didn't fight tactically at [27:55] all back then. [27:56] >> No. like the you ever see the Michael [27:58] Johnson fight with him in the UFC. [28:00] >> It's his first fight in the UFC. It's [28:02] one of the craziest [ __ ] fights ever [28:04] because he just [ __ ] throws himself [28:07] at Michael Johnson and Michael Johnson [28:10] throws himself right back. I It was a [28:12] They got hurt. Both guys got cracked. It [28:14] was a crazy fight, but eventually Justin [28:17] got him. But it was the way he fought [28:19] you like good lord. [28:20] >> Yeah, he fights [28:21] >> like a pitbull. [clears throat] Like a [28:22] pitbull. Like no concern for his safety. [28:24] Just dive in. It was a [ __ ] crazy [28:27] fight. And look how Dustin is always [28:30] just trying to kill you. He's always [28:32] move. Look at that. Every shot he's [28:33] trying to [ __ ] kill you. He's always [28:35] moving forward trying to smash you. And [28:38] the thing is he relishes this kind of [28:40] combat so much that in the beginning he [28:43] lost some fights that he could have won [28:45] if he tempered it. If and then he did. [28:48] So, and then when he went on this like [28:50] legendary run, started beating [28:51] everybody. It's really because he [28:54] controlled the violence a little bit [28:55] more. He controlled the chaos, but it [28:58] was still like very technical violence. [29:00] It wasn't like he was brawling dumb. He [29:04] was just forcing himself into chaos so [29:06] much. He was throwing himself right into [29:08] the fire over and over and over again. [29:11] This is a dangerous [ __ ] guy. He's a [29:14] dangerous [ __ ] guy for anybody. [29:17] >> I mean, he had hit Kabib. He hurt him [29:19] with some calf kicks. [29:20] >> His He could do that, too. He leg kicks [29:22] you from inside the clinch. One of the [29:25] things that he does really well is from [29:27] like he could get you with like a collar [29:29] tie and he's leg kicking you. Look, he [29:31] gives him the finger and tells him to [29:32] get up. I mean, Michael Johnson's [29:33] getting battered. This is a tough fight [29:35] for him at this point. We're in round [29:37] two. Look at that knee to the body. [29:40] Just everything's trying to kill you. [29:42] It's not like uh this tactical [29:46] take a chance here, take a chance there. [29:48] No, everything's take a chance. It's [29:49] like from the very beginning of the [29:51] fight and this is how he fight. He [29:52] eventually took him out. But it was a [29:54] crazy fight. [29:55] >> He fights like I told you Haggler used [29:57] to fight. They weren't thinking about [29:59] brain damage, [30:00] >> right? [30:00] >> Haggler, all those dudes were not [30:02] thinking about that. We were talking [30:04] about that with with football before. [30:06] >> You know what I just watched the other [30:07] day? Mustafa Ham Show. Haggler versus [30:10] Mustafa Ham Show. [30:11] >> Did they battle? [30:13] >> Haggler took him out. But it was just [30:15] Haggler in his prime. He was beautiful [30:18] at that, bro. He was so [ __ ] so good. [30:21] He was so good. And he was so good at [30:23] switching stances, man. When no one was [30:25] doing that back then. Haggler would [30:27] fight southpaw. He would fight Orthodox. [30:29] He would [ __ ] you up. You didn't know [30:30] where it was coming from. And he could [30:32] fight just as good Southpaw as he could [30:34] Orthodox. It was amazing. It was an [30:36] amazing fight to watch. Like, god, that [30:38] guy was great. So disciplined. [30:41] >> Yeah. Some good fights this week. I'm [30:43] excited for the car. I thought it was [30:44] Saturday. [30:45] >> Yeah. Amy posted up that the serial gun [30:47] Alex Pereira fight is the closest fight [30:49] in the card is in terms of odds. It's [30:51] like even odds and that's a that's a [30:55] serial gun's a tall order. That's a tall [30:57] order for your first heavyweight fight [30:59] in the UFC. [30:59] >> Caesar says that as a pickum. [31:01] >> A pickum. Yeah, I would say it's a pick [31:03] them. I would say it's a pickham. Um [31:06] Sirill Gan is really good. And the thing [31:08] about Sirill Gan is the problems that [31:11] he's had in fights or when guys take him [31:13] down. when guys stand with him, he is [31:16] very tricky. He's very slick. He's very [31:20] technical and he's he's very light on [31:22] his feet for a big guy. Like he moves [31:25] really well. Like one of the best movers [31:27] in the heavyweight division for sure. [31:29] He's he's like he dances on his feet. He [31:31] also does a weird thing off his front [31:33] leg. He throws a front kick when he's [31:36] standing sideways like in a bladed [31:38] stance like this and he picks it up and [31:41] twists it into your stomach. Bang. Like [31:43] that. It's weird. Like it works. Oh, no. [31:46] It's a kick. I mean, it's called a [31:48] twisting kick. Twisting kick. [31:49] >> It's just you don't ever see people [31:52] throwing that kick from the front leg [31:53] like he does. Like, he does a lot of [31:56] >> he does a lot of weird [ __ ] that you [31:58] have to get used to. Like that Tom [32:00] Aspenol fight, man. He was he was [32:02] scoring very well on the feet. And I [32:04] know it got stopped because of the eye [32:05] pokes, but before the eye poke, Sirill [32:07] Gan was doing very well on the feed [32:09] against Aspenol. And Aspenol is a big [32:11] fast heavyweight. [32:13] It's going to be interesting because I [32:15] don't I don't you know know if Pereira [32:18] is going to have an issue with the [32:19] movement, you know, if he's going to be [32:21] able to shut that movement down and I [32:22] don't know if Sirill Gan is going to be [32:24] able to like if he's going to want [32:26] exchange with him. He might feel that [32:28] power and say I'm just going to fight on [32:30] the outside cuz Pereira's got that you [32:32] make one mistake power. [32:35] >> He looks good at heavyweight. [32:36] >> He looks like he gained the weight. He [32:38] looks yolked. [32:39] >> He's he's huge. And on top of that, no [32:41] dieting. So no depleting of his body at [32:44] all. You're going to have a guy [32:46] competing for the first time where he's [32:49] never had to cut weight. That's huge. [32:53] That's a giant advantage. Not having to [32:55] cut weight is like they let you take [32:56] steroids. You can't you don't have to [32:58] cut weight. No cutting weight at all. If [33:00] they changed weight cutting, if they cut [33:02] all weight cutting out of MMA, you'd [33:04] have like 20% better performances. [33:07] people would be fighting so much better [33:09] because they would they would feel so [33:10] much healthier. They would be so much [33:12] more durable. There wouldn't be as many [33:13] like one-shot knockouts where you're [33:15] like, "Whoa, that got them." Because a [33:17] lot of these guys like their brain is [33:19] still dehydrated when they're in there [33:21] fighting. It's only 24 hours after they [33:23] rehydrate. That's not enough time to get [33:25] to the brain. [33:26] >> I would go to weighins with you and [33:28] these guys would come in like they [33:30] looking like they had cancer. [33:31] >> They look dead. Yeah. [33:32] >> They I would see them and then they [33:34] would IV in the back. Then I think they [33:35] cut out IVs afterwards. They cut out [33:37] IVs. [33:38] >> I remember being there with you and [33:39] looking at these guys coming in. [33:40] >> They were dying. [33:41] >> They looked like they were on that [33:43] [ __ ] GLP for 10 years. Like [ __ ] [33:46] Sharon Osborne's daughter. I mean, they [33:47] were looking [ __ ] up, Jack. [33:49] >> Yeah, they looked dead. Some guys looked [33:51] real. You remember when Anderson Silva [33:52] fought Travis Lutter? Do you remember [33:54] that fight? [33:54] >> Yeah. The jiu-jitsu guy from Texas? [33:56] >> Exactly. [33:56] >> Yes. [33:57] >> He That was the worst I ever saw anybody [33:59] at a weigh-in. [34:00] >> He looked really [ __ ] [34:01] >> And again, this was not the ceremonial [34:03] weigh-in like we have now. This was like [34:04] the actual weigh in. See if you can make [34:06] the weight. And Travis couldn't walk. He [34:08] was shuffling. He couldn't pick his legs [34:10] up. His his lips were cracked. Like he [34:13] his body was dried out. [34:14] >> Can't be good for you like that. And [34:16] then to pick it back up and then go [34:17] throw rounds, throw punches 8:00 the [34:20] next night. [34:21] >> Meanwhile, I mean, he was so depleted, [34:23] but he got a hold of Anderson the first [34:25] round. It took him down. And that's what [34:26] he wanted to do. And Travis in Texas. [34:29] >> Yeah. [laughter] [34:30] >> Kevin Holland's uh coach. [34:32] >> Oh [ __ ] Yeah. [34:33] >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Travis is a bad [34:34] [ __ ] [34:35] >> Was a bad [ __ ] [34:36] >> He was a when guys rolled with him on [34:38] the Ultimate Fighter. You know, one of [34:40] um one of the best compliments one of [34:42] the guys said, he goes, "Dude," he goes, [34:43] "I've rolled with only a couple guys [34:45] like that is like him and Ricardo [34:47] Laboro." I go, "Really?" I go, "That guy [34:49] feels like Ricardo Laboro. He's that [34:51] level." He goes, he's like, "Dude, he [34:53] was running through people. Just running [34:55] through people on the ground." Travis [34:57] was a beast. He was one of the first [34:59] like truly elite Brazilian jiu-jitsu [35:02] black belts in like the modern era, like [35:04] the Anderson Silva era. Whereas when he [35:06] got guys to the ground, you were in [35:07] trouble. You're in real trouble. There's [35:10] a few guys Charles Olivera is the big [35:12] one. Charles Olivera puts people in [35:14] positions they're like, "Oh no, what [35:15] have I done?" Like you think you're [35:16] going to be comfortable like in his [35:18] guard like pitch. You're never going to [35:20] be comfortable on the ground with [35:21] Olivea. Olive is just so dangerous [35:23] everywhere. [35:24] >> 20 years of jiu-jitsu, correct? 20 [35:26] years. They've been doing since they [35:27] were a kid. Yep. So, it's like stand up. [35:29] >> Great camp. He's from that shoot the box [35:31] camp. I mean, that camp produced [35:33] Anderson Silva. Um, Marie, um, Ninja, [35:38] uh, Shogun, like who else? No. [35:41] >> Ple Ple, the one of the original MMA [35:44] fighters back in the bare knuckle days. [35:46] He was the the top dude in the original [35:49] in the original days. No, Noggera is not [35:51] from Shootbox. Noggera is a Carlson [35:53] Gracie guy. Those was he is Carlson [35:57] Gracie, right? No, [35:59] >> Carlson's in Chicago. [36:01] >> No, no Ggera wasn't Carlson Gracie. [36:03] Noggera was um I don't want to get that [36:06] wrong. Who was Noggera's trainer? [36:08] Menitaro Noggera, his original jiu-jitsu [36:11] coach. [36:13] >> [ __ ] brother. Probably. [36:15] >> No, both of them were elite teasing you. [36:17] They were twins. [36:18] >> They were twins, right? [36:19] >> Yeah, they were twins. They were both [36:20] elite. They were both like world class [36:22] fighters in pride. [36:26] Does it say his jiu-jitsu coach? [36:29] >> Pull up his wik. [36:31] >> Minotauro was the first like he was the [36:34] first guy that was like finishing elite [36:37] guys off of his back in pride. Like he [36:41] was tapping to like when he was the [36:42] champion in pride. Like you remember [36:44] when he beat Bob Sap? [36:46] >> No. [36:47] >> Bob Sap was 350 lbs with abs. And the [36:52] the fight was crazy. He picks Minotauro [36:54] up and spikes him on his head in the [36:56] beginning of the fight. [ __ ] his neck [36:58] up for years. Like his neck was [ __ ] [37:00] up after that fight and still survived [37:02] and eventually caught Bob Sappin and [37:04] Armbar, but it was bananas. [37:07] Omry Bet. Okay. Yeah, there you go. Omry [37:10] Bet is another guy who fought early in [37:12] the UFC. [37:14] So that's his coach for one. Where did [37:16] he get his black belt? Just see where he [37:19] got his black belt from. [37:27] Just ask the question, who gave [37:29] Minotaurro his black belt? [37:37] Uh, let me say, okay, Hicardo Daha, [37:43] that's his primary instructor. [37:46] There you go. Okay. [37:49] Yeah, he was. Uh, [37:50] >> so we could assume he invented the delah [37:54] he hook [37:55] >> probably. There's a bunch of moves that [37:57] are attributed to guys that it's not [38:00] quite sure whether or not they invented [38:02] it, but they were really good at it, you [38:04] know. [38:05] >> How much fun is that getting somebody [38:06] and taking them down? [38:08] >> It's fun. [38:08] >> I can't finish the leg lock. I never [38:10] could. I'm [ __ ] terrible. I can't get [38:12] my arms around it. I'm [ __ ] My [38:14] shoulders are [ __ ] up. [38:15] >> Leg locks are scary. [38:17] >> Yeah, I don't like all of that [ __ ] You [38:18] [ __ ] them up, you know, you twist the [38:20] wrong way, you turn the wrong way, you [38:22] hear things pop. E, scary. [38:25] >> You still training with private? No [38:26] more? [38:27] >> No, I haven't over a year. I haven't [38:28] done any coming in with you. [38:30] >> I was for a while. I have a I got a knee [38:32] problem. It's much better now. I've been [38:34] really working on it over the last 6 [38:36] months, but it kept swelling after a [38:38] while. The the thing is it would get [38:40] better and uh I'd it would feel pretty [38:42] good and then I'd hurt it again. And [38:44] usually I heard it like a year ago [38:46] hunting. I twisted it. hunting and then [38:50] um I've I've also heard it like hitting [38:52] the back too. Like sometimes I just [38:54] start whailing on the back [38:55] >> of you forget. [38:56] >> Yeah, [38:57] >> you forget. [38:57] >> It's just the next day it's sore as [38:59] [ __ ] It's like I don't have meniscus on [39:01] one part of my knee. So I have to make [39:03] sure that it doesn't get arthritic. You [39:05] know what I mean? Because [39:06] >> like I don't have to tell you like once [39:08] your knee gets bad, it's a real problem. [39:09] It's a problem. And so you got to like [39:12] walk that edge between when you don't [39:14] have cartilage or you don't have [39:16] meniscus and your cartilage is getting [39:17] bone on bone like that. Like you got to [39:19] be careful. You got to be careful. [39:21] They're getting real close to fixing [39:23] [ __ ] Real close. They're injecting like [39:26] different kinds of gels in people's [39:28] knees now that re replace the meniscus. [39:31] And they're also doing some new stem [39:32] cell therapy where they go into the bone [39:34] itself and it regenerates [39:35] >> cartage. But that gel, they always work [39:38] you with that gel. I think it's a new [39:40] one, Joey. It's a It's like a It's They [39:42] call it a biological matrix. [39:44] >> You need to [ __ ] get like a You need [39:46] to get like a uh insurance approval and [39:48] all that. Yeah, I did it. That's just [39:51] all those things. It's like when you see [39:52] an ad for somebody, do you have problems [39:55] sleeping? Buy this mouthpiece for [39:58] $29.99. [39:59] >> I don't think you got what they have now [40:01] because this is just released in [40:03] Germany. This is this is brand new. But [40:05] this gel, like I'm just saying to you, [40:07] the gel, the cortisol. I have friends [40:09] with knee problems and they tell me what [40:11] they go through and they go to different [40:13] doctors and it's the same [ __ ] we got [40:17] cortisol for you. [40:18] >> We got the gel. We're not going to do [40:20] the PRP and we don't do stem cell. So [40:23] you Joe regular, you don't do no [40:25] reading. This is what happened to me [40:27] with the [ __ ] why I did the surgery [40:29] in the first place. you had moved here [40:31] and I didn't know about ways to well if [40:33] not I wouldn't have never cut this knee [40:34] the first time never never [40:38] >> I didn't read up on it because when my [40:41] wife was pregnant I read up on all that [40:44] [ __ ] and I was I didn't want to have the [40:45] baby no more cuz it said when you're old [40:48] for 43 you'll die if you give them birth [40:50] like so if you're not ready when you get [40:52] older as a woman you know now women are [40:54] having kids at 50s and [ __ ] 55s [40:57] >> but a woman has to be she has like a [40:59] short window And they have a lot of [41:01] things that could go wrong with the [41:03] pregnancy. When I read that, I got [41:04] nervous for my wife. I'm like, she's [41:06] going to die on a [ __ ] table [41:08] >> and I'm stuck raising a girl. I don't [41:09] know how to [ __ ] raise a girl, you [41:10] know? What am I going to do here? So, I [41:12] didn't really I researched it a little [41:14] bit after I got the kn after I went and [41:17] I saw the [ __ ] the chisel and the [41:20] [ __ ] mallet on the table. I go, we [41:22] got to look into this when I get out of [41:24] here. Like, this is [ __ ] insane. I [41:26] would have never done the redo knee. I [41:29] would have waited, shot it with stem [41:31] cell, BPCed it. At that time, I was [41:34] still a little fearful of needles. So, I [41:36] was like, uh, BPC them everything is you [41:38] got to shoot it. [41:39] >> You're feel fearful of needles, but not [41:41] of a knee replacement. That's hilarious. [41:42] >> No, I'm broke. Now, I'm fine [laughter] [41:44] now. It took It took four days in the [41:46] hospital last year to [ __ ] like go. [41:49] One day they had to come in and take [41:50] blood out of me every 20 minutes for 3 [41:52] hours. [41:53] >> Why? [41:54] >> It's that type of test. They shoot you [41:55] with something to see how you react to [41:57] it. [41:57] >> Wow. And dog, I didn't faint one time. I [42:00] don't faint no more. Unless like last [42:01] time I weighs too well. I went in there [42:03] hung over on those tequilas from [42:05] [laughter] the mother ship drinking that [42:06] Ron White juice and [ __ ] I went in [42:09] there with no breakfast like we need to [42:11] take blood out within minutes. I'm pale. [42:14] I'm sweating profusiously. They got to [42:15] put ice on my back and on my neck and [42:17] [ __ ] And when I did the when they turn [42:21] the switch off on your leg, what's that? [42:23] When you do that little before surgery, [42:26] when I first hurt the knee, they said, [42:28] "We're not going to give you pain [42:29] medication, but if you're really hurting [42:30] that bad, come on down here and we'll [42:32] give you a nerve block." [42:33] >> Oh, they give you a nerve block. [42:34] >> Joe Rogan. Holy [ __ ] [42:36] >> Well, who did that? Where' they do that? [42:38] >> Because the place where I went for [42:39] surgery, the first time they're [ __ ] [42:41] >> Uhhuh. [42:42] >> This place is specialized in all that [42:44] stuff. So, they have their own therapy. [42:47] They have their own uh like the surgeons [42:50] and then they have a pain department [42:52] >> that they talk to you [42:54] >> and they go listen you could take this [42:55] you want it we'll give it to you but [42:57] let's do this let's try it with this [42:59] they don't want you you know and I [43:00] understand it people lose their minds on [43:02] those [ __ ] things so I did the nerve [43:04] block first Joe [43:06] holy [ __ ] holy [ __ ] and when I went to [43:10] the doctor about a month ago the girl [43:12] was like I was there that day I go when [43:14] I fainted she goes you didn't faint but [43:16] you sure came goes. She goes, "You lost [43:18] all the color in your face. It's crazy, [43:20] Joey. Had to drink water." And then the [43:24] epidural block. You ever do one of [43:25] those? [43:26] >> No. Well, no, I did when I got my knee [43:28] surgery. [43:28] >> Yeah, they always knee surgery you I [43:30] thought they put you out for those. [43:31] >> They did most of the time, but my first [43:34] ACL I asked if I could watch. And uh he [43:37] said, "You don't want to watch it?" I [43:39] go, "No, I do. I don't want to I only [43:41] want to get this done once. I want to [43:42] see it. Can I watch it?" [43:43] >> Where'd you see it? And they shot in a [43:44] nail on your spine. [43:46] Well, they shot it in my spine and so it [43:48] it you don't feel anything in your legs [43:50] and I watched him open my knee up and [43:52] put it together again. [43:54] >> [ __ ] you, Joe. That's [laughter] [43:58] >> the epidural block is one of the wor [44:00] >> I wanted to see. I'm like, I don't want [44:01] to do this once. I I didn't know that I [44:03] was going to have another ACL surgery. [44:05] Eight years. [44:05] >> So, you didn't get put out for your [44:06] surgery? [44:07] >> No, not the first one. The second one I [44:09] did. [44:11] >> That's insane, Joe. That's [ __ ] [44:12] insane. I love you that you're Zombo and [44:15] [ __ ] but [44:16] >> I wanted to watch. [44:17] >> No, I want to watch a lot of things. [44:18] >> I want to see what it looks like because [44:19] it's kind of crazy. They're going to [44:20] take your knee, take a slice out of your [44:22] patella tendon along with a chunk of [44:24] bone and a chunk of bone for your [44:26] kneecap and then they screw it back in [44:27] place. I'm like, this is crazy. I want [44:29] to watch. Held up. Still [clears throat] [44:33] good. The the real problem was the [44:34] meniscus. So, they didn't even take the [44:36] meniscus out then. They just um stitched [44:39] it up. There was a tear in the meniscus, [44:41] but it wasn't too bad. and he thought it [44:43] could heal, you know, cuz I was my in my [44:45] 20s. I was like 23, I think, 22. Um, and [44:49] then, uh, over time it just got wore out [44:52] that that tear became a bucket handle [44:55] tear and then it would lock. So, it [44:58] would pull the meniscus would pull up [45:00] and like lock in place. It was [ __ ] [45:03] insanely painful. And I was like, "This [45:06] keeps happening." It happened a couple [45:07] of times. It was like it happened in [45:09] jiu-jitsu class and Eddie Bravo had to [45:11] take me to the doctor. So Eddie Bravo [45:12] had to drive my NSX. We drove straight [45:15] to the doctor and you know they tell me [45:18] I need to get my meniscus removed. I'm [45:20] like okay. And then he told me I need to [45:22] stop doing martial arts. I was like okay [45:24] that's cute. [45:25] >> That's the first thing they'll tell you. [45:26] >> Yeah. You got to stop doing martial [45:28] arts. [45:28] >> They everything. No martial arts. No [45:30] this. [45:31] >> 30 years later. [ __ ] you. [45:32] >> Can we get one of those in the medium [45:35] ones? What are these? [45:36] >> These are Alps. Those are That's Tucker [45:38] Carlson's one. It's uh Those are good. [45:40] It's uh six six milligrams. These are [45:43] threes. This is athletic nicotine. [45:45] That's threes. I like those. They don't [45:48] make you jittery. [45:49] Those those take a hell of a hit. Tucker [45:52] likes them strong. [45:52] >> I like them, but they [ __ ] I always [45:54] swallow them by mistake and they [45:55] [laughter] [ __ ] Next thing you know, [45:56] I'm [ __ ] pouches and [ __ ] I had [45:59] pouch. They have focus ones. [46:01] >> Yeah, that's that's these ultras. [46:03] >> Yeah, I do the ultras. [46:04] >> I don't have them in this room anymore. [46:06] I was doing those after I had the [46:07] surgery. [46:08] >> Those are great. Yeah, they are. [46:09] >> There's a bunch of really good things [46:10] for your focus. People that think it's [46:11] all [ __ ] you know, like that [46:13] neutropics are [ __ ] and you're [46:15] allowed to think whatever you want, but [46:17] trust me, from someone who uses uses his [46:19] brain for a living, there's a difference [46:21] between taking neutropics and not taking [46:23] them. It's not going to make you [46:24] smarter, but it'll make your brain [46:26] function at a better level. There's a [46:28] bunch of [ __ ] that works like that. [46:29] Like, you know those um those ketone [46:31] drinks, like ketone IQ, that helps a [46:33] lot. [46:34] >> Really? [46:34] >> Yeah. Your brain uses ketones. Your [46:36] brain uses ketones for focus. That's why [46:38] people that take ketogenic diets and go [46:40] on carnivore diet, they say it gives [46:42] them like more mental clarity. You have [46:43] more more focus. It's fact. Like I feel [46:47] different when I'm eating like clean. If [46:49] I'm eating like carnivore, just eggs and [46:51] steak, my brain works better 100%. [46:54] >> It's just not processing the carbs and [46:56] all the fog that comes with that. Not [46:58] that carbs are bad for you, [46:59] >> but when you um take this stuff, this [47:02] stuff is the [ __ ] This is my friend [47:04] Derek's Gorilla Mind. This is a [47:06] neutropic drink. It's [47:08] >> like an energy drink. No, [47:09] >> no, it's got some caffeine in. It's got [47:11] a good amount of caffeine, but it's got [47:12] a bunch of neutropics. So, there's a [47:14] bunch of like brain vitamins in there. [47:16] >> You know anything about [47:16] >> Yeah, I'm not selling this. This is uh [47:18] my friends, [47:19] >> you know, I'm not uh you know that I [47:21] have a great memory with dates and I can [47:23] take you to different situations, [47:25] >> stories. [47:26] >> I don't know what happened the last [47:27] three years. [47:29] >> How come? If I talked to you on a [47:31] Monday, which I usually do, you call me [47:33] Mondays on the way home at 6, [47:37] whatever we talked about by Thursday, [47:40] I don't remember. Like you'll say, "Call [47:42] me back. When you find out, I'll [ __ ] [47:44] forget now." Like just little things. [47:47] >> Recent this last few years. [47:49] >> Last few years. I could see, you know, [47:51] you know, you're 60. A lot of [ __ ] [47:52] changes. You You [47:54] >> You know, it's really weird. Joe, I need [47:56] eight now. [47:58] >> I need eight. Sorry. I need eight. [48:00] >> Eight what? [48:01] >> Hours of sleep. Eight. Solid. I got the [48:04] whoop. I need it. [48:05] >> Makes a difference. [48:06] >> Six and a half. Don't cut it. Done. [48:08] >> Done. [48:09] >> I need eight now. And don't get me [48:10] started on an hour nap or an hour or 15 [48:12] nap at 2 or 3:00 in the afternoon. If I [48:15] get up in the morning, I get up at 6. [48:17] >> So I put her on the bus. I start smoking [48:19] weed at 9. I'm at a gym. I'm doing [48:21] something. Boxing, PT, you know. So by [48:26] [ __ ] 2:00, dog, there's days I walk [48:28] in, there ain't no stopping. There ain't [48:31] no pissing. I go right to the bed, put [48:33] the mask on, and go right to sleep. [48:36] Just like that. I mean, there's no [48:38] thought. There's no stop it, get what is [48:41] that monopoly? Stop it, go and get 200. [48:43] [laughter] Ain't none of that. I come [48:45] in, I drop my bag, I pee, and I walk [48:47] right upstairs right to the bed. I move [48:49] the cat over. Get the [ __ ] over. [48:51] [laughter] And I [ __ ] put that mask [48:53] on. [48:54] >> Does the cat cuddle with you while [48:55] you're sleeping? [48:56] >> Oh, please. And he goes under the blank. [48:57] She goes under the blank with me, too. [48:58] So, it's perfect. [49:00] >> That's funny. [49:01] >> But, dog, it's not no more. Like, I'm [49:03] don't fly out early no more. [49:06] >> [ __ ] you. [49:07] >> Yeah, you need you need a solid amount [49:09] of sleep. As you get older, it's even [49:11] more important. You know what else is [49:12] really important? Creatine. [49:14] >> I take 10 milligrams twice a day. [49:16] >> Beautiful. [49:17] >> Beautiful. [49:18] >> Beautiful. That's phenomenal for your [49:19] memory and that's a really good [49:21] neutropic as well. [49:22] >> I don't like the gummies. I never got [49:24] You had some gummies on here. [49:26] >> Good. I like them. [49:26] >> My neighbor gave them to me that you had [49:28] them. [49:28] >> I prefer to just open it up and pour it [49:30] in my mouth and then drink water. [49:32] >> Yeah, me too. I like the powder, too. [49:33] >> Yeah. I put like the 10 milligrams in my [49:35] mouth and I just drink water. [49:37] >> You don't put it on your food, do you? [49:38] >> No. [49:39] >> I just keep put I put in a smoothie from [49:41] time to time. I like the raspberries [49:43] with coconut water. the make the best [49:45] way to make sure that I'm getting all 10 [49:47] milligrams is to just pour it in my [49:49] mouth and then drink water with it [49:51] because otherwise it's in the glass. You [49:53] got to rinse the glass and get more of [49:55] it in. You know, you're giving yourself [49:57] an exact dose. Just put it in your [49:58] mouth. Dry scoop it. So, I just dry [50:00] scoop it in my mouth and then pour the [50:01] water in there. Okay, [50:02] >> that's how I do it most of the time. [50:04] What the gummies are really good for is [50:05] if you forget and they're just laying [50:06] around, you just eat a couple of [50:08] gummies. [50:09] >> You know, [50:10] >> I don't know how many milligrams are in [50:11] the nose, right? [50:12] [ __ ] I think two gummies is 5 millig. [50:16] I think that's what it is. [50:18] >> I also got turned on to a creatine [50:20] company that has a creatine precursor. [50:22] Is that [50:23] >> creatine? A precursor. [50:24] >> Creatine precursor. [50:25] >> I don't know what that is. [50:26] >> Your own body creates creatine [50:28] >> on its own. This helps. [50:30] >> Oh, interesting. [50:31] >> The body I think it's called a [50:32] precursor. Don't [ __ ] [50:34] >> Yeah, I don't know. [50:34] >> Hey, did I say just right off with a [50:37] [ __ ] You know what I'm saying? I [50:38] [laughter] know that cuz I'm saying it [50:40] wrong. like Voltron. I don't [ __ ] [50:42] know, guys. [50:42] >> I'm sure there's something. I mean, [50:44] there's always a bunch. I mean, there's [50:46] if you think about how many supplements [50:48] are out there. Like, good lord, there's [50:50] so many supplements. And not all of them [50:52] are good, but a lot of them are really [50:53] good. Here's another one that's really [50:54] good for working out. Beta alanine. You [50:56] ever take that? [50:57] >> No. [50:57] >> Phenomenal. Phenomenal. [50:59] >> I take everything else. It's just [51:01] >> makes you tingle, though. Makes your [51:02] skin like itch. [51:04] >> You ever take iodine? [51:05] >> No. Iodine. [51:06] >> Yeah. Like you there's a pill or [51:08] something. You take iodine to help you. [51:09] You're supposed to do that if you get [51:10] radiation poisoning. [51:11] >> Listen, when the first piss test came [51:13] out, they said you would take iodine. So [51:16] again, [51:16] >> you put Clorox in your dick. [51:18] >> I put Clorox in my dick afterward [51:19] [laughter] because the iodine obviously [51:21] didn't [ __ ] work. Okay. [51:25] [laughter] [51:25] >> Imagine when they read your piss through [51:27] the [ __ ] test machine, they be like, [51:28] "What? What did What is this?" [51:30] >> Do you understand? [51:31] >> This isn't piss. [laughter] [51:32] >> Do you understand? Like one of the best [51:34] times I go every morning I go out and [51:36] take my cup of coffee and I sit outside. [51:38] I thank God, you know, the whole [ __ ] [51:40] [ __ ] story. And then it takes me [51:42] somewhere like after the second cup of [51:44] coffee and one of these zins and a [51:45] bonget, your mind goes somewhere and I [51:48] think of chunks of my life and I go, [51:51] "What the [ __ ] was that?" [51:54] >> Like that was Joe. That was insanity. [51:57] What about every time he used to come to [51:59] my house to do the checkup, I never let [52:01] him in. He came like 11 times in two [52:04] years. I never let him in my house. He [52:06] wouldn't know I was in [laughter] the [52:07] house. He would put the sheriffs to come [52:09] and sit outside my house for two hours. [52:12] Then they would leave. They're like, [52:13] "We're not going to He's not home." I [52:15] never let him in my house. I tortured [52:17] that guy. That's right. [52:18] >> He could have sent me to prison. I still [52:20] would have been in prison. [52:21] >> But it was such a like first it was the [52:23] iodine [52:24] >> and then you [ __ ] you know, you're [52:26] supposed to take 20 milligrams. I mean, [52:28] 200, whatever. I don't know. And my skin [52:31] is burning. I'm [ __ ] red in the face. [52:33] I got issues. So, I stopped with the [52:35] iodine. I still came back positive. Then [52:37] I went on the [ __ ] uh white vinegar. [52:41] >> White vinegar. [52:42] >> White vinegar with a [ __ ] bottle of [52:44] Gatorade on a Monday morning. Not a [52:47] little vinegar. Not red wine vinegar. [52:49] The real vinegar that you clean your [52:51] [ __ ] with [laughter] [52:53] and douchebags and all that [ __ ] [52:55] Vinegar cleans you. That's what women [52:57] wash their monkey with vinegar because [52:59] it takes all the [ __ ] cat piss out of [53:02] all [laughter] the [ __ ] they got in [53:03] there. [53:05] So they said, "Drink vinegar every [53:07] Monday morning, bro." And it's like a [53:09] process. Like you would get high Friday [53:12] and you would hope to beat it by Sunday, [53:14] but you knew you weren't going to beat [53:15] it. And they're going to call you [53:16] Monday. And it was like your color is [53:18] yellow, right? Like if they say yellow, [53:21] you got to come in. So you wait till [53:23] 1:00 and you're like, "All right." You [53:24] had to call in and all a sudden today, [53:27] Monday, Tuesday, the 9th of June, the [53:30] colors are purple. And you're like, [53:32] "Yellow. God damn. Now I got Now I got [53:34] to figure out I got 5 hours. The place [53:37] closes at 6:00. So I got to figure out [53:39] how to stop this cocaine from coming up. [53:42] So then we started taking STO. [53:46] >> What's Serto? [53:46] >> Serto is what you put in like jello. [53:49] It's that thing that makes the jello [53:51] jiggle or some [ __ ] like [53:52] >> what [53:55] [ __ ] sauo. No, [53:56] >> there [laughter] was there was no [53:58] internet these days. These are just [54:00] these are seal. [54:00] >> What is that? a brand of liquid fruit [54:02] pectin most commonly used in the kitchen [54:04] as a thickening agent [laughter] for [54:06] homemade jams and jellies. However, it's [54:09] also widely known as an internet folk [54:11] remedy people use an attempt to mask [54:12] drug drug metabolites in urine. It's a [54:16] folk remedy. [54:17] >> It's [ __ ] [ __ ] [54:18] >> Does it work? [54:19] >> No. That's why [54:20] >> let's find out if it works. Uh the myth. [54:23] Many online forums suggest mixing sauo [54:26] with a large sports drink like Gatorade [54:28] and drinking it a few hours before a [54:29] drug urine test. The theory claims the [54:32] fiber traps toxins in your digestive [54:34] tract. Reality, health professionals and [54:37] medical studies show no scientific [54:39] evidence that fruit pectin can reliably [54:41] clear drugs or toxins from your urine. [54:43] While fiber works in the gut, has no [54:45] effect on what your kidneys filter into [54:48] your urine. This episode is brought to [54:50] you by Arra. Every week there's some new [54:52] wellness hack that people swear by. And [54:54] after a while, you start thinking, why [54:57] do we think we can just outsmart our [54:59] bodies? That's why armra colostrum [55:02] caught my attention. It's something the [55:04] body already recognizes and it has [55:06] hundreds of these specialized nutrients [55:09] for gut stuff, immunity, metabolism, [55:12] etc. I first noticed it working around [55:14] training, especially workout recovery. [55:17] Most stuff falls off, but I am still [55:18] taking this. If you want to try, Armra [55:20] is offering my listeners 30% off plus [55:23] two free gifts. Go to arra.com/rogan. [55:28] But again, you get your advice from a [55:29] guy who's done 30 [ __ ] years. Then [55:31] you forget he's been doing 30 years [55:32] because he made mistakes, not because [55:34] he's a [ __ ] genius about Serto. [55:36] Exactly. [55:36] >> You know, and then we went from Serto [55:38] and then one day I was swimming. [55:39] >> Does anything work? [55:40] >> Huh? [55:41] >> Is anything work? [55:42] >> No. Cranberry juice. [55:43] >> What about that stuff that they used to [55:45] sell? Remember they used to sell stuff? [55:46] >> This is 90 [ __ ] This is 89. They [55:49] didn't sell nothing. [55:50] >> No, but do you remember there was some [55:52] stuff that you could buy this? Yeah. No. [55:55] No. You're saying you could buy piss [55:56] now. Now it's completely different. [55:58] >> You could buy piss. [55:59] >> Yeah, you could buy piss online. Just [56:00] get that uh whatever [laughter] that [56:01] dirty that dirty [ __ ] uh XPTt, [56:05] whatever. You go on and you could search [56:06] hidden [ __ ] all over the world. [56:08] >> Got to get a rubber dick and take that [56:10] piss. And [56:10] >> dog, I had a guy who made a rubber dick. [56:14] Normal could not start snorting coke. [56:16] So, he made a a contraption where he [56:18] filled up his son's piss in a hot water [56:20] bottle and did the same thing with the [56:22] douche. And he took the douche on the [56:24] bottom. Scots taped it to his dick and [56:26] he would piss and squeeze his chest. [56:30] >> Oh my god. That's [56:31] >> Then one day the thing blew up [56:32] [laughter] [56:36] >> and he was a bank robber. They sent to [56:37] jail for 30 [ __ ] years. [56:39] >> Want to hear the craziest steroid uh [56:41] evasion story that I ever heard from [56:42] piss. There was a guy who was fighting [56:44] and he knew he was going to get piss [56:46] test and he was just juiced to the tits. [56:48] So the legend is that they inserted [56:52] clean urine into his bladder through [56:55] injection. [56:57] So he injected clean urine into his [57:01] bladder with a needle. [57:05] Whether or not that's true, I have no [57:06] idea. But this is what everybody This is [57:09] like early days of the UFC, like when [57:11] they first started drug testing people. [57:12] >> Would you think [57:13] >> I don't even think it was in the UFC [57:14] that he did this. I think it was in [57:16] another organization. But I don't know [57:18] if it's true. [57:18] >> Think about what's going on the other [57:19] side of this. [57:20] >> Your addiction is that high. [57:23] >> Well, these guys when they're that [57:24] juiced up, when they're that juiced up, [57:26] they're not getting off of it. Cuz if [57:27] they get off, they'll have no muscle. [57:28] >> I get it. I understand. So, you [57:30] understand the extremes that people do. [57:32] >> Could you ever shoot [ __ ] fake piss? [57:35] >> Like, Joey, go piss in the [ __ ] [57:37] thing. I'm going to shoot Joey's piss. [57:39] >> A guy willing to do that and trusting [57:41] that guy was finding your bladder. He [57:43] could shoot piss into your liver. Like, [57:44] who who knows what this guy even [57:46] understands? levels that you do. [57:48] >> So, here I am, sir. It don't work. [57:50] [ __ ] nothing works. And one day I'm [57:52] in a pool. And I'm like, "Oh [ __ ] when [57:54] you piss in the pool, [57:56] >> the pool cleaner [57:58] cleaned all this and not the pool would [58:00] be green the next day." [58:01] >> So, this is your logic. [58:02] >> I went I [laughter] took the kids I took [58:05] one of those cubes first [58:06] >> where the crumbs [58:08] >> smashed it up [58:10] and then I put it on my outside of a [58:12] dick cuz I'm uncircumcised. So I would [58:14] pull the skin back and that would fall [58:16] into the [ __ ] piss. And then so he [58:18] told me once he go something happened [58:20] last time you [ __ ] up the machine or [58:22] something like that, right? [58:23] >> Women would insert condoms filled with [58:25] someone else's urine inside themselves. [58:27] He said some athletes would inject urine [58:29] into their bladders using a catheter. Oh [58:31] god, they did do that. So that's real. [58:34] [gasps] [58:35] So maybe that's how he did it. Maybe [58:36] they used a catheter and that's how they [58:38] put the fake. [58:39] >> But then there's the wizator. [58:40] >> Yeah, that was the rubber dick. That's [58:42] uh one of those. [58:43] >> Wasn't there some stuff that you could [58:45] buy that would you would get at like a [58:47] head shop and supposedly detox you? [58:49] >> This is 89. [58:50] >> But does that stuff work? [58:52] >> Nothing. When I was googling it, it says [58:54] nothing's real. That's [58:55] >> Nothing's real. Yeah. I always assumed [58:56] that it wasn't real. I was like, "You [58:58] selling this at a head shop?" [58:59] >> Stuff from the '9s. These are some of [59:00] the product. [59:01] >> But the killer was when I used Drano. [59:03] >> Oh, okay. So, this is all [ __ ] [59:04] >> Yeah. They just rob people. [59:06] >> They just rob people. [59:06] >> Fetish urine. Look at that. It says, [59:08] look at that's labels. Fetish urine. [59:11] What the [ __ ] does that mean? [59:12] >> It's probably a way to sell it because [59:14] you have to say what [59:15] >> you know not for human consumption or [59:18] something. [59:18] >> Oh, so that's your buying piss. Oh, so [59:20] that's an actual bag of piss on the [59:22] right. [laughter] [59:23] >> Oh, good lord. [59:24] >> This one calls it tinkle. [59:25] >> It's fetish urine. So if you just like [59:27] want someone to piss on you, but no [59:28] one's willing you. [snorts] [59:31] You've already told that story about the [59:33] guy with the gay club, the guy at the [59:35] bathtub that [59:36] >> everybody was pissing on him in the tub. [59:38] >> Yeah. [59:38] >> And then that party Shamer took me to in [59:40] that hotel next to the comedy store and [59:42] they were getting pissed on in there, [59:43] the women. And then I wake up sadly. I'm [59:46] feeling good about myself and I'm on [59:48] Twitter. I see Bonnie Blue. She had a [59:51] that chick is [ __ ] She got pissed on [59:54] had a baby shower in her ass. People [59:56] were pissing her [ __ ] in her ass and [59:58] I'm like, somebody's got to stop that [60:00] woman. She's the least of her problems. [60:02] >> Oh my god. A [ __ ] baby shower. [60:05] >> When I used a drain, although that was [60:06] the best because that destroyed the [60:08] machine. [laughter] [60:10] >> But But the truth of the matter is [60:14] >> when he said something happened last [60:15] time, [60:16] >> well, this is what happened. I put the [60:17] drain on my dick [60:19] >> and I walked up to the counter and I put [60:21] on the desk and he asked you questions. [60:22] How's it been? [60:24] And I'm looking at the thing and it's [60:25] starting to foam like this thing [60:28] [laughter] [60:29] and it's coming out OF THE BAG [60:30] DISHWASHER. [60:32] >> And I'm looking at this thing going, [60:34] "This [ __ ] better." And what he [60:36] did was he just picked it up and threw [60:37] it in the bag like when they pick it up [60:39] and test it. [60:41] >> Sometimes you leave the cop top off. [60:42] That was an old trick. You leave the top [60:44] off and then it spilled. Uh [60:45] >> oh no. [60:46] >> So that buys you one extra week. But the [60:48] time with the draano, it started like it [60:50] was like shaking at the thing like foam [60:52] was coming out of the [ __ ] sides and [60:54] I locked it up [laughter] good. That's [60:55] what happened. There was no oxygen. That [60:57] [ __ ] was like, you know, boom. [60:59] So [laughter] I put in the [ __ ] [61:00] thing. And he called me a few days [61:03] later. He's like, "Listen, I wrote up a [61:04] thing. I'm taking you to court because [61:06] you broke the machine. This cannot [61:08] continue. [61:09] >> This cannot continue. [61:10] >> This can't continue. [laughter] This [61:11] can't continue. This is like a [ __ ] [61:13] >> cat and mouse game. What did you PUT IN [61:16] YOUR BODY? WHAT HAPPENED? [laughter] [61:19] What the [ __ ] is going [snorts] on, [61:21] Jose? [61:22] >> So, [61:22] >> they say, "Hey, your machine sucks. Your [61:25] machine broke." [61:26] >> And then after nothing to do with me. [61:27] >> No. And then they put me on like this [61:29] hold. They were like, "We're not even [61:30] going to piss. You don't want the We're [61:32] done. We can't take this mental [ __ ] [61:34] [laughter] [61:37] >> So, this is when you in the probation [61:39] department. Now, they were going to [61:40] throw me back in community corrections [61:42] because they'll put you in for 90 days." [61:44] and all that. I met this [ __ ] guy [61:47] for 3 months. We spoke like nothing, [61:50] like gentlemen. I would talk to him, saw [61:51] him once a week. And one day I said, [61:54] "What do you do?" And he goes, "I'm a [61:56] district attorney in Boulder, Bill [61:57] Wise." [61:59] I I need a beef, man. I need a problem. [62:01] I'm on this probation. They won't leave [62:02] me alone. What do I do to get off? He [62:05] goes, "Just have your attorney draw up a [62:07] a statement and I'll sign it and get you [62:09] all probation." And that was it. M [62:11] >> just a guy I met on the street, Bill [62:13] Wise, and then he got fired after the [62:15] John Bet Ramsey thing. [62:17] >> He was there during the whole John Bet [62:18] Ramsey thing and everybody got [ __ ] [62:20] fired, I guess. I don't know. Bill Wise [62:22] was a great dude, man. He was good to [62:23] me. And I told him, we asked him what I [62:25] did. I told him the truth and he goes, [62:26] "Did you learn from mistake?" "Yeah, I'm [62:29] here working." He goes, "Okay, pass it [62:32] over and I'll sign." I'm like, "Oh my [62:33] god, how [ __ ] lucky am I? I'm done. [62:36] I'm done." I was done. started in ' 87. [62:40] It was all the way to 91. For a year, I [62:42] was [ __ ] them up with the pee thing. [62:44] [laughter] [62:45] Then they put me back in the half spot [62:46] in the halfway house. And that was even [62:48] worse. I was out of control in there. [62:50] Out of there was freaks in there. [62:52] There's [ __ ] everything in there. [62:53] Freaky girls. I was stealing the air [62:56] conditioner out of the conference room [62:57] and put it in my room. They couldn't [62:59] They couldn't handle me there either. [63:01] They were like, "Dog, [laughter] you [63:02] just go home. We're not going to [ __ ] [63:04] with you no more." [63:06] >> And that's what you do. you do just wear [63:07] somebody ragging. They'll let you go [63:09] eventually. They'll just say, "You know [63:10] what, man? It ain't worth it. You're [63:12] never going to stop. You're never going [63:14] to stop." And then a year later, I had [63:16] like an affair with the one time I had [63:18] an affair with like the chick that [63:20] worked in that office. She's the one [63:22] that had the one leg. [63:23] >> They deliver Chinese food to her. [63:28] It never stopped. And you think of those [63:30] chunks in your life and [snorts] go, [63:31] "What the [ __ ] was going on?" [63:34] >> Yeah. You were out of control. Like it's [63:36] 31 years and I still won't get back to [63:38] Boulder because of the shame I endured. [63:40] [laughter] [63:41] Seriously, like I won't Everybody goes, [63:43] "Why don't you go back to Boulder?" [63:44] Because I'm ashamed that that was such a [63:46] beautiful city and I treated like it was [63:49] Newark, [63:49] >> right? [63:50] >> Like I did what I wanted. I would go to [63:51] Kmart, hang out outside of [ __ ] the [63:53] the lawn more department and people will [63:56] come out with new lawnmowers and the [63:58] receipt would fly off. I get that [64:00] receipt and go to Longmont and get that [64:02] lawnmower for 400 and walk it up and go, [64:04] "My mother bought me this. I don't want [64:06] it no more." And I give him the receipt [64:07] and they gave me 400 cash plus plus tax. [64:09] Who does that? That [ __ ] Toys R Us. I [64:13] took that thing down by myself with [64:14] those Jeffrey bucks. I took them down. [64:17] >> What's a Jeffrey buck? [64:18] >> They It's like when you bring a a stolen [64:20] computer in there and they give you They [64:21] won't give you cash. They'll give you [64:23] Jeffrey bucks. [64:24] >> So, you have to spend it on in the [64:26] [ __ ] store. [64:27] >> You know, I had a million dollars in [64:28] Jeffrey Bucks. So one time I was buying [64:30] bicycles and [ __ ] [64:32] it's just it just I was an animal and I [64:35] feel really guilty about it today. I'm [64:38] thinking of booking the Fox Theater in [64:39] Boulder and doing like cuz Leisio is [64:42] opening back up my Italian joint. [64:44] >> So they called and they said we're [64:45] opening back up and I'm like I'm [64:46] thinking of doing Boulder like Fox [64:48] Theater. Just take my lumps, apologize, [64:51] donate to something there and just call [64:53] it a [ __ ] night cuz I still feel [64:54] guilty man. And I'm old, but now I feel [64:56] guilty about the damage. I put Boulder [64:59] through [ __ ] eight I mean, I got [65:00] chased through the mall by security and [65:02] I'm throwing [ __ ] CDs at them. [65:05] [laughter] I remember the Denver Broncos [65:06] were playing Cleveland in ' 87, those [65:08] big playoff games. Do you remember [65:09] those, Jamie? [65:10] >> Doug, I'm at the mall one day and [65:12] everybody's in the hallway looking at [65:13] TVs. I'm like, who's minding the stores? [65:16] I went into Radio Shack and I popped out [65:18] the [ __ ] CD player, brand new one, [65:20] and just put the quarter on it and [65:21] walked out like nothing. Who does that, [65:23] dog? That's animal. I'm I'm ashamed to [65:25] admit this [ __ ] but it was like you [65:27] said when you first went to Boulder the [65:29] first time. You're like, "This must have [65:30] been a [ __ ] grocery store for Joey [65:33] Diaz." [65:34] >> That's exactly what I said when I went [65:35] there. [65:36] >> It was [laughter] It was a shame. [65:37] >> Everybody's so They're so like peaceful [65:41] and sweet. [65:42] >> I brought chaos. [65:44] >> Yeah, [65:45] >> chaos. And it was too much. When I was [65:48] in the prison, I brought chaos in there. [65:50] I had my cell open. I did what I wanted. [65:52] It was just too much. And I to this day [65:54] it's New York. You could [ __ ] like that [65:56] because that's what New York is about. I [65:58] was a [ __ ] piece of [ __ ] in New York [66:00] too. But I don't feel guilty about that. [66:01] I still walk around the city now. [66:03] >> Got so many pieces of [ __ ] in New York. [66:05] Unique in Boulder. [66:06] >> It was unique. But in Boulder they [66:07] didn't have anything like me. [66:08] >> They didn't they had no [66:09] >> I was shaking down people. Some guy kept [66:12] telling me I saw you on A&E. Remember in [66:14] the in the ' 90s and ' 80s A&E was a [66:16] mafia channel. They talked Bill whatever [66:18] talked about A&E to call the own family. [66:21] >> And this guy saw me one day. like, "Hey, [66:23] you're the guy that's in the witness [66:25] relocation plan." This is 8 [ __ ] [66:29] nine. This is way before Sammy and all [66:31] those guys went in. This guy's telling [66:33] me you you're a witness relocated guy. A [66:35] little Italian guy. I saw you on on A&E. [66:39] You're George the Animal Something from [66:40] Boston. I'm like, "Dog, that's not me. [66:43] Stop saying that. I already got problems [66:45] in [ __ ] Boulder and you're telling [66:47] people that I'm a witness relocated [66:48] mafia guy." [66:50] He pissed me off so much. Finally, I [66:52] just kicked his [ __ ] door down. He [66:53] had like one of those Italian knickknack [66:54] stores. I went in there and I said, [66:56] "Dog, since I'm George the animal, I am. [66:58] You're going to give me 200 a week." [67:00] Bro, he started giving me 200 a week for [67:02] like 3 weeks. Then he called a sit down [67:04] with Antonio Lizio. And Antonio's like, [67:07] "Yeah, you got to keep paying him." And [67:08] the guy closed up shop like 3 weeks [67:10] later. I never saw him again. Little [67:12] Italian guy would always kick his shoes [67:14] up. Dog, that's crazy [ __ ] I would [67:16] snort coke at an ATM in Boulder. They [67:19] had a next to Murphy's there's an ATM [67:21] you could walk into with the door. I [67:23] would go in there with a case of beer at [67:24] night and just put Coke on the metal. [67:26] People [snorts] would come and go ahead. [67:32] Can't take this [ __ ] back. But it [67:33] [clears throat] was done and I can't [67:34] undo it, you know? [67:36] >> But it bothers you now. [67:39] >> Well, does it bother you or does it just [67:40] make you confused like how the [ __ ] I [67:43] >> Nobody remember half this [ __ ] I'm [67:44] saying. Nobody ever remember this [ __ ] [67:46] People are on they moved on with their [67:48] lives. They saw me now. They go, "Hey, [67:49] that's a guy that kidnapped the guy." [67:51] No, you know, my name was in the paper. [67:53] My picture wasn't. They didn't have a [67:55] picture of me, but everything else was [67:56] in the [ __ ] paper. It's a guilt. It's [67:59] a weird [ __ ] guilt, man. That I could [68:01] have done so much better there if I [68:03] would have play If I would have played [68:04] my card, right? I could have graduated [68:05] college as a [ __ ] astronaut cuz they [68:07] were going to give me everything just [68:08] cuz I was Cuban. They had no Spanish [68:10] people at that college. They had only [68:13] like eight blacks that played football. [68:14] So, they were doing anything to get [68:16] Latinos. I would have been a [ __ ] [68:18] astronaut [laughter] [68:19] >> with a GED. [68:20] >> Yeah, but we would have missed this, [68:22] Joey. [68:23] >> Yeah, but [68:23] >> it's good that it turned out this way. [68:25] >> Let me ask you something. If you [68:26] wouldn't have gotten into [laughter] [68:27] this [ __ ] thing, what would you what [68:28] would you think you'd be doing now? [68:30] >> If I hadn't gotten into which one? [68:32] >> This thing that we're doing, standup [68:33] comedy. No, stand up comedy opened up [68:35] everything. [68:36] >> What would I be doing? Uh, I don't know, [68:38] man. I don't know. I probably would have [68:40] fought again. [68:40] >> Would you be a chef? Would you be I [68:42] mean, I could pin you as a chef. You [68:44] love to cook. [68:45] >> Yeah, I do love to cook. Um, chef, a [68:47] mason. [68:47] >> I found something that I enjoyed doing. [68:50] >> What? [68:50] >> I don't know. I would have figured it [68:52] out. [68:52] >> What's your second love? [68:53] >> The real problem would be if I had a kid [68:56] real young. [68:57] >> So, if uh, you know, I know a bunch of [68:59] my friends got married and had kids when [69:01] they're like 22, 23. [69:02] >> The pro, there's nothing wrong with [69:04] that, but [clears throat] then that [69:06] really limits your ability to just go [69:08] for it because you have mouths to feed. [69:10] That's a different animal. You know, I I [69:12] think about the early days of standup [69:13] when I was 21 and how I had zero money. [69:17] I mean, zero. I had zero money. I barely [69:19] could eat. I [clears throat] remember I [69:21] had a a big [ __ ] jar of pennies and [69:24] nickels and dimes and [ __ ] and I [69:26] remember rolling it all up so I could go [69:28] get a sandwich. Like I [snorts] had no [69:30] money. And so I were I could imagine [69:33] like if I was trying to do that, I said, [69:35] "Well, I'm just going to live like this [69:36] for a couple years and I think if I work [69:39] hard enough, I could eventually start [69:41] making money doing standup and if I keep [69:42] getting better, maybe I could be a [69:44] professional, you know, that was the [69:46] idea. It was never like have a career. [69:48] But if I had a kid and I had a wife, [69:51] there's no way I would have done it. [69:52] [clears throat] There's no way I would [69:53] have to have gotten a job." And that's [69:55] where a lot of people get into, you [69:57] know, or maybe you think it's going to [70:00] be a good investment to get a house, [70:02] which it is, but now you've got a [70:03] mortgage. So, you got a mortgage, you [70:05] can't just [ __ ] lose everything. [70:07] Like, I got my car repossessed. I was [70:09] broke, man. I was broke, [70:11] >> bro. I used to have to hide my car in a [70:12] garage so they won't repossess. [70:14] [laughter] [70:15] >> [ __ ] [70:16] >> Yeah. I mean, it was 100% check to [70:19] check. Never had any money in the bank. [70:20] >> I don't know if this ever happens to [70:22] you, but it happens to me a lot now. And [70:24] this is why I started this grateful [ __ ] [70:26] because that day is I pull up to my [70:29] house. I don't know who lives there. [70:32] >> Yeah. [70:33] >> I go, who lives here? [70:35] This is me really. [70:37] >> I know it doesn't feel real. [70:38] >> And then you ask, you say yourself, this [70:40] is the most important thing for people [70:42] listening. I want you to listen to this. [70:44] If you have a dream or a goal, you go, I [70:46] got to pay for that with comedy, [70:49] which I always thought I was just going [70:50] to make $100 a set. And I would have [70:52] been fine with that if nobody would ever [70:55] bothered me in my life. I would have [70:56] been fine with $100 a set, getting in my [70:59] beat up car and doing that, getting your [71:02] dick sucked, getting STDs. I would have [71:04] done all that [ __ ] you know? That's [71:05] what it is. [71:07] So when you look at your house, whether [71:09] it cost $40,000 or $80 million and go, I [71:13] paid for this doing $15 sets at the [71:16] comedy store. [71:17] >> Yeah. [71:18] >> When you got into this, you just wanted [71:20] to survive. Never mind the [ __ ] house [71:23] and cars and you never dreamed of this [71:26] with standup. I know I didn't. [71:28] >> I never dreamed of this with anything. [71:30] No, [71:30] >> I I never thought I would be a person [71:33] who had money. [71:34] >> I dreamed of being a funny person and to [71:37] be funny enough to make a living in [71:38] standup. Yeah. [71:39] >> I never saw this part of it. So when I [71:41] pull up in my house and I go, that was [71:43] paid with $20 sets. [71:45] >> $25 here, 15 here, 100 here. Yeah, that [71:48] adds up. I'm not saying that. But that [71:51] was paid by a dream. [71:52] >> Yeah. [71:52] >> Not a job, not something my family did. [71:55] I wasn't forced into like raising lemons [71:58] or whatever the [ __ ] people do that are [71:59] decent, you know, growing lemons, [72:01] [laughter] you know? Seriously, we were [72:03] born into this. This is something we got [72:05] into and said, "I just want to survive. [72:09] >> I just want to be able to eat three [72:10] meals and get enough gas to go to the [72:12] next thing." Forget money in the bank. [72:14] Forget it. It's overrated. I would never [72:17] even open up a bank account. I didn't [72:18] open up a bank account till I was 40 [72:20] years old, you know? I just ran on [72:22] whatever the [ __ ] I would open and put [72:23] 20 in and write a bounce check and [72:26] [ __ ] move on and pray that nobody [72:28] caught you, you know? And people have no [72:30] idea what that feeling is like. I get in [72:32] my car and I go, "Holy shit." How many [72:34] cars did I have that I had a What are [72:36] those? Bungee cords. Oh, yeah. A bungee [72:37] cord. [72:39] >> I had a car when I first did comedy. I [72:40] had to close the door with a bungee cord [72:43] across my thing. It was like my [72:44] combination seat belt because if I took [72:46] a [ __ ] right turn, the door would [72:48] open. [72:49] You know, the door would just wing open. [72:51] Now I'm in a car that's [ __ ] I paid [72:53] for with comedy, not drugs. [72:55] >> A nice one. [72:56] >> Not anything. No. Whether it's nice or [72:59] not, you paid for this without nobody's [73:01] interference with somebody with [73:03] something that somebody told you you'd [73:04] never be good at. [73:06] >> You never be good at. Somebody at least [73:08] said it to you one time. Joe, come on, [73:10] man. Comedy. [73:11] >> You're never going to What do you think? [73:12] You're going to be on HBO with [ __ ] [73:13] [clears throat] Richard Prior and George [73:15] Carlin. You laugh, but you're like, they [73:17] kind of right. They were [ __ ] wrong. [73:18] We didn't know it. We just didn't [73:20] [ __ ] know it. [73:21] >> Well, it's like telling someone, "I'm [73:23] going to run 200 miles." Like, no, [73:25] you're not. You can't even run around [73:26] the block. like, "No, one day I'm going [73:28] to run 200 miles." Like, "No, you're [73:29] not. You're not going to run 200 miles." [73:32] And most of the time they're right. But [73:34] if you're one of those [ __ ] [73:36] that says, "Look, it might take me 10 [73:38] years to develop the endurance to run [73:39] 200 miles. But I I can't if I start [73:42] right now, next month I'm going to be [73:44] able to run five miles, you know, in six [73:47] months I'll be able to run 10 miles, and [73:49] then I'm going to keep going." [73:50] >> But then you quit before the miracle [73:52] happens. [73:53] >> Well, somewhere along the line, not [73:54] >> How many people do we know that quit? [73:56] How many people do we know that were [73:57] really talented, that were really funny, [73:59] >> and just disappeared and now you see him [74:00] like [74:01] >> I don't want to shame anybody, but [74:02] there's a few guys and there's this one [74:04] guy at the early days of the comedy [74:05] store that I really tried to help. I [74:07] connected him to my manager and I was [74:09] like, "This guy's legit." I'm like, [74:10] "You're funny, dude. Like, you're you're [74:12] good if you just [ __ ] stay." And then [74:15] had a bunch of personal problems, had a [74:17] kid think I think he had some legal [74:19] issues. [74:21] Damn. But that guy, I'm like, I'll tell [74:23] you later who it was. [74:24] >> No, I know who it was. [74:25] >> Yeah. Yeah. And but I [clears throat] [74:26] was like, that [ __ ] was funny. [74:28] He was funny. [74:29] >> Way funnier than I was. [74:30] >> He was great. He was a fun dude to be [74:33] around. He was a cool dude. [74:34] >> I was like, he's going to make it. [74:36] >> There was people I looked at and I go, [74:37] they're way funnier than I am. Holy [74:39] [ __ ] [74:40] >> We were both like the same age, too. We [74:43] were like 27 when I first met him. And [74:46] uh I connected with my manager and he [74:48] was like, "Nobody ever did anything like [74:50] that for me before." Like, "Nobody tries [74:52] to help me." [74:52] >> Nobody. I was like, "Listen, man. You [74:55] you'll do it too now. You'll make it and [74:58] then you'll do it, too. We'll all do it. [75:00] It's it it helps and it doesn't hurt. [75:03] Doesn't hurt you at all to help [75:04] somebody, but it helps them and it helps [75:06] you. It helps you feel better. You feel [75:08] better that you're helping someone. It's [75:10] like it's a like I always say that being [75:12] generous is kind of selfish in a way [75:14] because you feel better, too. Like when [75:16] I'm generous, I feel better." [75:17] >> I do. [75:18] >> Yeah. Yeah. We all do. And when we're [75:20] kind and when we try to help people, you [75:22] feel better. It's good for you. It's [75:24] good for everybody. And it's like that's [75:26] a message that the world needs to hear. [75:28] Like you could be good to people. And if [75:32] you're good to people and you're nice to [75:33] people, it'll help you too. And if you [75:35] find someone who's got something, you [75:37] got you got and you're doing a thing [75:39] like you're doing a thing and there's [75:40] someone who's got a spark, there's a [75:42] little talent, help though. Help them. [75:45] Help those people. Give them advice. [75:47] Give them a push. Let them open for you. [75:49] Let you know watch their set. give them [75:52] some feedback. Help them cuz you know [75:55] >> we're not in the comedy business, Joe. [75:57] I've never been in the comedy business. [75:58] I don't know what anybody's talking [75:59] about. We're in the karma business. [76:02] >> It's a little of that. [76:03] >> I'm in the karma business. I am not in [76:05] the com my my goal every day is to make [76:07] somebody's day. One person, a woman at [76:10] the supermarket. You're looking [ __ ] [76:11] bad in a [ __ ] today. Oh, stop [76:13] it, Joey. Yeah, that I just made her [76:16] [ __ ] day. Her husband sees her every [76:18] day and never tells her she's banging. [76:20] And I'm going up to this lady I don't [76:21] even know and I'm like damn if I was 20 [76:23] years younger you know they're older [76:25] than me like they don't you know [76:28] >> that's my thing every day just make [76:29] somebody's day one person you can't save [76:32] the world [76:33] >> but one day a gesture a handshake a [76:36] couple dollars is not going to set you [76:38] back. That is kind of what you if you're [76:40] if you're doing a thing where you're [76:42] doing something that people enjoy. Like [76:44] think about like your sets. Like think [76:46] about how many people have gone to see [76:48] you and you change their night. Gone to [76:50] see you. Like how many nights at the [76:52] store people come in, you want to see a [76:54] show? Yeah, let's go see a show. You go [76:55] on stage and rock that [ __ ] place. [76:57] They leave, they're holding their side [76:59] like and they go out and get something [77:00] to eat afterwards. NOBODY SAID THAT [77:02] [ __ ] THING ABOUT AND THEY'RE D like [77:05] change people's evenings. You change [77:08] their feelings. You change the way they [77:10] feel and you feel good because of it. [77:12] It's like this weird exchange. The [77:13] reason why we love killing. [77:15] >> Especially people that are really good [77:17] at it, what they love is that they're [77:19] making other people happy. That's really [77:21] what you love. [77:21] >> That's it. I love it. [77:22] >> You're making other people happy [77:25] >> and you feel happy because you're making [77:26] and when you don't Oh, you feel [77:28] terrible. [77:29] >> I feel I do better when I look at the [77:31] audience and they're laughing and I [77:32] laugh with them. Once I laugh, you're [77:34] done. [77:35] >> Yes. [77:36] >> You're done. Yeah. [77:36] >> Once I start laughing and giggling, [77:38] >> if it's real, [77:39] >> parties. Yeah. No, it's real. [77:41] >> You're having fun. [77:42] >> It's real. It's real. When I look out [77:43] there and I see somebody that should not [77:45] be laughing and they're laughing at [77:47] something blue as [ __ ] that I said and I [77:49] don't expect them to laugh, that's what [77:51] makes me laugh. Or the look on their [77:53] face from the shock of you saying [77:54] something. [77:55] >> That's what always kicks me into this [77:58] [ __ ] mode, you know? [77:59] >> Yeah. It's beautiful. The the other [78:01] thing I want to talk about in this [78:02] podcast cuz I was talking to a friend of [78:03] mine in Jersey standup [snorts] and this [78:05] is the other thing people don't see. [78:07] We're very blessed because we went to LA [78:09] or wherever the [ __ ] we went and one day [78:12] you're talking to somebody and two weeks [78:15] later [78:16] they're in a [ __ ] the biggest movie [78:18] in Hollywood. [78:19] >> Yeah. [78:20] >> And it's very hard to explain to people [78:22] to sit believe in yourself and just keep [78:25] showing up and that this happens. But [78:29] since people don't have see that happen [78:31] in their world, you know, in Jersey, [78:34] what do you see? A guy hits the lottery, [78:36] >> he can wins a million dollars. That's [78:38] their way out of this life. For us, it [78:42] was like [78:44] we had we saw too many people make it [78:46] like this. Like one day they had nothing [78:49] and the next day they're on CBS [ __ ] [78:52] doing a show for eight years with [78:53] whether it's Kevin or whether it's [78:55] >> [ __ ] uh the other guy, the great guy [78:57] from Pittsburgh. You've seen that. So it [79:00] gives you hope. Now at that situation, [79:02] you could say, "Fuck that dude. He's a [79:04] [ __ ] loser." You could go, "Good for [79:05] him. He just moved the notch up a little [79:07] bit so I could get on that conveyor [79:09] line." That's the beauty of it. Not [79:12] looking at that person going, "Fuck him. [79:14] He sucks. He stole my joke in [79:16] Pittsburgh. Who gives a [ __ ] about [79:17] Pittsburgh in ' 89? Guy's on TV now. You [79:21] know, whatever he is, be happy because [79:24] you're next. You know him. You [ __ ] [79:26] do sets with him, [79:27] >> right? [79:27] >> You're there in the rotation with him at [79:29] the store every night and off and it can [79:30] happen for you, too. [79:31] >> It happens. [clears throat] So once you [79:32] see it, you go, "Oh [ __ ] Okay, now I [79:35] know what I need to do." [79:36] >> That's if you're real. [79:37] >> That's if you're real. I need to get off [79:38] coke. I need to cut this [ __ ] out. I [79:40] need to do this, this, and this. Just to [79:42] get me closer to that because I see it [79:45] too much. I see people living in an [79:47] apartment with eight people and next [79:48] thing you know they got a house in [79:49] Beverly Hills. Most people don't see [79:51] that, [79:52] >> right? [79:52] >> So, it's tough to explain to them what [79:55] they because everybody thinks you're [79:56] going to hit the lottery in your life's [79:58] going to change. Boy, are they mistaken. [80:00] Everybody thinks $10 million going to [80:02] change their life and make them a better [80:04] person. It's not. It's not. We think [80:06] it's going to. Like when you were broke [80:08] all those years, you used to say, "I [80:10] can't wait to have money." [80:12] >> But you never said, "I can't wait to [80:13] have money for what?" I never thought I [80:16] would have money. [80:17] >> Me neither. [80:17] >> I never said I can't wait to have money. [80:20] My thought was I want to like make a [80:23] living. That's it. [80:24] >> That's it. That's why I was [80:25] >> Even when I first started with standup, [80:27] like it was just to make a living. It [80:29] was just doing this thing. I I was a [80:31] [ __ ] loser in like regular society. I [80:34] was good at kicking people. I was a [80:36] loser in regular society. I was like I I [80:38] didn't graduate college. I barely got [80:40] out of high school. I wasn't paying [80:42] attention. I I didn't care about school. [80:45] All I cared about was whatever I cared [80:47] about, whether it was drawing or whether [80:49] it was martial arts. Those are the [80:50] things that I cared about. That's it. [80:52] >> So, I always felt like I just need to [80:54] find a way to live because I I'm never [80:57] going to be a successful person. I had [81:00] like resigned myself to that. I had no [81:02] aspirations. [81:02] >> You [snorts] [81:04] [ __ ] No, you were way worse than me [81:05] because you were in and out of jail. [81:07] >> No, I had no family, felonies, no GED. I [81:12] was set to [ __ ] die. [81:13] >> Yeah. [81:14] >> And that little [ __ ] accident I had [81:16] in when I was 25 years old, you know, [81:18] it's like right now, you go, you look at [81:21] the news and there's this big thing [81:22] going on by the ice facility by my house [81:25] in Jersey in uh Newark. They keep [81:27] [ __ ] banging and I'm sitting there [81:28] going, [81:30] >> "Here's how stupid we are as Americans." [81:32] I don't know if Americans know this [81:33] [ __ ] When you go to jail, you lose all [81:35] your rights. You know why I don't go to [81:36] jail, Joe? Because that sleep apnea [81:38] machine doesn't mean nothing in jail. [81:41] We don't care if you die, [81:43] >> right? [81:43] >> You know what you have to do to get them [81:44] sleep apnnea machine in jail? You got to [81:46] go to a manufacturer. They have to send [81:47] it to you directly, which we'll get into [81:50] later. But my point is that [81:52] [ __ ] What was my point? I don't even [81:54] know. I got so high before. [81:56] >> Your point was that you never thought [81:58] you were going to go anywhere. [81:59] >> I never thought I was going to go [82:00] anywhere [82:01] >> until comedy came around and you [82:03] realized, oh, this is a thing that I can [82:04] do. [82:05] >> But all I wanted was 4,000 a month. In [82:09] my mind, I was such a loser that I said [82:10] to myself, if I can make 4,000 a month, [82:12] I'm a millionaire. [82:14] >> And today, 4,000 a month doesn't even [82:16] get you rent, [82:17] >> right? [82:17] >> Not even nothing. 4,000. [82:18] >> But back then, 4,000 a month was like [82:20] 8,000 a month. [82:21] >> Yeah. 8,000 a month now. [82:22] >> And you would say, okay, if I made a h [82:24] 100red grand a year, I can live like you [82:27] can live off 100 grand a year and be [82:28] comfortable. Like that's the goal. The [82:30] goal was always just to be comfortable. [82:32] But the thing with you is I've realized [82:34] this like very early on. you were going [82:38] to it was going to take a different [82:39] path. Like I remember watching like you [82:42] emerge when you really started like [82:45] killing on stage and I was saying and [82:47] then you know all these agents you [82:50] remember I had that one agent that would [82:51] get mad that I would take you on the [82:52] road with me. [laughter] [82:54] >> He would get mad. I was like what the [82:56] [ __ ] is wrong with he's not I don't [82:57] think he's funny. I don't think he's [82:58] talented. I go you don't know what the [82:59] [ __ ] you're talking about. You don't [83:01] know anything. I go why does he make me [83:02] laugh so hard? He's like well you're a [83:04] degenerate. Like you're a [ __ ] crazy [83:06] person. And you got to realize the [83:07] audience is offended and that's your [83:08] audience. Like shut the [ __ ] up. I knew [83:11] that you were a different path. So for [83:14] you, your emergence came with the [83:17] emergence of the internet. And when the [83:20] internet came around and we started [83:22] doing podcasts, I'm like, this is the [83:24] way that Joey's going to break because [83:26] they'll get to see the real you. [83:28] >> When I told stories, when I listen, it's [83:30] like 24/7 on HBO. You may hate [ __ ] [83:35] I don't know, throw any name up. You may [83:37] hate that boxer for some reason. He He's [83:39] whatever. He's cocky, but then they show [83:42] you his house and they show you he's got [83:44] four daughters and they show you that he [83:46] wakes up every morning and feeds the [83:47] daughters. You thought he was a [ __ ] [83:49] animal. In the cage, he's an animal, but [83:52] in life, he's just a regular guy. And [83:54] you get to see that and go, "No, I like [83:56] him. I don't see a guy that just punches [83:58] people in the head. I see a guy that's [84:00] Look at him. He's got [ __ ] makeup on [84:02] for his daughters and he's cooking [84:04] breakfast every morning. Then he goes [84:05] trains like that. Uh Jason, what was his [84:08] name? The big young brother from the [84:10] UFC, Alexander. Remember he came and he [84:12] was knocking heads and they found out he [84:14] couldn't do jiu-jitsu. Great guy though. [84:16] >> Houston Alexander. [84:17] >> Yeah. Yeah. [84:18] >> I watched that thing on him. He was [84:19] raising four girls. His wife, the crack [84:22] mom, left. [84:23] >> That dude was a tank. [84:24] >> He was a tank. And he would train in the [84:25] mornings, then go home, cook for the [84:26] kids. [84:27] >> Remember when he knocked out Keith [84:28] Jardine? Big upset. Big upset. [84:30] >> Big upset. Jardine just tried to take [84:33] him out and Houston Alexander was [84:34] throwing bombs. [84:36] >> He was big and [ __ ] strong. [84:38] >> Jacked. [84:38] >> Jacked. [84:39] >> And he was a radio DJ, [84:41] >> you know. He was a radio DJ. [84:42] >> I didn't know that. [84:43] >> Yeah. He was a hip-hop DJ. Find out [84:46] where Houston Alexander was. I'd love to [84:47] know where he is. Like a big DJ. Like he [84:49] was successful. [84:50] >> He always talked to me at the airports. [84:52] >> Very good guy. Very good. [84:53] >> Very good guy. I was like, "Wow." [84:56] But you know you I knew that once I was [84:58] able to tell my story where I came from [85:00] it was I w I didn't know how to do it on [85:02] stage. [85:04] >> Then after I done a podcast over the [85:06] years I got better enough to learn how [85:08] to do it on stage. [85:09] >> But you did figure out how to do [85:10] something on stage. That was the switch. [85:13] And the switch was you figured out how [85:15] to be Joey Diaz in the parking lot on [85:18] stage. [85:18] >> In stage that was the that was killing [85:20] me. [85:20] >> But it went like that. [85:22] >> Like that. I never saw anybody flip a [85:24] switch from struggling on stage to [85:26] crushing like you. I was like, "This is [85:29] wild." [85:30] >> And I'm going to tell you some of the [85:31] reasons. I was too focused on material. [85:36] You're too focused on your [ __ ] [85:37] material. And you know what? At the end [85:38] of day, your material sucks. I've heard [85:40] it already. And that's what I would [85:41] think in my mind. So, I would do better. [85:44] But when I went up there just with one [85:46] thought and attacked it, [85:49] >> you know what I mean? I mean, it's hard [85:50] to explain what I'm saying to you. Yeah. [85:52] No, you what you what you did was you [85:56] treated the audience like they were your [85:59] boys and we're all hanging out versus [86:01] treated the audience like I'm a comic. [86:03] Here's some jokes. Like when you first [86:05] started when I first What did I meet you [86:07] in '96? [86:08] >> 97. [86:09] >> 97. When I first met you, you were doing [86:12] jokes. Like you go on stage and do [86:14] jokes. [86:14] >> I would focus on the jokes on that [86:16] paper. Don't focus on that. At 11:30 at [86:19] the store, your jokes don't mean [ __ ] [86:21] They just saw three hours of top-notch [86:24] comedy. What are you bringing to the [86:25] table? You going to go up there and tell [86:26] me what I saw on the news? And who [86:28] taught us that? Paul Mooney. How to [86:31] relax? He would just go up there and in [86:34] my mind he was just vibing with the [86:35] audience. [86:36] >> He did a lot of that [86:37] >> and it worked. And I took that realm of [86:41] relax. [86:42] >> Mooney taught us a lot. [86:44] >> Relax. [86:44] >> He was a real veteran, you know. He was [86:46] like one of the only guys when we were [86:48] there that was there during the prior [86:49] years. probably [86:50] >> and was respected. [86:52] >> It wasn't like one of those There was a [86:54] few guys that were still hanging around [86:56] that had literally acts from the [86:58] >> They were still doing like Bruce [86:59] Springsteen jokes. No, [87:00] >> it was terri. It was just bad. [87:01] >> But his laidback [87:03] >> Yeah. [87:03] >> attitude. [87:04] >> Always topical, too. Always new [ __ ] [87:07] Anytime new [ __ ] was going on the news, [87:08] he had 10 solid minutes on it [87:10] >> and quick. [87:11] >> Yeah. [87:12] >> That day if it happened, you told on [87:14] news that night [87:15] >> that day. [87:15] >> I remember he was crushing on stage [87:17] once. We were dying in the back of the [87:18] room. He goes, "Oh, that's right. I [87:19] write, [ __ ] I write. [87:21] >> Yeah. No, no, he's [ __ ] We were [87:23] dying. [87:23] >> But that calmness taught me how to I was [87:26] going up there and rushing. [87:27] >> Yeah. [87:28] >> I was going up there doing two mistakes. [87:29] Rushing and worrying about that material [87:32] like it was Bible, [87:33] >> right? [87:34] >> I'll give you an example. [87:37] Sometimes I get an audition, right? When [87:39] I was doing a lot of auditions, this is [87:41] when I learned that early on when I was [87:43] auditioning that if I focused on that [87:45] line, those lines, I wasn't going to [87:48] book that part. [87:51] So I had to dip into Marlon Brando's [87:53] [ __ ] tools. Marlon Brando didn't read [87:55] [ __ ] He put those signs on you so you [87:57] felt more organic. But it wasn't even [88:00] that. It was know who your character is. [88:04] I could tell you to go [ __ ] your mother [88:05] 18 different ways. [88:08] Right. [88:08] >> Right. [88:09] >> So it's the same thing. You have to just [88:13] learn not the words but what he's trying [88:15] to say in there. You don't need the [88:17] words. The words are [ __ ] What is [88:19] this guy trying to say in there? Yeah, [88:21] you take some of the sentences that he's [88:23] saying, but you slow it down. And that's [88:25] what he did in that scene when he tells [88:27] everybody if my son should hang by a [88:29] bolt of lightning, [88:31] you then Marlon Brando in the hotel [88:33] scene. That's a beautiful [ __ ] scene. [88:36] If you love that [ __ ] like I do, all [88:38] those [ __ ] were wearing signs. [88:40] You've seen the the the behind the [88:42] scenes of that. [88:43] >> So the the their words, the script was [88:46] >> were on papers. So Duval was sitting [88:48] across from him with a billboard. [88:50] >> That's hilarious. [88:50] >> That boss was sitting across from and [88:52] you see him like he just look up [88:55] and that I will not forgive and he take [88:59] another pause and look at another Q card [89:00] and and because he wanted it to be [89:02] organic. [89:03] >> He didn't want it to sound like those [89:05] [ __ ] lines this writer wrote, [89:07] >> right? [89:07] >> And that's for everything. If you know [89:09] the character, I know the character. I [89:11] know me. [89:12] >> See, that's crazy. [laughter] [89:15] >> Everybody had science, dog. That is [89:17] really crazy. [89:19] >> But it is crazy. [89:20] >> Did it work [89:21] >> in The Godfather? Did it work? Okay, so [89:23] go [ __ ] yourself. It [89:25] >> was watching this thing where they were [89:26] very skeptical about him playing. [89:28] >> Oh, did you see the Sony thing? [89:30] >> Yeah. [89:30] >> The Sony series. Very good. [89:32] >> Yeah. Very good. Yeah. What an [89:34] interesting Imagine skeptical about [89:35] Marlon Brando playing the Godfather. [89:38] Well, brother, he had shot a movie, [89:40] Beutiny on the Bounty, and they went [89:43] down there, and the [ __ ] [ __ ] [89:45] that chick, and he wasn't even directing [89:46] anymore. He was in a hut. He gave like [89:48] the ad, the camera. You didn't hear [89:50] about that? [89:51] >> Yeah. [89:51] >> That's a huge story. [89:52] >> But that's Apocalypse Now, right? [89:54] >> No. And then Apocalypse Now, he went to [89:56] a meeting. They gave him all this loot [89:58] and they told him, "You got to show up [89:59] 180." Like, you're supposed to be a [90:01] Green Beret, [90:02] >> right? [90:02] >> He showed up 400. [90:04] >> Well, that's why they kept him in the [90:05] dark, right? that they kept him in the [90:06] dark and they shaved black shirt, you [90:08] know, he didn't give a [ __ ] He did it [90:10] however and that's why they hated him. [90:13] But at the same time, you got to love [90:14] the [ __ ] cuz it's working. [90:16] >> Yeah. Well, it was authentic, right? [90:20] >> Yeah. That Apple TV show was very [90:22] interesting. [90:23] >> It was [90:24] >> very And I I met that dude. Remember, he [90:26] created The Longest Yard. Al Ruddy did [90:29] the longest yard from scratch. When he [90:32] did the Godfather, [90:34] I think he didn't take two and he went [90:36] to do the longest yard. He loved it. So, [90:39] he created the longest yard. So, when we [90:41] shot our longest yard, he was there [90:42] every Friday for his little checky poo. [90:44] Big [ __ ] Big dude, dog. Good [90:47] dude. Big hands and [ __ ] Would just [90:50] talk to you about stuff. Good dude. So, [90:53] I got it like that [ __ ] you [90:55] know, be buddy. And I think he did [90:57] something else after that. Look at the [90:59] movies he did. Look at the movies here. [91:01] Jamie, when you get a minute, Paul [91:03] Rudy's films. [91:04] >> What was that other question that had [91:05] asked you earlier [91:07] >> about [91:07] >> I asked you to look something up? Forget [91:09] >> a DJ in Omaha. [91:11] >> Yes, Omaha. [91:11] >> Yes, Omaha. He was from Omaha. [91:13] >> That's what it is. [91:14] >> What radio station? [91:18] >> Is he still doing it? [91:20] >> Yeah, it says he currently is. [91:22] >> He currently is still. Look at that. We [91:24] got to call him. I think he fought [91:26] recently. I think he had a fight like [91:29] within the last couple of years. [91:32] >> Did he? [91:32] >> This says 2017 for MMA [91:35] box. Bare knuckle boxing in 2023. [91:38] >> That's it. [91:39] >> Yeah. [91:40] >> Won all four of his bare knuckle fights. [91:42] >> Yeah. [91:43] >> Bare knuckle fighting. Dude's a DJ. UFC [91:46] veteran. Said, "Fuck it. Let's get some [91:48] bare knuckle fights in." [91:49] >> How [ __ ] great is that that you could [91:50] DJ and then go fight somebody on [91:52] >> Crazy. Yeah. [91:53] >> And that's life, man. That's a life [91:56] that's worth living. You got your money. [91:57] You're getting your money's worth. [91:59] You're getting your money's worth. You [92:00] want to sit at home, be senary, [92:02] whatever. Live like, you know, watching [92:03] TV and you're scared they're going to [92:05] bomb you. You're done. You got to keep [92:08] [ __ ] living. That's what you know. [92:09] >> Yeah. You got to do things. That's the [92:12] thing about life. You got to do things. [92:13] Too many people just sit around wanting [92:15] to do things and not doing anything. [92:17] It's hard to get moving, though. That's [92:19] what a lot of people find. They find [92:20] it's hard to like go out to that club [92:23] for that first open mic, step into that [92:25] gym the first time. Like D-Rod, uh [92:27] Daniel Rodriguez, did you see that [92:29] podcast? We talked about how he got [92:30] arrested in Tijana. [92:32] >> You know D-Rod from the UFC? [92:34] >> Yeah. [92:35] >> So D-Rod uh beats Kevin Holland, right? [92:38] Goes to uh San Diego celebrating and his [92:40] boys like, "Let's go to Tijuana." [ __ ] [92:42] yeah. Let's go to Tijuana. Just go to [92:44] drink, have a good time. Just won a huge [92:46] fight. top 15 UFC welterweight [92:50] has an ounce of weed in his bag. He [92:52] thinks, "Well, weed's legal in [92:54] California. Weed's decriminalized in [92:56] Mexico. Who cares? Maybe I'll bribe [92:58] somebody. I'll get out of this." It's a [93:00] federal offense to bring weed in. And [93:02] even though weed's decriminalized in [93:04] Mexico, it's not for visitors. It's only [93:06] for Mexican citizens. [93:10] >> Yeah, bro. [93:11] >> How do you get out of that one? [93:12] >> Well, one of the things he had to do is [93:13] become a Mexican citizen. [snorts] [93:15] So he's got dual citizenship now. Yeah. [93:18] He was in jail for [ __ ] eight months, [93:19] man. [93:20] >> Oh my god. [93:21] >> Yeah. He was just training in jail. He [93:23] looks great. He looks great now, but [93:24] when he got out, he was he's like, I had [93:26] no protein. So I'm in there working out [93:28] every day with [ __ ] eating noodles [93:30] and and potato chips. [93:31] >> No protein. [93:32] >> No protein. And so he he got real thin. [93:35] Like he showed a photo of him like the [93:37] day he got out. I mean, this [93:38] [ __ ] was training every day, [93:39] twice a day in jail. He's like, I'm [93:41] going to make the most out of this. But [93:42] it's he has no food. The food's [93:45] terrible. So his body had wasted away. [93:47] >> I think I used to get protein. [93:48] >> He couldn't. He asked. He tried to get [93:50] it. He said, "You get girls, you get all [93:51] these different things." He goes, "He [93:53] couldn't get [ __ ] good food [93:54] >> in Mexico." [93:55] >> In Mexico. Yeah. [93:56] >> And he was a cellmate with a cartel guy. [93:59] The cartel guy took care of him. The [94:00] cartel guy recognized him. Look, we'll [94:02] take care of you. Hang out with us. And [94:03] he just said, "I'm going to keep my nose [94:04] down. Just train." But he said he got a [94:06] bunch of guys training with him because [94:08] they they were inspired. They're like, [94:09] "Fuck yeah, let's train with D-Rod." So [94:11] he had he had all these guys in there. [94:13] He said some of them were [ __ ] [94:14] talented. Prison's fun. [laughter] I [94:16] don't give a [ __ ] what anybody tells [94:18] you. Once you get to your destination [94:21] and you meet your homies and you create [94:23] a little thing, it's like anything else. [94:25] We just can't step out the walls. But [94:27] you make it happen. Like I laughed a lot [94:29] in there, bro. I laughed. [94:31] >> I bet you did. [94:32] >> Because nobody's funnier in prison than [94:33] black people. I don't give a [ __ ] what [94:35] they tell you. They're the true kings of [94:37] the prison system. And I had the two [94:39] best. I had I was I had the two best. [94:42] And you know sometimes that [94:43] >> that's where you first did stand up, [94:45] right? [94:46] >> First did stand up just for the inmates. [94:48] >> Yeah. Wednesday, Thursday night. [94:49] >> They just talk some [ __ ] [94:50] >> during the movies. They would go, "This [94:51] movie sucks." They would be like PT 109, [94:54] you know? We don't want to see [ __ ] [94:55] Kennedy in a movie. Get up there, Cuba. [94:57] And I would just go up there and [ __ ] [94:59] around and it [95:01] >> it was nothing that was I ever thought [95:03] about anything. Like I You said [95:05] something before thinking about the [95:07] first time you went to that open mic. [95:08] Boy, was that scary for me. [95:10] >> Terrifying. [95:10] >> Took me eight months. I was such a [95:12] [ __ ] I would call the Comedy Works in [95:14] Denver every week and every week I'd [95:16] cancel Dem. Oh, I don't feel good. And [95:21] then my ex-wife, God bless, as much as I [95:23] hate her, she heard me on the phone and [95:24] she has her mother to babysit. And she [95:27] drove me down and I got on stage. I [95:29] remember getting off that stage going, [95:30] "How am I going to do this? I'm married [95:32] with a kid." And three months later, she [95:35] came home. She's like, "You're a loser. [95:36] I don't want to be married to you no [95:37] more." I'm like, "Yes." [laughter] Holy [95:40] [ __ ] you just did me [ __ ] solid. [95:44] Then she did me shitty afterward, but [95:46] the point is she at least got me to that [95:48] open mic. So, I have to be grateful for [95:50] something that she did. You know, [95:51] >> it's the hard the first step's the hard [95:53] one. You know what I was saying about [95:55] D-Rod, like the first time he ever went [95:57] to the gym, his uh girlfriend got him a [96:00] membership. She was like, he's cuz he [96:02] drove by it a bunch of times. He thought [96:04] about training, never went in. you had a [96:06] bunch of street fights, never went in. [96:08] He's like, "I think I could do that." [96:10] And then finally, she's like, "Look, I [96:11] got your present. I got your [96:13] membership." [96:14] >> Hold that thought. Can I go pee real [96:16] quick? We're at the 2our mark. [96:17] >> We'll be right back. [96:18] >> We'll be right back. I got to go pee. [96:20] >> And [96:22] we're back. [96:23] >> That was a tremendous pee. [laughter] Oh [96:25] my god. [96:26] >> Cuz the worst is when you try to [96:28] concentrate and you have to piss like [96:29] >> No, that's the worst. [96:30] >> You can't fall. [96:31] >> That's the [ __ ] worst. When you have [96:32] to drive and [ __ ] you got to pee. And [96:35] I'm to an age I just pull over. [96:37] >> Yeah. So [96:38] >> highway, whatever. I pull I open up the [96:40] both doors and I make believe I'm [96:41] looking for something and that dick is [96:43] out peeing like I pee on the little leaf [96:45] field and now I got after surgery they [96:47] gave me a handicap sparking. I'm living [96:50] like a doctor. You don't know what life [96:53] is until you have handicap parking dog. [96:56] You just pull right up and pick a spot. [96:59] >> Always. [97:00] >> Yeah. [97:01] >> Like 4 feet away. When I got in the [97:03] mail, dog, I was happier. That made me [97:05] so happy. [ __ ] walking. When I go to [97:08] events now in Philadelphia, I just pull [97:11] up and [ __ ] put a neck brace on, walk [97:14] out and [ __ ] Oh, it's been beautiful. [97:16] Joe, [97:17] >> what do you have to do to get one of [97:18] those? [97:18] >> The doctor, [97:19] >> that's it. So, [97:20] >> the doctor was like, "Oh, do you have it [97:21] after surgery? I get a feed for 6 [97:23] months." [97:24] >> And then he goes, "Hold on one second." [97:25] He went online. He's like, "Dog, you [97:28] qualify for everything. You got [97:29] everything on this list. Everything. [97:31] Go." And they gave it to me for [ __ ] [97:33] like 3 years. [97:34] >> Oh, nice. [97:35] >> Yeah, I [ __ ] Oh, tremendous. Joe, [97:38] >> how does it feel right now? You're all [97:40] right. [97:40] >> Yeah, it feels okay. I just listen, what [97:42] happens is you do something every week. [97:45] Like the second week I went, third week [97:47] I went couple weeks I went boxing and it [97:50] was good for like three times. And one [97:52] day I went and I had a plan 25 minutes, [97:54] eight rounds on the bag or the speed [97:57] bag, but I do the bags and I alternate [97:59] the bags. Sure enough, round number six, [98:01] one of the guys comes over. He goes, [98:02] "Joey, let's hit the mids." I'm excited. [98:05] You know, he's a young guy. Let's do it. [98:07] I left. My [ __ ] leg blew up from that [98:09] right punch to cross cuz everything [98:11] walks into it. [98:12] >> You're also moving around with [98:13] >> You're moving around. So, I said, "Fuck [98:15] it. Now I got to stand in front of the [98:16] bag." So, I learned my lesson. [98:18] >> And then last week, I went to PT and [98:21] that [ __ ] had me. I mean, I love [98:23] him, but TJ, this [ __ ] had me [98:26] doing deadl lifts and wall squats with a [98:29] thing with your weight on the back and [98:31] you go all the way. [98:32] >> So, it's all just to strengthen the [98:33] muscles back. [98:34] >> You have to You have to strengthen. But [98:35] I prepped. I listened to you guys. I, [98:37] you know, I did everything I could [98:39] before the surgery. That's what made it [98:41] easier. Made a lot easier. I called you. [98:44] I told you I was doing [ __ ] in 5 days. I [98:46] didn't have a cane no more. You know, I [98:48] was done. I I started driving at 8 days. [98:50] Not because I couldn't, but because I [98:52] was sick and tired of my wife driving me [98:54] places [98:54] >> and I got to, you know, argue with her [98:56] in the right hand lane. [98:57] >> No problem. [98:58] >> Yeah. Like a [ __ ] [98:59] >> Wow. That's crazy. [99:00] >> So, it was the right foot, which is the [99:02] accelerated brake combo. So, yeah. [99:05] >> But, yeah, I was out of the house. You [99:06] know, the pain pills were done after 8 [99:08] days. Then I had to bring them back for [99:10] PT. They were [ __ ] killing me after [99:13] PT. So after PT, you pop one, go home, [99:16] put ice on it, rub it down with the [99:18] cream, and stay off it for an hour or [99:20] two, but then at night, I take a walk [99:22] around the neighborhood. You could [99:23] you're trying to strengthen this [ __ ] [99:25] >> right? [99:25] >> You know, we're talking about it [99:26] outside. Let's let's say you're in a [99:27] hospital for 5 days and you eat cereal [99:30] for five [ __ ] days. You gain weight, [99:33] >> your muscle breaks down and goes away. [99:35] Like five days, stay in a hospital. It [99:37] could [ __ ] kill you just because, [99:38] again, there's not that much protein. [99:40] You're not getting 150 grams of protein [99:42] a day. You're not moving [99:44] >> and you're not moving. So [snorts] [99:45] >> that's the big one. [99:46] >> I prepped for [clears throat] the [99:47] surgery. I took all the supplements ways [99:49] to well told me everything. Besarine. I [99:52] took [ __ ] My [ __ ] piss is like glows [99:54] in the dark at night. Purple [snorts] [99:56] yellow. It's [ __ ] amazing. I did all [99:59] my PTS, all my BPC's 157, all my TB500s. [100:04] I did them for [ __ ] to the tea like [100:06] they told me to. And you know, listen, [100:09] I'm 63 and it's a 63 year old knee. So, [100:12] I don't expect to be in the UFC fighting [100:14] no Gary next week, but I could walk [100:16] around and enjoy life with no [ __ ] [100:18] pain. Or no, it's not pain. It's like [100:20] you always have an issue. You know it. [100:22] >> Yeah. [100:22] >> You always have that thing with your [100:24] knees. Sometimes it sticks. Well, then [100:26] you got to do simple [ __ ] You got to [100:28] get your a piece of paper, put on the [100:30] floor, and just roll your heel back and [100:32] forth 20 times and do kicks when you're [100:34] sitting around. All those things help [100:36] the knee. You get that band and you put [100:38] it around your leg and you just [100:39] straighten out your leg. I do that at [100:41] home. This is [ __ ] I do at home, you [100:43] know, instead of watching TV. It takes [100:44] 15 [ __ ] minutes. 15 [ __ ] minutes [100:47] of your time. And I got the bull worker. [100:49] They sent me a bull worker. [100:50] >> What's that? [clears throat] [100:51] >> The thing I told you last time about [100:53] it's isometric [ __ ] [100:54] >> Oh, okay. [100:55] >> So, I did the bull work. I did the [100:57] deadlifts at the bull worker. Now I'm [100:58] [ __ ] cuz I don't know how to change [101:00] the strings. So, I got to learn how to [101:02] [ __ ] change the strings. But that's [101:03] all it was. It was preparing for the [101:05] surgery, [101:06] >> right? You can't just go in there and [101:08] not strengthen the little muscles around [101:10] the area. Yeah, [101:12] >> that's it. [101:13] >> Yeah, you got to do something. It's very [101:15] important, especially if you're going to [101:16] go into surgery. I know a lot of people [101:18] that have had knee surgery and didn't do [101:20] that. And it's a big [101:21] >> They won't go to PT. It's like, you [101:23] don't go to PT. What the [ __ ] is wrong [101:25] with you? [101:25] >> Yeah, [101:26] >> that's They came Listen, I had the [101:27] surgery Thursday. Went in my house [101:29] knocking Friday [ __ ] afternoon. I was [101:31] home Friday from the hospital and they [101:33] said, "They're coming over today. [101:36] That [ __ ] had me going up and [101:38] downstairs, walking outside with the [101:40] cane, getting in and out of the tub. He [101:42] was I don't even have a tub. I have a [101:43] walking shower. But he was like, I'm [101:45] going to do everything with you. So, it [101:47] was pretty [ __ ] like I said, this [101:49] surgery was a lot better. The company [101:52] that I did business with was a lot [101:54] better. Last time I did it at Sennate, [101:57] that's like a medical network in New [101:59] Jersey. Not bad. They have a great [102:01] facility there. But you know when I went [102:04] to do the surgery, my acupuncturist [102:05] said, "When you go talk to that guy the [102:08] day before the surgery, ask him about [102:10] the sanitary conditions at the [102:12] hospital." [102:13] So when I went, I said, "Hey, what's the [102:15] sanitary conditions at the hospital?" [102:16] He's like, "Ah, you hear rumors. [102:19] And then when I went for the surgery, [102:21] they prepped me up. They gave me [102:22] everything. They gave me the IV. They [102:24] were right about to do that thinging you [102:26] right back." And he said, "We're not [102:28] doing the surgery. I don't agree with [102:30] sanit." I was pissed, but I'm like [102:32] happy. I could have ended up [102:33] >> Doctor didn't agree with the sanitary [102:34] conditions. [102:35] >> He came out and said, "Oh, no, not [102:37] today. We'll do it next week at a [102:39] different hospital." [102:40] >> What? [102:41] >> Yeah, [102:41] >> that's So, what were people getting [102:43] Mercer or something? [102:44] >> Something that Mercer in there, and [102:45] they're like, "No." Everybody was [102:46] telling me, "Be careful with the Mercer [102:48] in that hospital." [102:48] >> Oh, Mercer is [ __ ] terrifying. [102:50] >> But the funny thing was he gave me a 20 [102:52] milligram oxy, which they never gave [102:53] you. [102:54] >> That's a strong [ __ ] And I [102:56] forgot I took it. Remember I told you? I [102:58] forgot. I'm in a Chinese restaurant [102:59] yelling Gino. I'm like, what [laughter] [103:01] the [ __ ] is wrong with me? Oh [ __ ] I [103:03] took that 20. I was [ __ ] up for 8 [103:05] hours on that thing. [103:06] >> So they give it to you before the [103:07] surgery? [103:08] >> Yeah, just one other precocion. They did [103:10] that. The [103:10] >> a precaution. [103:11] >> Yeah, precaution. Whatever the [ __ ] [103:13] [laughter] [103:13] So you don't wake up in the middle of [103:15] surgery yelling and [ __ ] screaming [103:16] like a [ __ ] [103:18] They do that. The epidural. The epidural [103:21] was tough because I felt it in my nut [103:22] sack. Like they give you a couple shots [103:24] and one of the shots made me actually go [103:26] like this cuz I felt it on the bottom [103:29] towards the end of the nut sack. Not the [103:31] meat potatoes part but towards the end [103:33] close to the muffler. [103:38] [laughter] [103:38] >> I was like this is not bueno dog. [103:41] >> What is the thing they do? Uh I I saw [103:43] this video online about it. It's like I [103:46] think it's called nerve ablation. I [103:48] might be making that up, but they they [103:49] literally like cut the nerves off when [103:51] people have back pain. Like some people [103:54] with back pain, it's like they're in [103:55] constant nerve pain and they were [103:57] showing how they just snip the nerves [104:00] and I was like, "Wait, wait a minute. [104:02] Could is that hinder your movement? Like [104:04] what is what happens there? Is this it?" [104:07] >> Mhm. [104:08] >> Yeah. So, what is that? Radio frequency [104:11] ablation for back pain management. What [104:13] does it mean? Like what does that what [104:15] do they do? Cuz the way I was looking at [104:17] online, I'm like, it looks like they [104:18] just cut the nerves. A minimally [104:20] invasive outpatient procedure uses heat [104:23] to intentionally damage nerves carrying [104:26] pain signals from the spine to the [104:28] brain. Primarily provides long lasting [104:30] relief for chronic back pain caused by [104:33] arthritis or facet joint degeneration. [104:36] Wow. But does does that mean your back [104:39] just keeps getting worse, but you don't [104:40] feel it? [104:43] What happens when you do that? Duration [104:47] back, please. Uh, the procedure [104:49] typically takes 30 to 60 minutes. You [104:51] could usually go home the same day. Pain [104:53] relief is not immediate. Often takes 1 [104:55] to 3 weeks for the nerve to fully [104:57] settle. Relief typically lasts anywhere [104:59] from 6 to 12 months. Although it can [105:01] last for several years for some [105:02] patients. Are the nerves permanently [105:04] destroyed? No. The nerves regenerate [105:06] over time. When the nerve grows back, [105:08] your pain may return, but the procedure [105:10] can be repeated. [105:12] What is the recovery and risks? What's [105:14] the risks? Uh, complications are rare [105:17] but include infection, bleeding at the [105:19] insertion site, temporary numbness, or [105:21] skin irritation. Oh, normal stuff. Huh. [105:27] Interesting. Pain. That's nuts, man. [105:29] Just shut off the pain. You kind of want [105:31] to know if it hurts, though. No, I would [105:33] imagine like you're doing more damage if [105:35] you're if it hurts, [105:38] >> right? [105:38] >> It's like cortisol. you're numbing it, [105:40] right? [105:40] >> And then it keeps getting worse, but you [105:42] don't feel [105:43] >> Well, especially cortisone. With [105:45] cortisone, you can only do that so many [105:47] times for like joints like it can [105:50] degrade tendons and stuff cuz some [105:52] people their knuckleheads, they just [105:54] keep getting cortisone shots. Next thing [105:55] you know, your shoulder falls apart. [105:56] >> Yeah. You don't know. That's the worst [105:58] thing. [105:58] >> Yeah. You could tear tear. [106:00] >> That's what they'll let you do if you [106:02] let them. So, this is what I'm saying. [106:03] Unless you check out what option Listen, [106:05] it's 2026, man. [106:07] >> I'm scared of needles. And I'll tell [106:09] you, half my life I [ __ ] up because I [106:11] was scared of needles. If I would have [106:14] just I don't know what it was. I was [106:16] just scared of needles. Now I'll [ __ ] [106:19] take a needle wherever the [ __ ] you want [106:21] to give it to them. [laughter] [106:22] >> You know what I'm saying? Like now you [106:23] can shoot me while I'm standing up. I [106:25] don't [106:25] >> Once you get used to doing peptides, [106:27] needles don't mean [ __ ] [106:28] >> And those are diabetic needles. They [106:29] don't do [ __ ] [106:30] >> It's like It's good to stop taking [106:32] medicine if you don't want to. [106:33] >> Ah, that makes sense. So [clears throat] [106:35] if you're in pain anyway. So a success [106:38] rate is 70 to 85%. [106:41] It's most stressful when the procedure [106:43] targets the medial branch nerves [106:45] responsible for facet joint arthritis. [106:47] Success typically refi defined as 50% or [106:50] greater reduction in lower back pain. U [106:52] better physical function. Reduced need [106:54] for pain medication. That's big because [106:56] some people they're just [ __ ] in [106:58] especially back stuff. Some people are [107:00] just in agony every day. they wake up [107:02] and they're just in agony and it's a [107:05] long road back, you know, to get in. If [107:08] you have back pain, it's a long road to [107:10] heal that [ __ ] And you got to be very, [107:12] very smart about it. And you got to [107:14] stretch. That's one thing that a lot of [107:16] people don't like to do. A lot of lower [107:18] back pain. You a lot of that is just [107:21] everything's tight and you can stretch [107:23] and relieve a lot of that [ __ ] A lot of [107:25] that. [107:26] >> Yoga comes in handy. You don't go [107:27] anymore, do you? You don't go anymore. [107:29] >> I do a lot of yoga things though. a [107:31] house. [107:31] >> I haven't. Yeah, we actually have a yoga [107:33] room in the studio. I've never used it. [107:35] We got a heated room. We could crank [107:37] that [ __ ] up to 105 degrees and do [107:40] >> I haven't done the red light. I'll tell [107:41] you what else I did after the surgery [107:43] that worked. The hyperbaric chamber. [107:45] >> Oh yeah, that's big. [107:46] >> I did that twice a week. I still got [107:48] >> for recovery. For recovery, that's [107:50] fantastic. [107:50] >> And my oxygen levels are always low. [107:52] Joe, I got to figure I got to talk to [107:54] ways too well tomorrow. Every morning I [107:56] wake up 88%. You know, I'm always in the [107:59] red zone. I got to cuz I think lack of [108:01] oxygen is helping me burn fat and a lot [108:03] of other [ __ ] I My oxygen's at 88 some [108:06] days. 8 [ __ ] five. [108:08] >> Why would that help you burn fat? [108:10] >> Because you need oxygen to do [108:12] everything. You need oxygen for a [108:13] [ __ ] fire. [108:14] >> So if you have low oxygen, you burn fat. [108:16] >> How can you recuperate? How can you [108:18] fully recuperate with no oxygen in your [108:20] [ __ ] I think I don't [ __ ] know. [108:24] I'm not sure that's correct, but I think [108:27] that [108:28] um the more you exercise, the more [108:31] you're going to get oxygen in your [108:33] system for sure. Hyprobaric pain chamber [108:35] will help, but once you're like fully [108:37] healed up and you can really exercise on [108:39] a regular basis, it'll get back to [108:40] normal. [snorts] [108:42] >> No, because I do breath exercise every [108:44] morning. That's what you have to do. You [108:45] have to breathe through your nose like [108:46] 10 times and then hold it and then I [108:48] take the [108:49] >> What do they think is causing it? The [108:50] low oxygen. [108:51] >> They don't know. [108:52] >> They don't know. [108:52] >> They don't know nothing. They don't know [108:53] nothing. They don't want to find out [108:54] nothing. [108:55] >> But I'll take the cord and the the clip [108:57] that you put on your finger and put on [108:59] my ear. It gives you a better read. [109:01] [laughter] [109:03] >> What's more accurate [109:05] >> so far? The ear for me. I learned that [109:07] from an old Filipino lady. Oh yeah. [109:09] >> In the hospital. She had all the tricks. [109:11] >> So I do that. I test it. You know, when [109:13] I wake up in the morning, I have it. I [109:14] check my blood pressure like twice a [109:16] day. It's the best it's been in 20 [109:18] [ __ ] years. [109:19] >> I think some of those Fitbits can do [109:21] that [ __ ] now. Can they do that? What [109:23] >> do they measure oxygen levels? [109:27] >> Some of those um really advanced [109:29] wearable devices can measure oxygen [109:31] levels too now I think. Are they Is that [109:34] real? [109:36] >> Or is it? [109:37] >> Yeah. Yeah, they all do. They all do. [109:38] That's part of the deal. They measure [109:40] your uh heart rate heart rate variable [109:43] >> like those wearables like the wrist [109:44] stuff. [109:44] >> Yeah. [109:45] >> Oh, really? [109:45] >> So, I'll tell you what I got in mine. I [109:47] got uh [109:49] the [ __ ] in the mornings. It tells you. [109:51] >> What are you wearing? A Whoop. [109:52] >> Whoop. Yeah. Within [109:53] >> It does that. The Whoop tests oxygen [109:55] levels. [109:57] >> No, [109:59] it has respiratory rate. [110:01] >> I got to get back on the Whoop. I used [110:03] to use it all the time, but they got [110:05] they've gotten even better. [110:06] >> Yeah, they This one is a lot better. My [110:07] heart rate's good today. My oxygen is 91 [110:10] because I'm here with you. [110:12] >> And my uh skin temperature is minus one. [110:14] So, it texts all that [ __ ] I uh my [110:17] problem with wearables is all these [110:19] tattoos. So like this. Oh, okay. It's [110:22] reading it now. This reads my heart [110:24] rate. This is a Garmin. It reads my [110:26] heart rate some. All right. Now it's not [110:28] like it doesn't read through the tattoos [110:30] very well. I have to like move it around [110:31] [snorts] to get [110:32] >> [ __ ] insane. [110:34] >> Yeah, [110:34] >> that's [ __ ] insane. [110:35] >> You can't read through the tattoos [110:37] because the ink's in the way. Doesn't, [110:39] you know, it's it's it's literally using [110:41] some sort of a visual um system. It's [110:44] like it's light. Like if you look at the [110:46] back of the watch, there's a there's [110:49] like a light back there. See? [110:51] >> Yeah. I have the same. [110:52] >> So that is flashing into your uh veins [110:56] and then it somehow or another gets [110:58] information from that and that's how it [111:00] tells you the same thing. [111:02] >> Yeah. So the problem is all these [111:03] tattoos I thought about like removing my [111:07] tattoos just around the whole the circle [111:09] where the watch goes just like go get it [111:11] lasered. I might do it because I don't [111:14] see that anyway. I'm always No, [111:16] >> I always have a watch on and so like now [111:18] it's reading. [111:19] >> They're speaking about, you know, [111:21] burning your nerves and all that [ __ ] [111:22] and that thing that [111:24] >> I remember one year I had a fung I still [111:26] got a fungi toenail but I had the really [111:28] bad fungi toenail and I saw a thing in [111:31] group on for a company in Studio City [111:33] that blowtorched it with heat for six [111:36] sessions. [111:36] >> It kill the fungus. [111:37] >> Yeah. No, it never worked but I went [111:39] anyway. And the lady would put like a [111:41] mask on, would [laughter] [ __ ] And [111:43] she'd look at my toe like you would see [111:45] a [ __ ] And as she was burning it, you [111:47] could smell the fungus burning. It [111:50] smells like dead [ __ ] [ __ ] [111:53] >> And she would be there and I would ask [111:55] her questions so she'd have to pull the [111:57] mats off, [laughter] [112:02] take a whiff of this [ __ ] fungi [112:04] toenail. Oh, there's times I buff it out [112:07] myself now cuz nobody will buff it out [112:08] for me. Like I can't take it to a [112:10] Chinese woman. They'll lose their mind. [112:12] >> Can you put like antifungus cream on it? [112:14] >> I put everything on it. It's too deep. [112:15] It just fungus runs deep. This is [112:18] [laughter] This is the fungus I brought [112:19] back from Cuba. It and it's it [ __ ] [112:22] pops up from time to time. I get under [112:24] my tit like it just the fungus just [112:26] grows. I don't know what I have to eat. [112:27] Like some days I eat something and it [112:29] backfires and I get all these fungus [112:31] marks. I get all itchy and [ __ ] out of a [112:33] creep. [laughter] [112:36] But this [ __ ] burnt that toe for six [112:39] weeks. And every week I would ask her [112:40] more creepy questions. [laughter] She [112:42] would have to take that mask off and [112:45] smell that fungus. Dog. It was horrible. [112:48] When [laughter] she would walk out, she [112:49] closed the door like I was like, "Nope." [112:52] And the thing never worked. She never [112:54] burned me once. But she was serious with [112:56] that blow torch. [112:57] >> It didn't work. [112:58] >> No, it did nothing. I told you the [113:00] fungus is too deep. So they to get rid [113:02] of that, you have to do a liver test to [113:04] see how strong cuz the zapping is [113:06] [ __ ] hard on your body and it's [113:08] really hard on your liver. So my liver [113:10] didn't cut it, so they can't zap me with [113:12] that medication. [113:14] >> Did you hear about that lady who had [113:16] Alzheimer's, she couldn't talk anymore. [113:18] They gave her five grams of psilocybin [113:20] mushrooms [113:21] >> and she's singing opera now. [113:23] >> All a sudden she came back. Started [113:24] talking. [113:26] >> They said she hadn't talked in a long [113:27] time. She could remember things. [113:31] I know for a fact I got a good buddy of [113:33] mine that stuted. That was his childhood [113:35] thing. Every time he smoked crack, you [113:37] should have seen that [ __ ] Not [113:38] a strut in there. He talks to you [113:40] straight. [113:41] >> Paul, you know Paul Stamuts, the [113:42] mushroom expert. He's been on this [113:44] podcast many times. He's an illegitimate [113:46] micologist, like a scientist. [113:48] >> He had a horrible stutter when he was a [113:50] kid. Took 10 grams. [113:52] >> Gone. [113:53] >> Gone. [113:53] >> Gone. It's unreal. And people will still [113:55] go, "Nah, mushrooms are deadly. They're [113:57] going to kill you. [ __ ] you." [113:59] >> Isn't that crazy? You need to see the [114:00] devil every once in a while in your [114:02] life. And that's what people don't. They [114:03] don't see the downside because eating [114:05] those mushrooms from time to time makes [114:06] you step out like THC does and makes you [114:08] look at yourself and make like a [114:10] judgment call on what the [ __ ] you're [114:12] doing with your life. [114:13] >> What are you doing with your life? Are [114:14] you chewing that [ __ ] zin and talking [114:16] at the same time? [114:16] >> Yeah. I I don't know. I don't have big [114:18] enough [ __ ] gums, I guess. I don't [114:20] know. Don't stay there. [114:21] >> Yeah. It's the the real problem is that [114:24] it's illegal. You know what they should [114:25] do with that? You know what they did [114:26] with Colorado with 39% tax? Make [114:29] mushrooms 100%. Tax it 100%. We'll still [114:32] buy them. People will still buy. Make it [114:34] legal. Tax it 100%. You know how much [114:36] [ __ ] money they would generate. And I [114:38] guarantee you Well, I was going to say [114:41] people wouldn't be doing more mushrooms, [114:43] but they definitely would [114:44] >> if you' be good for everybody. [114:46] >> Listen, the only thing that stalls [114:47] people from mushrooms is the taste. Most [114:49] people put it in the grinder and then [114:51] they put it in capsules and they do it [114:52] that way. All different things. [114:54] >> That should not be a hurdle in 2026. You [114:56] told me you were going to get that [114:58] property a couple years ago, which you [114:59] didn't get. [115:00] >> Mhm. [115:00] >> I thought you were going to grow [115:01] mushrooms out there. [115:02] >> Like get somebody to set it up and Joe [115:04] Rogan's mushrooms. [115:05] >> Why? I would never do that [115:06] >> with your [ __ ] recipe. Like [115:08] >> no, it's that's that's not legal. I [115:10] would [snorts] uh it's not legal any [115:13] federally. That's the problem. I mean, [115:15] this is part of what Trump is trying to [115:17] change with this psychedelics act. [115:19] >> So all that [ __ ] was made illegal in [115:22] 1970. It was the Nixon administration, [115:24] the Controlled Substances Act. If that [115:27] hadn't happened in 1970, we would be [115:30] living in a better world. Like [115:31] legitimately, we would be living in a [115:33] better world. You'd have way more people [115:35] having access to this stuff. Way more [115:37] people that could get over whatever the [115:39] [ __ ] their hurdle is, whatever problem [115:41] they have, whatever it is. It's not for [115:44] everybody. There's a lot of people that [115:45] shouldn't do it. There's a lot of people [115:46] that are schizophrenic and that they [115:48] just need one mushroom trip and they're [115:51] gone and they're never coming back. [115:53] There's a lot of people that are hanging [115:54] on. They're hanging on. And one edible, [115:58] >> one mushroom trip, one one one meeting [116:02] with the devil and they never come back. [116:04] That's true. But those people were [116:05] already [ __ ] That's the problem. But [116:07] for the rest of us, for the rest of the [116:08] world, which is like most things, like [116:12] some people eat a Brazil nut, they're [116:14] dead, right? Some people eat peanuts and [116:16] they're dead. They have a deadly allergy [116:19] to peanuts. I could eat peanuts all day [116:21] long. [116:21] >> Can you look up how many people die [116:22] every year from [ __ ] peanuts? [116:24] >> It's quite a few. [116:25] >> Come on. [116:25] >> Yeah, it's quite a few. It's kind of [116:27] shocking. Some [116:29] >> Why? [116:29] >> Well, here's the really crazy thing. [116:31] [snorts] A lot of people think it has to [116:33] do with vaccines. They think, this is [116:35] Brett Weinstein's proposal, is that when [116:38] you take that vaccine, so there's [116:40] aluminum in the vaccine that's an [116:42] irritant, right? And this is what fires [116:44] up your immune system. And then there's [116:46] the dead virus. So your body develops [116:48] these [116:48] >> anti one to four annually. Give me [116:50] >> a lot of people. [116:51] >> Huh? [116:51] >> It's a lot of people. [116:53] >> No. Four people. [116:54] >> Four whole people. What about in the [116:56] world? How many people die for about [116:58] It's four in the world cuz none of them [116:59] die anywhere else. [117:01] >> Food allergies in general responsible [117:02] about 100 deaths. [117:04] >> Yeah. This this all made up white people [117:07] [ __ ] [117:08] >> Well, there's a few people though that [117:09] just avoid the peanuts. But there are [117:11] people that if they get peanuts they'll [117:13] die. Brett Weinstein thinks it has to do [117:16] with eating peanuts right after you've [117:18] been vaccinated and that something I [117:20] don't know if he's right but something [117:22] about your body reacting is the reason [117:25] why your body creates this antibbody to [117:26] the dead v the dead virus that's in the [117:28] vaccine. You know, if you give someone [117:30] um whatever it is, any figure out [117:32] whatever the disease is, you have a dead [117:34] virus and then you have this irritant. [117:36] And so the two of them together, your [117:39] body reacts to this aluminum and it used [117:43] to be um um what is the other [ __ ] they [117:47] don't put in it? There was mercury, [117:49] ethyl mercury and methyl mercury. The [117:51] two different types of mercury they've [117:52] tried to do that in vaccines, but [117:54] there's problems with that, too. [117:55] Obviously, mercury is toxic. So is [117:57] aluminum. But he thinks that if you have [118:00] aluminum from this vaccine and you're in [118:03] contact with other things at the same [118:05] time, you could develop an an allergy [118:07] for those things, whether it's wheat, [118:09] gluten, whether it's animals, whatever [118:11] it is. Like it's possible, he believes, [118:14] to develop an allergy when you get [118:16] vaccinated. And he thinks that's with [118:18] the rise in vaccines and the rise in [118:21] food allergies, he thinks those are [118:22] connected. [118:22] >> Let me ask you this. [118:23] >> I don't know if he's right. If you went [118:25] to your great your grandfather in [118:27] Newark, he's an immigrant and came over [118:29] and you told him you had a peanut [118:31] allergy, how many times would he smack [118:32] you in [clears throat] the [ __ ] face? [118:34] >> Well, he wasn't a violent man. He was [118:35] great, [118:35] >> but still he go, "Joe, what the [ __ ] [118:37] Peanuts?" [118:38] >> He would make fun of it. [118:39] >> I grew up on pine nuts every [ __ ] [118:41] day. Two pine nuts. I'm [118:43] >> I was loyal to maple syrup. [118:44] >> Well, the idea of being allergic to [118:46] bread back then was preposterous. First [118:48] of all, he would get bread like every [118:50] two days. They would go down to the [118:52] local Italian bakery and buy Italian [118:54] bread. That's the only bread everybody [118:56] ate in the house. [118:57] >> It's so funny. Like I didn't even [118:59] appreciate it back then. Like when I'd [119:00] have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, [119:02] I'd be like, "Why do they give it to me [119:03] on this [ __ ] thick bread?" Cuz you [119:04] got to cut the bread. Yeah. You know, [119:06] I'd be like, "Give me some [ __ ] white [119:07] bread." Like a real person. [119:09] >> Well, some Wonderbread. That's what I [119:10] wanted. When you're a kid, you want [119:11] Wonderbread. [119:12] >> I love Wonder. [119:12] >> Peanut butter and jelly sandwich on a [119:14] like I'd get whole wheat. I'd be like, [119:15] "What is this horseshit?" [119:17] >> I think you'd be in prison. What is this [119:18] terrible [ __ ] shitty brand filled [119:21] wheat with [snorts] all the the [ __ ] [119:24] chunks of wheat that's in it? Get the [119:26] [ __ ] out of here with your whole wheat [119:27] bread. I hated it. Now I love it. Now [119:30] it's the only like if I see like regular [119:32] white bread, I'm like never eat. [119:33] >> Let me ask you this. That bread that [119:35] your grandfather was getting. [119:36] >> Yeah. [119:36] >> In Hoboka in Newark. [119:38] >> Newark. [119:38] >> Two blocks away. They were old school [119:40] Italian people. [119:41] >> They made everything in the 70s and 60s [119:43] with all the [ __ ] that's in now. [119:44] >> I remember the bags. Yeah. White paper. [119:47] paper bag. [119:48] >> Yeah. And the the fresh tasted great [119:50] phenomen [ __ ] great with a piece of [119:51] butter. When you dip it in the pasta [119:53] sauce in the red sauce, you go [ __ ] [119:54] crazy. [119:55] >> So good with butter. You put butter on [119:57] that bread and you dip it in that pasta [119:58] sauce. Holy [ __ ] [119:59] >> So I got to stop eating muscles. [120:02] >> All right. That's my favorite dish. [120:04] Muscles with spicy with medium. Yeah. [120:06] Because you can eat a loaf of bread. I [120:08] can't. My body can't [ __ ] do that no [120:09] more. [120:10] >> Especially with the red sauce. [120:11] >> Oh, a loaf of bread. Oh, they'll go [120:13] through the whole loaf [120:14] >> with the butter or the olive oil on the [120:16] bread. You need all that [ __ ] I said I [120:18] can't eat muscles no more. I love [120:19] muscles. [120:20] >> I go to Rudy's. I got some muscles. [120:22] They're big. They look like a [ __ ] [120:24] chick a six look like a sixoot woman's [120:26] [ __ ] They're that [ __ ] big [120:28] [laughter] the muscles. You think I'm [120:30] kidding you? These [ __ ] [ __ ] muscles. [120:32] When I go to other restaurants, you get [120:34] those little muscles, then you get a [120:35] couple big ones. No, no, no. They give [120:37] you nine big chick gorilla raised [120:41] [ __ ] [ __ ] clits and they're [120:43] [laughter] huge and they put a little [120:44] sauce on it. [120:45] >> So good. [120:46] >> Oh my god. Makes me go [ __ ] [120:49] >> There was a Thai place that I used to go [120:50] to in LA. Thai food and they had muscles [120:53] and big [ __ ] spicy muscles. They were [120:55] huge. [120:57] >> So good. Oh, [120:58] >> not the tie place Eddie took me to. The [121:00] one next to the [ __ ] tent planet on [121:02] on Labraa. [121:04] >> Oh yeah. I went in there with Eddie one [121:06] night and I already hate Thai food. [121:07] Eddie, come on. I'll buy you lunch. I'm [121:09] broke. [121:10] >> You don't like Thai food? [121:11] >> I went in there, there was ants on the [121:12] wall. [laughter] [121:14] >> I'm like, "What the fuck?" But I like uh [121:16] the one that you took your shoes off. [121:18] They had the best shrimp pate in the [121:21] country. [121:21] >> You took your shoes off? [121:22] >> Yeah. There's one on Sunset right across [121:24] from the comic book store. [121:26] >> Toy [121:26] >> toy. [121:27] >> Oh, Toy Tie. Toy. Oh, that place legit. [121:30] >> Solid place. [121:30] >> Very good place. The best place ever was [121:32] what's the place next to the Laugh [121:34] Factory? [121:36] >> Green Blast Del. [121:37] >> Green Blast Del. [121:37] >> Oh, that was that was a great joint [121:39] >> until I tell you this story. I'm in [121:40] there with Ralphie May one day and he [121:42] gets a roast beef sandwich [121:44] >> and he's eating the roast beef and I [121:46] could see the ants on his arm [121:48] >> and he opens it up and there's ants all [121:50] over the sandwich. Listen to me. He [121:51] called the waiter. The waiter still [121:52] charging for half a sandwich. [groaning] [121:55] >> That's hilarious. [121:56] >> I was like, he's like, I ain't paying [121:57] [ __ ] This [ __ ] had ants on it. [121:59] I didn't even eat the other one. The [122:01] ants were on his [ __ ] arm. Joe, [122:04] >> they weren't in the sandwich. They were [122:05] on [122:05] >> They were in the sandwich, too. [122:07] >> Oh, so it was just all over the place. [122:08] >> It were all over the place. [122:09] >> Green blats. [122:10] >> Green blats, which I'll still eat that. [122:12] I don't I don't even think it's [122:13] >> What is that? [122:16] >> I only ate there a few times, which is [122:17] weird because it was right next door to [122:19] the Laugh Factory. [122:20] >> It was good, too. [122:21] >> I kind of stopped going to the Laugh [122:23] Factory after a certain point. It was a [122:25] certain point in like the 2000s where [122:27] I'm like, I think I'm done with this [122:28] place. And I was mostly at the store. [122:31] >> Yeah, I like the Laugh Factory and I [122:32] like the improv. [122:33] >> I was like at the store. I love the [122:34] improv still. I always did the improv [122:36] still, but the Laugh Factory to me was [122:38] like there was something about it that [122:40] was like sterile. There was something [122:42] about it. Not a bad thing, but it was [122:43] like very much like a lot of people got [122:46] TV deals out of the big different kind [122:49] of comedy. [122:50] >> Yeah. [122:51] >> You know, it was uh the store was the [122:54] dream. You know, the Laugh Factor was [122:56] nice and everything, but then it was [122:58] also like, you remember Scott Day? He [123:00] would discourage, he would try to [123:01] discourage you from going to the Laugh [123:02] Factory. He's like, "You're a comedy [123:03] store comic. You're not laugh." I'm [123:05] like, "Listen, man. I got to go up [123:07] everywhere. I can't I'm developing. I [123:09] can't be just limiting myself to one." [123:11] >> But after a while, you're like, I [123:12] develop better at the store. [123:14] >> Well, this thing about the store too, [123:15] you got three totally different [123:17] environments. You got the belly room [123:19] environment, which is like very [123:20] intimate, very small, 70 people. And [123:23] then you got the O, which is the gritty. [123:26] That's that's the psychopaths at 11:30 [123:29] on a [ __ ] Tuesday night. And then you [123:31] got the main room, which is the big [123:32] show. There was so much opportunity. [123:34] >> I [ __ ] always hated the main room for [123:36] the last 5 years I was there. I just [123:38] couldn't get the formula for it. But the [123:40] original room, I knew it like [123:43] everything. [123:44] >> The original room, you're locked into a [123:45] living room. [123:45] >> You're locked into it. And that's and [123:47] then the piano and the whole [ __ ] [123:49] thing. [123:50] >> The main room was big, big stage, big [123:53] crowd. It was big ceiling. Everything [123:55] was big. It was different. It was a [123:57] different kind of a show. [123:58] >> Remember the first time I showcased for [123:59] Jamie? He's like, "Man, what are you [124:01] doing here? You belong in Las Vegas, [124:04] man, in a showroom. You're not an LA [124:07] comic." That's hilarious. [ __ ] [124:09] >> Jaime always had the craziest ideas for [124:11] people. [124:11] >> But he at the end, he was a really good [124:13] guy. At the end of the day, he really [124:15] tried hard. Well, he loved comedy. [124:16] >> Yeah, he loved comedy. All those people [124:18] were very nice. You know, I just went to [124:20] Nashville for the comedy festival. [124:21] >> Uhhuh. [124:22] >> And I ended up doing the Old Osprey. You [124:24] know that theater there. What's the name [124:25] of the theater? [124:26] >> Randol Opry. [124:27] >> Yeah. [124:28] >> And it was great. But the great thing [124:30] about that that everybody from the [124:31] improv was there last night. I saw [124:33] people that were there for 25 years and [124:36] we just were dropping stories. Aaron, [124:39] the guy Hartman, Hartman looks great. [124:41] He's a big peptide guy, big everything [124:44] guy. He lives in Nashville. Uh Joel from [124:48] Florida. [124:49] >> Oh, [124:49] >> you know when you get to see those guys [124:51] and you're like, "Wow, we've been in [124:52] this [ __ ] together [124:54] >> forever." [124:54] >> Like I told Aaron, I met Aaron in [124:56] Irvine. Then she came to Hollywood and I [124:59] was like psyched cuz she gave us an [125:01] 11:00 show and she was pregnant. She was [125:03] hot. She used to wear the farmer those [125:06] things that [125:07] >> overalls. [125:08] >> The overalls. Oh, she [laughter] was so [125:10] hot. I still tell them when I talk to I [125:12] always tell Aaron you sexy savage. I [125:14] always [ __ ] torment her. But it was [125:17] really nice to see them and everything [125:20] you know Harmon me told the story when I [125:22] told him I was going to bang his head [125:24] off the wall. You know just craziness [125:26] that look at us now. We're all in there [125:30] having a great time. 20 years ago we [125:32] were always at war with one of you guys. [125:34] We cursed too much. You know we were [125:36] talking about when I got fired with [125:37] Pablo. [125:38] >> Yeah. Yeah. [125:39] >> And then he found out I wasn't doing [125:40] coke and he felt really bad, you know. [125:42] So, [125:43] >> it was uh it was just great to see what [125:45] we've been through together. And now [125:47] after everything, you're like, "Fuck." I [125:49] was there the [ __ ] night Joel [125:50] started. [125:53] >> That was in Miami, right? [125:54] >> That was in Miami 98. [125:56] >> New Year's of 99. [125:57] >> That's crazy. [125:58] >> And Madonna came in with Chris [ __ ] [126:00] rock. [126:01] >> Wow. and to watch somebody New Year's [126:03] Eve. I forget who the [ __ ] it was, but [126:06] yeah, that's you look at those people [126:08] like we took the ride. We were kids. We [126:10] were [ __ ] kids together. [126:11] >> And also, you have to think like imagine [126:14] having to [126:16] employ you. Imagine being a businessman [126:19] and you got to employ you in 98. [126:22] >> God bless him. [126:23] >> Not good. [laughter] [126:25] >> God bless him. [126:26] >> I remember the improv really liked me [126:28] and I [ __ ] him over in like 200. [126:30] >> Who was the guy? The original guy at [126:32] Coconut Grove. [126:34] The guy who liked to party. [126:35] >> I forget his name now. Rich Jeff. [126:38] >> Give me a minute. [126:40] >> Yeah. [126:40] >> Give me a minute. [126:41] >> The original guy. [126:42] >> Yeah. Crazy. [126:43] >> Crazy. [126:43] >> Fun guy. [126:44] >> Really fun. He's from Cleveland. He [126:46] lived in Cleveland. [126:47] >> Like the party [126:47] >> and his wife hit the lottery for a [126:49] million dollars. [126:50] >> People didn't realize how nutty Coconut [126:52] Grove was. That was the nuttiest improv. [126:54] That improv. We would go out afterwards [126:56] and have Cuban coffee and eat Cuban [126:58] sandwiches till like 2:00 in the [127:00] morning. [127:01] >> Go to that news thing, the news stand. [127:03] >> Yeah. [127:03] >> It was open till 5:00 and it closed for [127:05] an hour. [127:05] >> Tell stories. Yeah. [127:07] >> And you could drink till all night. But [127:09] >> Oh, yeah. [127:09] >> So they [snorts] closed from 5 to 6, but [127:12] whatever booze you had on the table, you [127:14] could keep. So you would say, "Give me [127:16] like eight beers." And then they would [127:18] open up again at 6:00 and you're right [127:19] there. Hey, [laughter] [127:21] >> it closed for 1 hour. [127:23] >> At 5 in the morning. [127:25] I remember one night you were on Conan [127:27] O'Brien. This is 97, right? [snorts] No, [127:32] you did somebody's late show. [127:34] >> Okay. [127:34] >> It was the week that our friend got [127:36] shot. [127:37] >> Oh, the Hartman thing. [127:37] >> Hartman thing. You can't believe I [127:40] remember. See, I'm just telling you that [127:41] I don't know [ __ ] Look up the dates [127:43] when Hartman got shot. You were on that [127:45] show. like you were with me all weekend [127:48] and I stayed and then you went to New [127:50] York to shoot that and then that weekend [127:52] Hartman, you know, but I'll never forget [127:55] I was involved in the threesome when you [127:57] were on that talk show and I'm it's a [128:00] chubby chick and a hot chick and we're [128:02] snorting coke and I'm trying to eat ass [128:04] and I'm looking at you. I go pull on put [128:06] on NBC. So, I go watch Joe and I'm [128:08] watching you as I'm trying to tackle [128:10] these two animals and I'm [laughter] [128:11] like, "Who the [ __ ] going to believe [128:14] this?" The chubby chick got up. She's [128:16] like, "You didn't want to be with me [128:17] anyway. You always wanted the hot [128:19] chick." And slammed the door. It was a [128:20] full night. It was a [laughter] full [128:22] night, though. [128:25] >> Cocaine. [128:27] >> But all that [ __ ] you see these people [128:29] now and you're like, "Bro, we all went [128:30] through it together." [128:31] >> Yeah. [128:32] >> We all went through it together. [128:34] What a great [ __ ] thing to have at [128:36] this time in your life that we all we're [128:38] all here, you know? [ __ ] really nice, [128:41] man. It makes you go, "Wow, this comedy [128:44] life was worth every [ __ ] penny I got [128:46] into it." It was a fun ride when you [128:48] look back and you think like, imagine [128:51] when you were first starting out. [128:52] Imagine that it would turn out this way. [128:55] You never imagined it. And then you look [128:57] back, what a fun ride. What an [128:59] extraordinarily fun life. I'll never [129:02] forget and you had it pinned down from [129:04] the beginning. I never even told you [129:06] this. [129:07] One of my I got to LA like January 97 [129:10] and that summer like August. [129:12] >> That guy. [129:14] [clears throat] [129:14] >> Nope. [129:16] >> No, that's Cleveland improv. [129:17] >> I know it says he owned the uh one in [129:19] Miami, too. [129:20] >> Oh, no. It was the manager. [129:22] >> Oh, [129:22] >> no worries though. Thank you. Sorry. [129:24] >> What are we talking about? [129:26] >> Uh something pinned down. Manager. [129:31] Who [ __ ] knows? [129:32] >> We were talking about [129:36] Oh, never imagining that. Looking back [129:39] on this life, like when you first [129:42] started, I would never imagine it would [129:43] turn out this way. [129:44] >> You said something about me once that [129:46] was right. Like I wasn't on the podcast, [129:47] but you were talking to somebody. You're [129:49] like, I remember when that guy first [129:50] came on the scene. He was scary. He had [129:52] a leather jacket and all this [129:53] [clears throat] [ __ ] and he was [ __ ] [129:55] wild. You know, I just got to LA and I I [129:58] do a couple spots. Uh the guys at my my [130:01] first talent coordinator at the improv [130:03] said to me, "Hey, would you like to work [130:05] Irvine or and I go, "Yeah." He goes, "I [130:07] got an MC spot. Go do it next week." My [130:10] first time I go down there and I had a [130:12] the crazy girlfriend then with all the [130:13] teeth. [130:14] >> Oh yeah. [130:14] >> And this [ __ ] head chef comes [130:16] up to me and her and he goes, "Hey, [130:18] she's got the same mouth as Gina Davis, [130:21] the nice [ __ ] mouth." That was my [130:24] first weekend ever. And at first I took [130:26] it kind of weird. And then I after the [130:28] show, I went up to him and I go, "Hey [130:30] man, who the [ __ ] do you think you are [130:33] saying something like that?" He goes, [130:34] "What are you doing? If you go at me, [130:35] you'll never work on improv again." I [130:37] just kicked him in the [ __ ] stomach [130:38] as hard as I could. They called me the [130:40] next day. Go, come on, man. I kicked [130:42] him. The guy fell apart. All of a [130:44] sudden, he wasn't a tough guy no more. I [130:45] was just so pissed. How can you say that [130:47] to somebody's [ __ ] girlfriend to a [130:49] face? I just [ __ ] front kicked him [130:51] and I hit him somewhere in the stomach. [130:53] He was holding on. I'm calling Hartman. [130:54] Call [ __ ] Hartman. I don't give a [130:56] [ __ ] I remember getting in the car [130:59] going, "Joey, you can't let the old Joey [131:00] get in the way, man. This is not good. [131:03] You should have just walked away." But [131:04] no, why would I walk away? [ __ ] that [131:06] [ __ ] That was the problem. A lot of [131:08] people would walk away from that [ __ ] [131:10] and you just lost. You just became a [131:11] Hollywood [ __ ] When you say [ __ ] [131:13] you, they'll respect you [ __ ] more a [131:15] year later. And they did. They ended up [131:17] giving me more work. So, [131:18] >> was that guy still there when you went [131:19] back? [131:20] >> No. He was like a a cute cook that [131:21] thought he was cute. like he Orange [131:23] County, he wasn't gonna get smacked. I [131:25] don't give a [ __ ] who you are. [gasps] I [131:27] [ __ ] kicked that [ __ ] I [131:29] didn't give a [ __ ] Jack. I was so buck [131:31] wild at the store in the beginning when [131:33] I hit the kid in the head with the [131:34] microphone [131:36] and then they came and got me in La Hoya [131:38] and I took the pool c the pool. Remember [131:40] they had that pool table in La Hoya? The [131:42] bumper they had a bumper pool table in [131:45] La Hoya, [131:45] >> right? [131:46] >> So these guys kept threatening me that [131:47] they were going to come games. So I got [131:49] I became [ __ ] uh [131:52] Chuck Norris and Code of Silence. [131:53] [laughter] I took all the pool balls and [131:56] I put them in different places so I had [131:58] to throw them at him as a weapon. Then I [132:00] hit all the [ __ ] pool cues. You ever [132:02] see Code of Silence? That's Seagal stole [132:05] it from him in that [ __ ] Bobby Loop [132:07] movie. But that was that was Chuck [132:09] Norris when he would fill a bag with [132:11] pool cues and hit you in the head with [132:13] it and [ __ ] in the pool hall with the [132:14] Colombians. [132:16] >> Doug and that [ __ ] I saw them. [132:18] I was sitting outside the comm the La [132:20] Hoya storm. They had that little bench [132:22] facing the Chinese restaurant. You don't [132:24] remember La Hoya no more. And I saw them [132:25] at the light and they made the turn and [132:28] I took one of those balls and I kept it [132:30] right here and they pulled up and took [132:32] water pistols out and I [ __ ] took [132:35] that ball and threw it with everything I [132:37] had and hit that car and all of a sudden [132:40] the [ __ ] car went boom. These [132:42] [ __ ] took off. Jack [132:45] >> code of silence. I remember this because [132:47] this was like the first like real movie [132:51] that like got respected by it wasn't [132:53] just a karate movie. It was a movie that [132:56] was about like an undercover cop movie, [132:58] right? Wasn't it [132:59] >> against the Colombian? [133:00] >> But it was the the fighting part was [133:02] just part of it. [133:04] >> It wasn't that it was, you know, it was [133:06] just a karate movie like most of his [133:08] other movies were just karate movies or, [133:10] you know, they were kind of campy like [133:12] missing in action. It was a lot a lot of [133:14] it based on the karate. THIS WAS OH, WE [133:17] GOT hit by the pool ball. Oh, they jump [133:20] him. This is a terrible movie. [133:22] >> This is ter This is [laughter] terrible. [133:24] I thought men [133:25] >> It was the [ __ ] back then, [133:27] >> but it's so When you watch it now, [133:28] you're like, "This is the corniest fight [133:30] scene of all time. These [clears throat] [133:30] guys would overwhelm him." [133:33] >> Listen, man. Uh, [133:36] >> good men wear black. [133:39] Chuck Norris had a couple movies where [133:41] he showed his [ __ ] This was not one of [133:44] them. Walker, Sheriff Marshall was not [133:47] one of them, [laughter] okay? With the [133:48] wig doing push-ups still on channel 89. [133:51] That wasn't him. I love Chuck Norris, [133:53] but Chuck Norris made some good movies [133:55] early on that were dark. That's why [133:57] nobody talks about Good Women Men Black. [133:59] What's the other one? The Octagon. [134:00] >> Oh yeah. [134:01] >> You forget about all those. [134:02] >> Oh yeah. Is this Good Men Good Guys Wear [134:04] Black. 1978. [134:07] Wow. [134:09] How many [ __ ] people did this guy get [134:11] into martial arts? Like how many people [134:14] because of Chuck Norris movies wind up [134:16] doing martial arts? A [ __ ] shitload. [134:20] >> I got into Tank Sudo because of him [134:23] >> because he was one of the first Tang [134:25] Sudau guys. Then he split. [134:27] >> He made his own thing or whatever the [134:29] [ __ ] [134:31] >> It's It's kind of amazing when you think [134:32] about how many karate guys didn't make [134:34] it. [134:36] >> Like how many guys didn't become karate [134:39] movie stars and Chuck Norris did? Like [134:42] how many of them were there? How many [134:43] karate guys wanted to be movie stars and [134:45] couldn't figure it out? And he did. [134:47] >> I saw every martial arts film made in [134:49] the 70s, even with the black [134:51] exploitation. The movie was called Three [134:53] the Hard Way. Jim Brown, Jim Kelly, and [134:57] other really good black. [134:58] >> What about Jim Kelly? [135:00] >> Jim Kelly was trying to break into that [135:02] thing. There was a lot of guys, a bunch [135:03] of movies. [135:04] >> And then after Bruce Lee died, the whole [135:06] thing opened up. Yeah. Jet Lie, Jet, [135:09] Bruce, [135:10] >> Bruce Lie. You had all these [ __ ] [135:12] bruises and that just that that was the [135:14] end of it. But I was notorious. I went [135:16] to see all those [ __ ] movies growing [135:18] up. Billy Jack. [135:22] >> You don't remember Billy Billy? [135:23] >> I remember Billy Jack. [135:24] >> The Indian. [135:24] >> Oh yeah. I remember. I remember the [135:26] black hat. I remember the whole damn I'm [135:27] going to put this foot on the side of [135:29] your face. All that [ __ ] damn thing. [135:31] >> They even had a white Mormon dude be [135:33] martial. Everybody Chinese, black, [135:35] everybody played [ __ ] kung fu. [135:37] Everybody. And that movie Code of [135:40] Silence is Dennis Finina's one of his [135:42] first movies. He's Oh, really? Yeah. [135:44] He's a sidekick in that movie. [135:45] >> Ah, [135:47] >> [ __ ] just, you know, people forget [135:49] how many kung fu movies or martial art [135:52] based movies they actually made in the [135:54] 70s. [ __ ] unreal. [135:56] >> Oh, yeah. Unreal. [135:56] >> And the [ __ ] that was getting sent here [135:58] from China, it's like uh kid porn. They [136:00] were just sending it every weekend. [136:02] [ __ ] Chinese people beating up on [136:04] Chinese people, jumping. Remember the [136:06] more they got older, like by 70s, Bruce [136:08] died in 73. By 76, there was movies that [136:11] the guy had like a thing of gold, it [136:13] weigh like 10, two tons and he would [136:15] throw it up a hill and then jump and [136:17] catch it on top of the hill. Come on [136:18] now. You lost me. The one-armed [136:20] swordsman. You lost me. You know, the [136:22] guy's got one arm and he's [136:24] >> Some dudes love those kung fu movies. [136:26] They were completely forget about black [136:28] people. recreate like you know when [136:30] people talk about Bruce Lee it was a [136:32] sensational cultural [ __ ] phenomenon [136:36] when he came [136:37] >> and [snorts] the people that think about [136:38] all the people he opened up to martial [136:40] art movies and martial arts in general I [136:42] mean oh yeah [136:43] >> Chuck Norris was the second half of it [136:45] you know Bruce was the first Chuck [136:47] Norris was the second and I hate to [136:48] admit it UFC is the third big wave of [136:52] that that yeah [136:53] >> you know nobody goes to karate no more [136:55] okay how many karate schools you got [136:57] it's for kids 10. They make them hit a [137:00] paper, [137:00] >> you know. [137:01] >> Yeah. They're going to jiu-jitsu schools [137:02] now. [137:03] >> They're going to all different schools. [137:04] So, [137:05] >> it's changed. The culture has changed. [137:07] You know, in 73, everybody went to Wing [137:09] Chong Kung Fu. [137:10] >> Yep. [137:11] >> You taught judo, you became a Wing Chung [137:13] dude now because you weren't going to [137:15] make no money off judo. Nobody was doing [137:16] judo back then. You had to go to [137:18] Brooklyn to get Savat classes. Remember [137:21] Savat? [137:22] >> Yeah. [137:22] >> The French? [137:23] >> Yeah. [137:23] >> You had to go to Brooklyn. In those [137:25] days, New York had everything. But then [137:27] when like our friend, the one who does [137:29] the MMA podcast with you, Matt Sarah, [137:31] when Matt Sarah got into jiu-jitsu, he [137:33] would have to go from Long Island all [137:36] the way to like close to Philadelphia. [137:39] It'd be 3 hours on Sundays. Jiu-Jitsu [137:42] wasn't everywhere yet. When he got into [137:44] it, he would have to travel. He I think [137:46] he told the story, one of his podcast, [137:48] [snorts] he would have to drive to [137:49] Jersey just on Sundays. They just did [137:52] jiu-jitsu on Sundays cuz that's all that [137:54] was available. M [137:55] >> now you got a jiu-jitsu school at every [137:57] [ __ ] corner. And who's that because [137:59] of? That's because of the UFC, man. It [138:01] just blew it the [ __ ] right open. So, [138:04] who knows? I may be wrong. [138:06] >> No, I think you're right. For sure. The [138:08] UFC opened up Brazilian jiu-jitsu. Hoist [138:10] Gracie. Hoist Gracie winning the first [138:12] UFC's that opened up Brazilian jiu-jitsu [138:15] all over the country. [138:16] >> Saying, "What the [ __ ] is this?" [138:17] >> Yeah. It was a completely new I mean, [138:18] there was no Brazilian jiu-jitsu in [138:20] America. You never even talked about it. [138:21] I did martial arts my whole life. I've [138:23] never even heard of it. you heard of it, [138:25] but [138:25] >> I don't even know if I so far off to [138:27] you. [138:27] >> I barely even paid attention to it. It [138:29] was like it could have been anything. [138:31] And then all a sudden the UFC came [138:32] along. It's like, oh my god, that's the [138:34] thing that everybody needs to learn. [138:36] >> That's what's wild now. It's like how [138:38] many people trained martial arts in [138:40] comparison to like 50 years ago. It's [138:42] not There's no comparison. There's way [138:44] more people that know how to fight now [138:45] than like ever before and ever before. [138:49] >> Or at least they know how to neutralize [138:51] somebody. [138:53] Well, a lot of people are training now. [138:56] People learn to neutralize people. [138:58] Anybody who studies jiu-jitsu ain't [138:59] going to bully bully you, [139:01] >> okay? They're going to neutralize you on [139:02] the street. What are you going to do? [139:04] Break your [ __ ] shoulder on the [139:06] street. They're trying to neutralize [139:07] you, hold you down. Hey, take a breath. [139:09] Relax. Don't swing at me cuz I'll break [139:12] this [ __ ] arm. Relax. [139:13] >> Do you ever see the video of Matt Sarah? [139:15] I think it was in Atlantic City [139:16] >> and it might have been Vegas somewhere [139:18] in a casino. Some drunk guy is causing [139:21] problems and Matt winds up taking him [139:23] down and mounting him until the the cops [139:25] come. He's just holding on to the guy. [139:26] He's just sitting on the guy holding on. [139:28] There it is. The guy's swinging. Look at [139:30] Matt. Like you've got a literal [139:32] Brazilian jiu-jitsu world champion and [139:35] he's just mounting you laughing. Like [139:38] you think about picking on the wrong [139:40] guy. [laughter] He's just holding I mean [139:42] the guy's completely helpless. [139:45] I don't remember the whole story behind [139:47] this. Look at the security guard coming. [139:49] And I was like, "Relax. I got this guy." [139:50] >> You and I both know Mac could kick him [139:52] in the face and get up and leave. [139:54] >> He could literally [139:54] >> This is what I'm telling you. The [139:55] jiu-jitsu that atmosphere doesn't teach [139:58] you to do that. He just holds you down [139:59] going, "Hey." [140:00] >> Well, he has nothing to prove. You know, [140:01] >> no. Catch your breath. [140:03] >> He's laughing. World champion. I mean, I [140:05] don't know if he had been the UFC [140:07] champion by that time, but you know, [140:08] >> what are you going to do? Kamar somebody [140:09] on the street and break their shoulder? [140:11] Now you have to live. You're going to go [140:12] to jail. You're going to get sued. You [140:14] lose everything. [140:15] >> I know jiu-jitsu people take you down [140:16] like they're bouncers. Yeah. [140:18] >> Did he just neutralize you? It [140:19] >> was the night before his Hall of Fame [140:20] induction to the [laughter] [140:23] >> 2018. [140:25] >> Okay. So, that's way past the time that [140:26] he won the title. Yeah. That's [140:28] hilarious. That's That's very funny. [140:30] That poor guy. Imagine like knowing that [140:32] guy could have killed you and he was [140:34] just so nice. All he did was hold your [140:36] wrists and sit on your chest for a [140:37] little while. [140:37] >> Look at him. He look like he was on a [140:39] boat having a good time. He's like, [140:40] "Hey, somebody get me a water or [140:42] something." [140:42] >> He's the guy's literally helpless. He [140:44] has no fear whatsoever of that guy [140:46] hurting him, you know? It's like it's [140:48] like a child. It's like your little [140:50] child's having a temper tantrum. Like, [140:52] come on. It's [snorts] Matt's terror. [140:54] It's funny. There's so many dummies out [140:56] there. This is a part of the problem in [140:58] this world. It's hard to get your [ __ ] [140:59] together. So many people just stumble [141:01] through life just never getting their [141:03] [ __ ] together. [141:04] >> [ __ ] my friend last night. She has [141:06] like a cooking show on YouTube. She [141:09] goes, "I had to stop doing it, Joey." [141:13] He goes, "My mother would watch and [141:14] these people would say like the weirdest [141:17] like you know everything, show me your [141:19] tit, show me your [ __ ] you can't cook, [141:20] [ __ ] [laughter] [141:22] and you're like, you know, how much [141:24] longer am I going to take this [ __ ] [141:26] for?" [141:26] >> People are so horrible. [141:27] >> They're [ __ ] horrible on the [141:28] internet. You know, he's this young girl [141:30] looking good. [laughter] She like, Joey, [141:32] I had to cancel the [ __ ] thing. She [141:34] was doing like a workout, a cooking [141:36] thing. She goes, "No, I just play with [141:37] my cats. That's it." And people love [141:39] cats. She goes, "That's it." But it's [141:41] it's impossible. The [ __ ] you say so [141:44] many animals out there [141:45] >> and they're out there and they don't [141:46] give a [ __ ] and they say [ __ ] [141:48] >> It's also there's zero consequences for [141:50] saying horrible [ __ ] [141:51] >> And they're trying to get a rise out of [141:53] the other people in the comments, too. [141:54] So, they're trying to say outrageous [141:55] [ __ ] so that other people react to it so [141:58] that you'll read it, you'll react to it. [142:00] >> It's It's the dumbest [ __ ] thing [142:02] ever. [142:02] >> It is. I was thinking this last night. [142:06] It's kind of a crazy thought, but you [142:08] know, everyone is addicted right now to [142:10] social media and addicted to going [142:12] online and just addicted to content. [142:14] You're constantly getting content. [142:15] You're constantly interacting with your [142:17] phone. And this is a very new thing, [142:19] right? It's within the last 20 years [142:21] this has happened to people. This is [142:23] like prepping us for what's coming next. [142:25] We're going to look back on these days [142:27] and we're going to realize, oh, the [142:30] addictions to the phones, the addictions [142:32] to staring at the screens and checking [142:34] your email and looking at YouTube and [142:35] looking at Instagram and looking at [142:37] Twitter, that's just preparing you for [142:40] you being completely connected to [142:42] electronics forever. This is like the [142:45] early stages of it. I was thinking about [142:48] it last night while I was watching this [142:49] television show. I'm watching this crazy [142:51] show. It's called From. Have you seen [142:53] this show? [142:53] >> No. No. It's nuts by the guys who made [142:56] Lost. One of the dudes that's in Lost is [142:59] the main star of it. It's [ __ ] great [143:01] show. Like really good show. Like very [143:03] unpredictable, twisted, just like Lost. [143:06] Like crazy show about these people stuck [143:08] in this town. They can't get out. It's [143:09] impossible to get out. But I was [143:12] thinking while I was watching this, I [143:13] was like, why why is everyone because no [143:15] one has a phone there and everyone's [143:17] just locked into this place. I was like, [143:19] your phone is preparing you. The [143:21] addiction to our phones are preparing us [143:24] to the next stage of what life is going [143:27] to be like as a person. This is just the [143:30] gate. The phones are the gate. But [143:33] what's coming next? You're going to [143:35] reminisce about the days of the phone. [143:37] Oh, you remember when we had phones? We [143:40] had to look things up. You had a little [143:41] thing. You got to charge it. Remember [143:42] when you had to charge it? That's how [143:44] we're going to be. We're moving into [143:46] some weird new area. They're building [143:48] these [ __ ] data centers everywhere [143:50] and everyone's like, "Oh, the data [143:52] center. [ __ ] great." Like, what? What is [143:54] that? What are you doing? Why are you [143:56] building these things that need to be [143:57] powered by nuclear reactors? Why you do [143:59] Why you building these things that are [144:00] sucking up all the [ __ ] water? Why [144:02] are they putting these things out in the [144:03] middle of the desert, big as [ __ ] [144:05] five football fields, huge [ __ ] giant [144:08] buildings filled with computers? Like, [144:10] what the [ __ ] are we doing? [144:14] And the gates is this goddamn phone. [144:16] This phone is the gate. We're We're [144:19] opening up the door to us completely. [144:21] >> I'll tell you why. My daughter can't [144:23] watch a whole movie. [144:24] >> They have no attention span. 40 minutes [144:27] in, she has to leave and then she'll [144:29] start it from the next day. I had to [144:31] watch Scarface though. [144:33] >> You had her watch Scarface? [144:34] >> Yeah, cuz she we watch we do [144:35] experimentals at the house. [laughter] [144:37] We did the fight club. We do all that [144:39] [ __ ] So she said, "Dad, I always only [144:41] watch the part when he shoots the the [144:46] brother-in-law, you know, that's the [144:48] only part of it. It's always on when I [144:50] come down." I go, "I want to watch from [144:51] the beginning." She enjoyed it for a [144:53] little while. I went upstairs. After one [144:56] scene, I'm like, "I can't watch this [144:57] again." She goes, "I'll stay up." [145:00] Two days later, mother goes, "Did you [145:01] see the review she wrote on it?" And I [145:04] go, "No." She goes, "Take a look at it." [145:06] And she's like, "I enjoyed the movie. I [145:09] was a fan because it was CubanAmerican. [145:11] But then as the movie rolled on, I [145:13] figured these Cubans don't know how to [145:15] treat women. [laughter] He goes, [145:21] they smacking them and shooting. [145:23] >> All you do is turn around. [laughter] [145:25] Wait for me. [ __ ] you. [145:27] >> She didn't [ __ ] like that at all. [145:29] She's like, I know my dad's Cuban, but [145:31] Jesus Christ, they're so mean to their [145:33] women. [145:35] >> I'm like, [snorts] do I act like that? [145:36] She go, no, but cocaine days. [145:39] >> Yeah. She said, she goes, "That gave men [145:40] a different [ __ ] thing." I go, "That [145:43] was 40 [ __ ] years ago." [145:45] >> Not only that, you're dealing with the [145:46] people that were the criminals of Cuba [145:48] that were kicked out of Cuba that made [145:50] their way to America. Like, this is not [145:52] normal people. [145:53] >> No. No. And now they're about to let the [145:56] second half out. Everything [145:58] >> What are they doing to Cuba right now? [146:00] Like, [146:00] >> well, they're not surviving. They don't [146:02] have any uh power, no gasoline. It's [146:06] funny because every couple days I get an [146:09] algorithm was just promoting Cuban [146:12] videos. [146:13] Cuban videos. People in like they had [146:15] kids going to work out. [146:19] They took them to like this little [146:20] place. Everything had papers on it. They [146:23] did pull-ups, situps with the head. The [146:25] pipes were broken. You got to see these [146:27] [ __ ] kids doing full workouts where [146:30] what we wouldn't even look at. They're [146:32] body weightight workouts, you know? [146:35] They talking they they go around [146:36] Baradero and they interview people and I [146:39] don't know what this is doing. I don't [146:41] know what this is doing because we're [146:42] two years away from Cuba being legit. [146:45] They're going to go back down there [146:46] after this whole thing goes or Raul or [146:48] whatever, whatever they decide they [146:50] can't get fuel from Venezuela. How long [146:52] is it going to take? I mean, they're not [146:53] going to be happy till they have a [146:54] Starbucks in Cuba. [146:56] >> So, what happened was they were getting [146:58] their oil from Venezuela, right? We took [147:00] over Venezuela. We cut off their oil. [147:01] >> Cut them off. And so what is the United [147:03] States trying to do with Cuba right now? [147:05] They're trying to get rid of the [147:07] communist government. [147:08] >> They're trying to Well, they're going to [147:09] they charged Raul Castro with something [147:11] recently. That's the beginning. This is [147:13] going to end up like [147:14] >> Fidel's brother. [147:15] >> You're going to wake up one day and on [147:17] ABC News. There they are in Cuba pulling [147:20] people out. And [147:21] >> but doesn't China and Russia have a [147:23] relationship with Cuba? Isn't that a [147:24] problem? [147:25] >> Not really, because they're not paying [147:27] their bills. That's why Cuba's starving. [147:29] When they had Russia, Russia was [ __ ] [147:31] doing everything, but then they didn't [147:33] need them no more and they cut them off. [147:35] >> I think there's they do small trades for [147:37] sugar or something. [147:37] >> It is kind of crazy for the United [147:39] States to have an enemy that's 90 [147:41] minutes offshore in a boat. [147:45] >> Trump administration said on 2026, May [147:48] 20th, indicted former Cuban President [147:50] Rul Castro for murder based on the [147:52] downing of two planes near the Cuban [147:54] coastline in 1996 that killed four [147:56] people. As a historian of Latin American [147:59] and US foreign policy, I believe the [148:00] indictment may be the prelude to a [148:02] direct US military action against Cuba. [148:04] >> This is the beginning. [148:05] >> This is uh Kevin A. Young from UMass [148:08] Amhurst. Uh before Castro, the last US [148:11] indictment of a Latin American leader [148:12] occurred in January 2026. That's the [148:16] Venezuela thing. Since January, US has [148:19] ended the flow of Venezuelan oil to Cuba [148:21] and has economic and military pressure [148:23] to prevent other nations from trading [148:24] with the island. Trump recently [148:26] threatened a friendly takeover of Cuba. [148:29] I believe what's missing from most [148:31] recent analysis of this situation is the [148:33] history of US aggression against Cuba is [148:36] essential context for understanding the [148:38] Trump administration's recent [148:39] escalations. [148:41] >> Yeah. Once they indict you, they're [148:42] coming for you. It's just a matter of [148:44] time. [148:44] >> Like the starving the country. [148:46] >> We walk up. Yeah. They just [148:47] >> And then they'll come up with a [148:48] solution. Here's your solution. You need [148:50] to put in new leadership. [148:51] >> But they're not telling you there's a [148:52] shooting or two in Cuba every night. [148:53] Cuba's not getting there's no power. [148:56] There's no electricity. They have [148:58] roaring what do you call and that was [149:00] yesterday [149:01] >> earthquake. [149:01] >> Yeah. Biggest one in 15 years. [149:03] >> So they're just [ __ ] they're doing [149:05] everything they can say was the biggest [149:06] one in over 150 years. [149:08] >> Oh my god. [149:09] >> Yeah. So everything is looking like [149:11] right now that's it. They can survive [149:13] this. [149:14] >> [ __ ] [149:15] >> So [149:16] >> So what happens to those people? They [149:17] just wait this out or the United States [149:20] and so they get no resources, no [149:22] supplies. [149:23] >> You got two things in Cuba. You have [149:25] people that don't know. [149:28] >> You never watch that 30 for30 with El [149:30] Duk when they won the championship and [149:32] they said people in New York were [149:34] throwing toilet paper and the wife was [149:35] grabbing it saying in Cuba this is gold. [149:39] Why are you throwing away toilet paper? [149:40] We have no toilet paper in Cuba. That's [149:43] a mentality. So 50% of those people have [149:45] been brainwashed to the where they, you [149:48] know, every day there's a bullhorn [149:50] buenos. [149:52] You know, when the communists, whatever [149:53] they call each other. [149:54] >> Yeah. Comrades, [149:56] >> we're winning the war. We're getting [149:57] close. You know, what do you mean I'm [149:58] getting closer? I'm down to 118. I was [150:01] walking around at 170. [150:03] >> How are we getting closer to a victory? [150:05] So they're getting sick of that [ __ ] [150:07] They say the bugs that land on you at [150:09] night are [ __ ] just atrocious. these [150:13] bug, you know, they have real [ __ ] [150:15] bugs on that island. Not to mention, [150:17] they all have syphilis. [150:20] Cubans have syphil. I think half my [150:21] fungi toenail is syphilis cuz it smells [150:25] like it. You know what I'm saying? But [150:26] on the on a [ __ ] not jokey thing, the [150:29] Cubans got two weeks left. Two weeks [150:32] from today. [150:33] >> And so you think they're going to [150:34] invade? [150:34] >> Yeah, they're going to invade. Take [150:35] Madur uh take Raul out. And then what do [150:38] you got? They're going to install some [150:40] new. [150:41] >> I remember a couple months ago there was [150:43] a shooting in Cuba of a boat. [150:46] >> You remember that, right? Right, Jamie? [150:48] >> Some people were out there fishing and [150:49] the Cuban Navy shot him. [150:52] >> What? [150:52] >> Like three months ago? Oh, yeah. This is [150:54] >> Why did they shoot? [150:55] >> I don't know. They were investigating [150:56] it. [150:57] >> Cuba hands out weapons to citizens and [150:59] tell them prepare for an invasion. Holy [151:02] [ __ ] [151:04] >> Holy [ __ ] That's June 7th. That's [151:06] Sunday. [151:07] >> Sunday. Hold two weeks away, bro. [151:10] Distributing weapons to its citizens in [151:12] fear of a US invasion. They reportedly [151:14] started handing out weapons to civilians [151:16] as the government urges population to [151:18] prepare for a potential US invasion. [151:20] Reports from South American publication [151:22] Version Final stated uh against the [151:24] backdrop of the deployment of American [151:26] military power near the island, the [151:28] government of Havana began distributing [151:30] weapons to citizens, officially urging [151:32] them to prepare for an imminent foreign [151:34] invasion. What if the citizens use that [151:37] weapon to take over the country, [151:38] >> which they should do? That's what they [151:40] [ __ ] should do. Just call the [ __ ] [151:42] >> crazy risk. [151:44] >> Start handing out guns to people. [151:45] >> Like I said, man, [151:46] >> all a sudden your population is armed [151:48] and you're telling them what to do. [151:50] [sighs] [151:50] >> And they don't have any money. And you [151:52] don't have any money either. [151:54] >> Look, man. When I started doing okay, I [151:58] contacted my sister. [152:01] I offered her a free ticket out of Cuba. [152:03] money. Whatever I got half is yours. [152:06] You're my blood, you know? [152:07] >> Right. [152:08] >> I don't know if I can do that. Okay, why [152:10] don't we do this? Why don't I fly you to [152:12] Jersey? You go to your mother's grave. [152:14] You go see where her house was, her way [152:16] of life, and then I take you back. [152:19] She told me I can never do that cuz I'm [152:21] married to one of Fidel's guys. I don't [152:23] even want to go to the United States. [152:24] >> Oh jeez. [152:26] >> So, she was so brainw. [152:30] Well, you're used to what you're used [152:32] to. [152:33] >> Yeah. And that's what [152:34] >> a big chance of coming to America and [152:36] not knowing where you're going to eat [152:37] and how you gonna live and where you [152:39] gonna get money. Are you going to work? [152:40] Are you going to have a great [152:41] >> They got programs for all those people. [152:43] They got churches. Cuban people have [152:45] churches. They're Catholics. [152:47] >> Is there also a thing where you if you [152:50] leave Cuba, I think there's it's a a [152:53] cleaner path to get to become a United [152:56] States citizen. You're fleeing. [152:58] >> Yes, it's easier. I think so. something [153:00] like that. If you're playing violent [153:01] dictatorship, military dictatorship, [153:05] >> [ __ ] dude. [153:07] >> It's just like [153:09] >> what are they going to do about that? [153:10] >> And then you got to We're talking about [153:12] Vegas. What's going to happen in Vegas [153:13] if Cuba reopens? [153:15] >> What do you mean? [153:16] >> They're going to put gambling back [153:17] there. You know, the Americans going to [153:19] put gambling back there. They're in [153:21] negotiations already with Hers already. [153:24] They're talking [153:25] >> turn into a resort, a location. They're [153:28] not going to rip down the architecture [153:30] that original architectures what makes [153:32] Cuba and the cars and [ __ ] but also [153:35] some something else. But, and I know [153:36] America knows this. [153:38] >> Those oceans are booby trap. [153:41] >> Up to a mile out of Cuba. There's a ton [153:43] of [ __ ] that they have. Booby trap [153:45] mines, all that [ __ ] They planted those [153:48] during the Bay of Pigs invasion. [153:50] >> Look at this. [153:51] >> Cuba. 1957. [153:52] >> 1957. Back when the mob ran it. [153:55] >> Look at everybody dressed impeccably. [153:57] They would go there, people, know [153:59] nothing. [154:00] >> They loved it back then. They loved [154:01] going to Cuba. People would go there, [154:03] live it up, [154:04] >> and sex was free and cheap and you could [154:07] [ __ ] a chicken those days. [laughter] [154:09] You get [ __ ] in the ass by a guy with [154:11] >> must have been amazing, [154:12] >> dog. It was unreal. That's why the whole [154:15] point of Kennedy and all that was for [154:17] them to get Cuba back. The Italians, [154:19] they were making too much money out of [154:21] Cuba. And now they want to start to put [154:23] drugs in there and [ __ ] towards when [154:24] they took it down. Cuba's been [ __ ] [154:27] riddled with [ __ ] for years. Every [154:30] bad luck that they have, they created in [154:32] the 50s and 40s because it was a sex [154:34] heaven. Americans would go down there on [154:37] a Friday and not come back. And you [154:39] know, it was whatever it cost here, [154:41] $8,000 will cost you $80 to get your [154:43] dick sucked for three days and fed [154:45] people rubbing your feet and [ __ ] [154:47] >> Castro Revolution had a major effect on [154:50] Las Vegas. Look at that. Closure of [154:51] Havana Casinos spurred exodus to the [154:54] desert. Wow. Frank M's father. [154:56] Especially people in the [154:58] >> who? [154:58] >> Frank Mir's father. [155:00] >> What do you mean? Frank Mir's father. [155:01] >> Frank Mir's father was a casino. So [155:03] that's how he ended up in Vegas. [155:04] >> Oh. Oh. His name is Miranda. [155:07] >> Connected to [155:08] >> No. So Frank Mir's father was a casino [155:10] dealer in Cuba. [155:11] >> Oh. [155:11] >> When Cuba closed down, he went right to [155:13] Vegas. So a lot of those people went [155:15] right to Vegas. [155:16] >> Wow. [155:17] >> Really interesting [ __ ] That [155:18] >> that is interesting. It makes sense [155:20] because that those are the two places. [155:21] And if you're on the east coast, the [155:23] trip to Cuba is easy. [155:24] >> Was 30 minutes. It's [155:25] >> like going to Florida. [155:26] >> 30 minutes. It was what you and your [155:28] wife would do on the weekend. What do we [155:29] do? [155:29] >> How far is the flight from New York City [155:32] to uh New [clears throat] York City to [155:34] Florida is what, an hour? [155:35] >> Three. [155:36] >> Three hours. [155:37] >> Yeah. Because Trump is down there now. [155:38] So they go a different way now. No. [155:40] >> You can't go straight to Fort Lauderdale [155:42] or Miami. You got to go outside that [155:43] range if he's in [155:44] >> What did it used to be? [155:46] >> Two. [155:47] >> Two. Two hours. So New York City to Cuba [155:51] is only an extra half hour then. [155:52] >> That's it. New York City. [155:53] >> So like less than three hours. [155:55] >> Three hours you'll be on the island. [155:56] >> So it's basically the same as Vegas [155:58] then. [155:58] >> Yeah. [155:58] >> It's the middle. [155:59] >> The middle. [156:02] >> But you have the you're on an island. [156:05] It's a resort. [156:06] >> Nobody knows what's going on. [156:07] >> It's beautiful. [156:08] >> You know I told you that my mother would [156:10] tell me how all those Hollywood stars [156:11] would hide in Cuba, especially Rock [156:14] Hudson. [156:15] >> They would go that's where they would [156:16] suck dick on the weekends. [156:17] >> Oh, Rock Hudson. So all those Hollywood [156:19] people would go to Cuba, lock themselves [156:21] in. [156:23] >> There was no TMZ. There was no press, [156:25] >> right? [156:26] >> You know, these people in Cuba don't [156:27] have a new, you know, how they going to [156:29] get the pay [156:29] >> and everything's run by the mob. So it's [156:31] like just all sin and vice. [156:33] >> Whenever you got a minute, you run, you [156:34] read that a van turn. That book, [156:37] >> what is it called? [156:38] >> It's a van turn. It's a revolution from [156:40] three different places. Union City, New [156:42] Jersey, [156:43] New York City, and Miami. And how Oh, [156:46] no, no, not New York City. Tampa and how [156:48] those three cities [156:51] were like involved in that whole [156:54] >> what do you think is going to happen to [156:55] Cuba if you had a guess? [156:57] >> If I had to guess, come on. I'm already [157:00] seeing dollar signs. If you're a casino [157:02] right now with how bad casinos are doing [157:04] here, you're looking at that right [157:06] there. You're looking [157:07] >> Nocturn. [157:09] >> How the mob own how the mob owned Cuna [157:12] Cuba and then lost it to the revolution. [157:14] >> Yeah. Excellent book. Excellent. And so [157:16] that was Kennedy trying to get rid of [157:18] the mob. That's why they [157:20] >> when the mob put Listen, [157:23] >> Kennedy's father went to Chicago and he [157:26] talked to those people. They had to [157:28] pull. If you live in Chicago or where [157:29] else you win the primary, I don't know [157:32] how it works, Joe. I'm not a political [157:33] guy. [157:33] >> Well, they definitely helped Kennedy get [157:35] into office. [157:35] >> They helped Kevin get into office. [157:37] >> But then when he got into office, [157:38] >> he didn't help him get Fidel back. Then [157:40] the brother double timed him and then [157:42] they started shooting. And I don't I [157:44] don't know who shot Kennedy's. I'm just [157:45] saying this. [157:46] >> Well, the mob definitely didn't like [157:47] him. They were very upset. [157:48] >> They cut into their pocket [157:49] >> and he helped the mob helped him get [157:51] into office in the first place, [157:53] >> right? [157:53] >> And then once he got in, they started [157:55] prosecuting people and like, hey, [157:57] >> then he [ __ ] them with the the Bay of [157:59] Pigs [158:00] >> when he pulled off air support at the [158:02] last. [158:03] >> He didn't know that they were going to [158:05] do this and then when they told him [158:06] about it, he denied air support and air [158:09] support was critical to the success of [158:11] the mission. [158:12] >> Absolutely. and uh Operation Mongoose, [158:15] Robert Kennedy spearheaded his secret [158:17] government project to topple the Cuban [158:19] communist regime, working parallel to [158:22] the CIA's mob assisted efforts. [158:26] Um, but this is after the revolution, [158:28] right? This was when Fidel was running [158:31] Cuba, [158:32] >> right? [158:33] >> Right. [158:33] >> They were trying everything they do to [158:34] kill [ __ ] Fidel. They were doing [158:36] everything to see. [158:37] >> But this is after So what spurred the [158:40] Cuban takeover of of uh the the [158:43] military's taken over of Cuba. Mob [158:45] bosses like Sam Gianana and Santo [158:48] Trafocante were recruited to help [158:50] eliminate Castro using methods like [158:52] poison pills. Mafia wanted Castro gone [158:54] so they could reopen their multi-million [158:56] dollar Cuban operations. Wow. [158:59] >> That's all it was. It was money. [159:00] >> Wow. [159:01] >> Big money. Untraceable. [159:02] >> I can imagine. [159:03] >> Unfound. Untraceable. Nothing. Nothing. [159:06] >> And you're over there living the life. [159:08] >> Nobody knows nothing. My Lansky eating [159:10] [ __ ] Cuban food every day. [159:11] >> They probably had it all set up. It was [159:13] nice. And then the re [159:14] >> kosher Cuban food every day. [ __ ] my [159:17] >> So the what what did the people think? [159:20] The people think that these mob [159:21] [ __ ] they've taken over our [159:23] country. Let's let's let Castro come in [159:27] and we'll be socialists and everything [159:29] will be great. [159:30] >> Or did they just get taken over? [159:31] >> They got taken. What happened was Castro [159:33] went in there, Batista was horrible. [159:36] Batista was [ __ ] no better than [159:38] Castro. [159:40] So when Castro took over, he was to take [159:42] over Batista and make Cuba blah blah [159:44] blah. But in the conglomeration, he [159:47] became a communist somewhere along the [159:49] line. And then when he took over Cuba, [159:51] that's when he shut the casinos down. [159:53] >> He destroyed the [ __ ] casinos, you [159:55] know. [159:56] >> And then [clears throat] the Italians [159:58] got mad. They all came back and then [160:00] they were just they thought it was going [160:01] to be temporary [160:03] like this is going to be temporary. [160:05] We'll clean over this. So for years [160:07] Italians were just watching the news [160:09] waiting for somebody to kill [ __ ] [160:11] Castro. [160:13] It was the Italians. [160:15] >> And then when they thought that the [160:16] United States was going to go in there [160:17] and invade like, oh good, we're all set. [160:20] >> I wish there was more film from those [160:22] days so people could see like my mother [160:24] explained things to me. I wish she was [160:25] still alive because I could have like [160:27] she said the Italian food was different [160:29] in Cuba. She goes first off the pizzas [160:32] had lobster on them and shrimp already [160:34] back then in the 50s. [160:35] >> Wow. [160:36] >> They were making cuz she didn't like the [160:37] pizza in the United States. She goes not [160:39] the same. They put fresh shrimp from the [160:41] [ __ ] ocean, [160:43] >> lobster, [ __ ] all these other things. [160:45] They got these pies now in New York. I'm [160:47] scared to try them. I can't. They put [160:49] calamari on the pizza. How fat can you [160:52] get? [160:52] >> [laughter] [160:52] >> How [ __ ] fat do you want to be? You [160:55] go to these pizza place in Jersey, dog. [160:57] It's like ziti. A pound of ziti on a [161:00] slice of pizza. [161:01] >> There's pizza places in [clears throat] [161:02] Jersey that have just gone off. And the [161:04] sandwich places in Jersey. [161:06] >> Oh, your boy your boy is going off. No. [161:08] >> Oh, Giovani. But that's that's White [161:10] Plains. White Plains. That's phenomenal. [161:13] >> I've been doing nothing like Italian [161:15] delies on the East Coast. There's [161:17] nothing like it. [161:17] >> That smell like that cheese when you [161:19] walk in and the [ __ ] olives and [ __ ] [161:21] Oh, it's insane. [161:22] >> Unbelievable. Unbelievable. [161:24] >> There's too much pizza. Like it just too [161:26] much. [161:27] >> You know, it's funny. When I moved down, [161:29] like I'm scared to gain weight. The [161:30] pizza. I eat one slice a week. Maybe [161:34] maybe [161:36] since I had the knee surgery, I've been [161:38] doing the podcast at the house. So, I've [161:40] been ordering pizza from this one place [161:42] and my buddies go crazy. [snorts] That's [161:44] the best pizza we've ever had. It's [161:45] thin, sweet red sauce. [161:47] >> Oh yeah. [161:48] >> Extra cheese. You burn it. It's [ __ ] [161:50] thin. Oh my god. And the sweet red [161:52] sauce. God, [161:53] >> they know how to make pizza on the East [161:55] Coast. And they try out here. They do a [161:57] pretty good job out here, but it's just [161:59] not the same. [161:59] >> It's missing something. They don't. [162:01] >> Same as the sandwiches. There's some [162:02] good Italian sandwiches out here. [162:04] They're pretty good, but they can't [ __ ] [162:06] with like Giovani's place. [162:09] >> Bro, Giovani sent me two shipments that [162:11] were [162:12] >> He's the best. [162:12] >> I had to give half of it away. I'm like, [162:15] >> he sends you so much [162:16] >> [ __ ] salamis and [ __ ] dried. Oh, [162:19] >> the cheese is incredible, right? [162:20] >> Oh, and the cookies is [ __ ] cookies [162:23] to die for, bro. [162:24] >> Yeah. [162:25] >> You know, and that's everywhere. Like I [162:26] just stop [162:28] >> Yeah. [162:28] >> [ __ ] around like [162:30] >> Well, when I go to the east coast, I [162:31] just assume terrible. [162:32] >> I got to take you to this place. [162:34] >> Which place? You took me to Elito. That [162:36] was phenomenal. [162:38] >> Now is Kovo Steakhouse. [162:40] Whatever. But [162:41] >> it's a steakhouse now. [162:42] >> Yeah. [162:42] >> Is it great? [162:44] >> They [ __ ] me up a couple weeks ago. I [162:45] went in there five to nine. I've been [162:47] there three weeks in a row with big [162:49] party and then my wife wants and then a [162:51] friend wants. I go in there when they [162:52] have 5 to 9 like let me get a 14 ounce [162:55] with a [ __ ] beer and they're like [162:57] we're closed. [163:00] Ain't nobody in here. You can't make [163:02] another steak. No, we're closed. It's [163:04] not even 9:00. [163:06] No reason to go back. [163:09] >> That's a bummer. [163:09] >> You just I was [163:10] >> That's people want to go home. [163:11] >> Yeah. I don't give a [ __ ] It's a steak. [163:13] You guys are There's nobody in here. [163:15] Right. [163:15] >> The bar is cute in there. [163:17] >> Nobody's ever in there. They got a male [163:19] bartender. They got a blonde with big [163:20] tits. You see this place [laughter] [163:21] packed the [ __ ] up. You got a little [163:23] Spanish guy that's a great guy. [163:26] >> But but I go to this place now. They had [163:29] on the special three weeks ago. You [163:31] ready? [163:33] >> Stuff shells with lobster meat. [163:36] >> Out of the court inside [163:38] >> and he gives you five of them in a tray. [163:40] Oh sh [163:42] >> What's this place called? Asteria. [163:45] >> Where's it at? [163:45] >> Mar, bro. [163:47] >> This is my spot. [163:48] >> Yeah. [163:48] >> I go there because the dude will do [163:50] whatever I ask him to do. Like he he has [163:52] a menu, but then he'll go, "Joey, have [163:55] you tasted my Italian fried rice?" [163:58] You're like, "What are you talking about [163:59] Italian fried rice?" And he makes risoto [164:00] with lobster and shrimp or fried rice. [164:03] [laughter] [164:04] So he's going to add it. He's got a new [164:06] restaurant opening. So he lets me sample [164:07] everything. He makes a cheese steak to [164:11] die for with the bread with the seeds on [164:13] it. [164:14] >> Oh yeah. [164:14] >> The simolina bread. [164:16] >> Yeah. [sighs] [164:18] >> Oh my god. [164:20] >> Asteria. There it is. Oh, that looks [164:23] good. Yeah. There's nothing like East [164:25] Coast Italian food. Nothing even [164:27] compares. [164:29] >> No. Steve and Angelo in there, bro. They [164:31] don't [ __ ] around. [164:32] >> All right, let's wrap this [ __ ] up, [164:33] >> bro. Thank you for having me. [164:35] >> My pleasure. I love you. Thursday. I'm [164:37] around all week. [164:38] >> All right. All right. [164:38] >> But I'm in Atlantic City 7th and 8th at [164:40] Oceanceans Casino. White People Casino. [164:43] >> July 7th and 8th. [164:44] >> No, August. [164:45] >> August 7th and 8th. Okay. [164:47] >> Chicago got announced November 5th. [164:49] >> Uh what's the website for people to go [164:51] to find out details? [164:52] >> I got no [ __ ] website. [164:54] >> Joey Diaz.com or [164:55] >> is that real? [164:56] >> I don't know anymore. [laughter] [164:58] >> All right. Well, they'll find you. [164:59] They'll find you. So, one more time, [165:01] where's the casino? [165:02] >> Uh Oceans Casino in Atlantic City, New [165:04] Jersey. The seventh and eighth. [165:06] Tremendous. Beautiful. All right. [165:07] >> I think the governor's coming. [165:09] >> The governor. [165:10] >> Yeah, Mikey Cheryl. I don't even like [165:12] her, but I do like Mikey Cheryl. [165:14] [laughter] [165:14] I do like Mikey Cheryl cuz she's a [165:16] Democrat. You're not supposed to like [165:17] him. But it was funny. I went to a [165:18] restaurant. Some guys like, "Hey, man. [165:20] Life would have been so much better with [165:22] Jack Chidarel." I go, I know, but he [165:24] lost by 400,000 [ __ ] votes. He tried [165:27] to a Republican in Jersey. That's never [165:28] going to [ __ ] work. They've been [165:30] Democrats since Jesus showed up. So [165:34] 400,000 votes, bro. [165:35] >> That's a lot. I'd be in my house with [165:37] the windows [ __ ] like sunny black and [165:39] Donnie Brasco with the windows the [165:40] shades drawn for a year. 400,000 [ __ ] [165:44] >> See that podcast I did with Joe Pone? [165:45] >> Yes. Very good. He was very good on it. [165:48] >> He was amazing. [165:48] >> He's a good dude, too. He's a good [165:50] [ __ ] savage. [165:51] >> What a crazy life. The real Donnie Bras. [165:54] I mean, really [ __ ] lived like that. [165:56] >> And he infiltrated the bananas. [165:58] >> Yeah. Deep. [165:59] >> They never recovered from that. [166:01] >> They even loved him after he [ __ ] [166:03] came out and they found out he was a [166:04] cop. They're like, "Oh, you were better [166:06] than me." That's like one of the guys [166:08] said that to him. "Hey, you you won. You [166:11] beat me." Wow. Nuts. [166:14] >> All right. [166:14] >> I love you, brother. Thank you very [166:16] much, man. [166:16] >> We're going to have lunch tonight. All [166:17] right. Bye, everybody. [166:24] [music]